Transcript ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN “BEING”

ACTION SPEAKS
LOUDER THAN BEING
Active verbs, BE verbs, helping verbs, and
passive voice
Form of Be
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Is
Am
Are
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Was
Were
Be
Being
Been
Has
Have
Had
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Do
Does
Did
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Shall
Will
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Should
Would
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Might
May
Must
Can
Could
Just being is sufficient action to
qualify as a verb…
Her
husband is on
the sofa.
He still had a discoera polyester leisure
suit.
However, BE verbs are rarely the
best choice. Try something else…
 Her
husband vegetates
on the sofa.
 He still owned (sported?
wore? possessed?) a
disco-era polyester
leisure suit.
Passive voice
Emphasizes
the
action itself instead of
who or what
performed the action.
Active voice
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The voice used to indicate
that the grammatical subject
of the verb is performing the
action or causing the
happening denoted by the
verb.
Passive Voice
PASSIVE:
The check was signed by the
accountant.
ACTIVE:
The accountant signed the check.
Passive Voice
PASSIVE:
Carl and Earl were rejected by
every girl in town.
ACTIVE:
Every girl in town rejected Carl
and Earl.
USAGE RULE:
If
you know (or
care) who is doing
it…then say so!
When to use Passive Voice
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To emphasize the action
rather than the doer of the
action
 The
rich debutante was
arrested and scrubbed
with antiseptic soap.
When to use Passive Voice
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When who did it is unknown or
unimportant
The crimes have been
solved.
 The office was ransacked
and the copy machines were
sacrificed to the gods.
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Sample #1 - Original
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…There are other minor regrets I have, like
quitting instruments, not going camping with my
friends one weekend, and not buying that shirt
or those shoes. Even though I’ve learned there
are moments in one’s life that are regrettable,
there are always ways to change those regrets
into learning experiences that you can use as a
guidance to pave the right path for your future.
Sample #1 - Revision
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…Other minor regrets also nag me, (stick in my
subconscious), like quitting instruments, not
going camping with my friends that one
weekend, and not buying that shirt or those
shoes. Yet, through these experiences I learned
that life’s moments of regret can change into
learning experiences that provide guidance and
pave the right path for the future.
Sample #2 - Original
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Time marches on with or without us.
When I was eight I dreamed of reaching
thirteen, finally having the title of
teenager. When I was thirteen, I
anticipated the golden age of sixteen, the
freedom of your driver’s license and the
knowledge of responsibility like I had
never had before…
Sample #2 - Revision
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Time marches on with or without us. At
eight I dreamed of reaching thirteen,
finally boasting the title of teenager. At
thirteen, I anticipated the golden age of
sixteen, the freedom of a driver’s license,
and a new level of knowledge of
responsibility…
Sample #3 - Original
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When I was a young child, my
mother would always play either jazz
music or classical music on the radio.
She would play Kenny G., Toni
Braxton, Patsy Cline, and other
artists. I remember being in the car
always falling asleep to the music…
Sample #3 - Revision
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When I was a young child, my mother
always played either jazz music or
classical music on the radio--Kenny
G., Toni Braxton, Patsy Cline, and
other artists. I remember falling asleep
to that music in the car…
ON-LINE ASSIGNMENT
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Log on to www.dianahacker.com/pocket
Click on the BLUE BOX that says “Electronic Grammar
Exercises”
Click on “Clarity” and a list of exercises will appear in a
drop down menu.
SELECT EXERCISE 2-3
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SIGN IN WITH YOUR FIRST AND LAST NAME
Enter my email address:
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Active verbs (edit and compare)
[email protected]
Complete the exercise—be sure to click on “possible
revisions” after each response.
At the end, PRINT RECORD of your responses and
turn it in.
Writing Assignment
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Revise your first essay for active language and minimal
use of BE verbs.
Strive for significant change and improvement in the
strength of the language and writing.
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Major re-write, not just in-text substitution of verbs.
Bring out the power in the story using vivid and active language.
Do not settle for anything less than a great story.
THIS REVISION IS DUE no later than TUESDAY.
STAPLE THE NEW REVISION TO THE TOP OF THE
FIRST DRAFT and turn them both in together.
Will be graded on level of improvement from first draft to
this revision.