Transcript Conflict with Power and Privilege in Mind

Conflict Resolution with
Power and Privilege in
Mind
Amy Benson, Steve Lew
9:00
10:00
12:15
1:15
Introductions, Agenda, Agreements
Listening Skills, Communication
Breakdowns, Inquiry Skills
Break
Awareness of Conflict Styles & Social
Privilege
Lunch
What’s Power Got to Do With It
2:00
3:10
4:05
4:20
Observation Skills, Break, Empathy Skills
Re-engage Using 60 second statement
Your Next Steps
Evaluation and Close
10:40
11:00
2
Communication Agreements
Step Up, Step Back
Speak from “I”
Intent is different from impact
Ouch/Oops
3
When have you had an authentic
conversation?
What made it authentic to you?
For the Speaker:
When was the last time you were fully
listened to? What went well?
What key ingredients were in the
conversation?
For the Listener:
Practice focused listening.
Ask questions.
When does your communication
break down?
On Page 9, look at the list of “Communication Breakdowns”.
What did you observe about Richard & Maryann that
contributed to the communication breakdown?
Inquiry
1 – refer back to your real life conflict or communication break down.
2 – what are 1 or 2 questions that would help me learn more about what’s
going on for the other person?
3 – what questions can I ask the other person to disrupt their assumptions,
consider another perspective, and help them connect to their values?
Understand Your Conflict Style:
Teach Back!
Avoid
Accommodate
Compete
Compromise
Collaborate
In your manual, place yourself on different
parts of each line, by how close or how far
you are to the center, and benefitting from
social privilege.
Social group privilege is access, benefits, advantage
that increase life chances,
based on a mythical “norm”.
Communication Competencies
Self aware
Behaviors
Empathy- self
empathy
Listening
Inquiry
Able to process
emotions
Observation
Cultural values
and assumptions
Responsible
feedback
Aware of power
Aware of triggers
Take ownership
and commit to
personal change
FLO-0147-2DC-4N
Using Social Privilege
5 Tips for Being an Ally!
Power is the ability to shape outcomes
for yourself, and others.
Power
OVER
Power
WITHIN
Responsible
uses
Power
UNDER
Power
WITH
Ladder of Inference
How can you observe without judgment?
Skill of Observation
1- Turn to “Skill of Observation” worksheet in your manual
2 - Free Write for 5 minutes about “what happened” on the lefthand side of the page– feel free to be as “judge-y” as you want.
Make assumptions. Blame the other person.
3 - When the bell chimes, you’re going spend 5 minutes on the
right hand side of your page. Pick a few details in your story and
see if you can turn them into neutral observations.
For example: She got angry with me as soon as I mentioned the trip.
She stormed out of the room.” becomes “I mentioned the trip and she
frowned. A minute later she left the room quickly and didn’t respond.
Empathy and Self Empathy
1.
5.
Pair Up &
Take Turns as
“A” & “B”
Person B
takes their
turn in the
same exercise
2.
Person B
interviews
A about the
concern.
3.
Person A moves
to another chair,
takes on role of
the person in
conflict with A.
4.
A moves back to
their chair, and
back to their
perspective.
60 second statement: feedback
* we will ring a chime when it’s time to move to the next step
1- Use the reflection questions on the 60-Second Statement page in
your workbook to think about your conflict.
2- Underline the parts that you might want to share with the other
person
3- Using the underlined words from your worksheet, draft a “60second statement” that you could use to re-engage that person
4 - Share your statement out loud with your partner
5- Partner – listen for tone of voice, body language, anything that
takes away from the speakers intended meaning or impact
Action Planning: Where Change Happens
17
What are your next
steps?
Please complete your EVALUATION and
leave at the entrance- thank you!
Email us! With your questions, reflections, success
stories…
[email protected]
[email protected]