Transcript Personal Narrative- College Essay Peer Revision 1

Personal Narrative/ College Essay
 Check for MLA format:
 MLA heading
 MLA page numbering
 Title
 12 pt. font, Times New Roman
 2-3 pages (Sophomores)
 Prompt at beginning & Word count at end (seniors)-
800-1000
 1” margins
 Read the introduction ONLY.
 Next to the introduction, write the strategies you see
being used.
 Put a  next to the introduction if it catches attention.
 Put a  next to the introduction if it does NOT catch
attention.
 Read the conclusion paragraph ONLY.
 Underline the lesson learned in the paragraph.
 Is the lesson specific? Does the lesson show depth of
thought? Is it too shallow? Does it need more
elaboration?
 Make comments as needed on the lesson learned.
 Read the essay and underline any dialogue that you see.
 Check the dialogue format.
 Is it punctuated correctly?
 Is it indented if there is more than one speaker?
 Does it have a dialogue tag OR is it obvious who is speaking?
 Next to the dialogue, answer the question: What purpose
does the dialogue serve in the essay?
 If you are not able to tell why the dialogue is being used, OR if
it seems random, please tell them to revise it so that it’s more
purposeful.
 Does the essay tell a SINGLE story?
 If not, please write a note at the TOP of the essay,
telling the writer to focus on one story and delete the
others.
 Read the entire essay.
 Highlight any VOICE that you see:
 Striking language
 Exact language
 Natural language
 If there is any place that needs MORE voice, circle it and
say “add voice.”
 In essence, if any part of the essay is boring, it needs more
voice!
 Read the entire essay.
 Check for organization.
 Does the story have a clear beginning, middle, and end?
 Do all paragraphs make sense? Are they in the correct
order? Do any paragraphs and/or sentences need to be
moved?
 Make comments accordingly.
 Read the entire essay.
 If there is any word, any sentence, any part that does
not make sense and needs revising, please put a STAR
next to it.
 Read the entire essay.
 Pay attention to grammar and mechanics.
 Make any revisions necessary.
 Remember, if you do not understand HOW to correct
something, but you know it doesn’t sound right,
simply put a ? Mark next to it!
 And look over the corrections and comments