Transcript Developing Intimate Relationships

Intimate Relationships and
Communication
Chapter 4
Developing Intimate
Relationships
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Successful Relationships require:
– Positive Self-concept and Self-esteem
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developed in infancy and childhood
gender roles
attachment
adult styles of loving
less than ideal childhood can still have a successful
relationship
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Developing Intimate
Relationships
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Successful Relationships require:
– Friendships
• based on companionship, respect, acceptance, help,
trust, loyalty and reciprocity
• may be longer lasting and more stable
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Love, Sex, and Commitment
One of the most basic and profound human
emotions.
 These 3 are linked ideals in intimate
relationship.
 Characteristics of love, sex and
commitment.
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Sternberg’s Classifications
of Love
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Based on degrees of intimacy, passion and
commitment:
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Liking
Infatuation
Romantic
Fatuous
Empty
Companionate
Consummate
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The Pleasure and Pain of Love
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Recognize the human emotions
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Two components:
1. Physiological arousal
2. Emotional explanation
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The Transformation of Love
All relationships change over time.
 High levels of passion.
 Growth of intimacy.
 Reduction of romance and or passion to the
transformation of deep love.
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Stresses on a Intimate
Partnership
Unequal or Premature commitment
 Unrealistic Expectations
 Competitiveness
 Balance of Time together and apart
 Jealousy
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Successful Relationships
Realistic expectations
 Mutual trust
 Open communication
 Effective ways to resolve conflict
 Agreement on religious/ethical values
 Equal roles
 Balance of individual and joint interests
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Ending a Relationship
Reasons why?
 Guidelines of a breakup
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Fair chance
Be fair
Be tactful
Time for resolving your anger and pain
The value of the experience
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Communication
Nonverbal
 Ability to interpret nonverbal messages
 Self-disclosure
 Listening
 Feedback is a constructive response
 Gender differences in communication
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Conflict and Conflict Resolution
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Conflict resolution skills are vital for
maintaining intimate relationships.
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Clarify the issue.
Find out what each person wants.
Identify various alternatives.
Decide how to negotiate.
Solidify the agreements.
Review and negotiate.
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Pairing and Singlehood
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Choosing a Partner.
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Attraction.
Similarities.
Communication.
Acceptance.
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Dating
Different cultures have different rituals for
finding a mate.
 American Culture.
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– Getting to know each other.
– Traditional male-female dating pattern.
– Dating of young people.
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Cohabitation
Factors of acceptance
 Rarely continues indefinitely
 Advantages
 Liabilities
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Partnership
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Gay and Lesbian
– Sexual orientation
– Homosexual relationships in relation to
heterosexual relationships
– Traditional gender roles
– Societal attitudes
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Singlehood
Diverse group
 Factors that contribute to a growing number
 Advantages
 Disadvantages
 Enjoyment depends upon:
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Marriage
Benefits of Marriage
 Issues of marriage
 Role of Commitment
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Divorce
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High rates.. Why?
– Process of Divorce.
• Physical separation.
• Emotional separation.
– Greatest stress producing event next to the
death of a spouse.
– Recovery from divorce.
– Remarriage.
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Family Life
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Becoming a Parent
Family life cycle
Preparation for parenthood
– Own stability and readiness
to be a parent
– Physical health
– Teenage parenting
– Over the age of 35
– Nutritional habits
– Genetics
– Financial
– Considered educational and
career plans
– Emotionally ready
– Social support
– Attitudes and aptitudes
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Preconception Care
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Preexisting medical
condition
Current use of
medications and drugs
Use of tobacco and/or
alcohol
Past problems with
pregnancy
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Disease risks and
immunization history
Dietary habits
Family history of
genetic diseases or
multiple births
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Birth of First Child
Stressful transition
 Return to traditional gender roles
 Each stage of the Family Life Cycle
– New parents:
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• worry about choices and mistakes
• no set rules
• most important is to promote satisfaction for
all family members.
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Birth of First Child
Later stages: balance between giving
freedom and setting limits
 Marital satisfaction tends to decline when
children are in school
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Building Blocks of Parenting
Modeling
 Trust
 Respect
 Love and Discipline
 Honesty
 Positive Statements
 Time, Attention, Concern
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Single-parent Families
Differences to a traditional family life cycle.
 Difficulties experienced as a single parent.
 Single Fatherhood.
 Children from single-parent families.
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Stepfamilies or Blended Families
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3 out of 4 women and 4 out of 5 men will remarry.
Should not be expected to duplicate the emotions
and relationships of an intact family.
Healthy stepfamilies are less cohesive and more
adaptable than healthy intact families. Allow for
more individual differences.
More of a history they have the more of a family
unit is built.
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Qualities of Successful Families
Commitment
 Appreciation
 Communication
 Time together
 Spiritual wellness
 Coping with stress and crisis
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