Transcript Unit 4 Seminar

Unit 4 Seminar
Body Language and Nonverbal
Communication
Importance of Nonverbal
Communication
Up to 85%
of communication
is nonverbal!
What you NOTICE can greatly help you
understand the other person and navigate
discussion accordingly
OBSERVATION SKILLS ARE
IMPORTANT, BECAUSE…
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Verbals can be contrasted by nonverbals
(incongruency) which reveal the other
person’s true feelings…
…or supported by nonverbals (congruency)
which accentuate the person’s feelings
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Observation can help you bridge individual,
cultural, and/or gender differences
Nonverbal communication cues can
play five roles:
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Repetition: they can repeat the message the person is making
verbally
Contradiction: they can contradict a message the individual is
trying to convey
Substitution: they can substitute for a verbal message. For
example, a person's eyes can often convey a far more vivid
message than words and often do
Complementing: they may add to or complement a verbal
message. A boss who pats a person on the back in addition to
giving praise can increase the impact of the message
Accenting: they may accent or underline a verbal message.
Pounding the table, for example, can underline a message.
Nonverbal communication and
body language in relationships
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It takes more than words to create fulfilling, strong
relationships. Nonverbal communication has a huge
impact on the quality of our relationships. Nonverbal
communication skills improve relationships by helping
you:
Accurately read other people, including the emotions
they’re feeling and the unspoken messages they’re
sending.
Create trust and transparency in relationships by sending
nonverbal signals that match up with your words.
Respond with nonverbal cues that show others that you
understand, notice, and care.
For discussion
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When you picture people you talk to on
the telephone, through email or in
newsgroups (such as in your Kaplan class)
before meeting them face to face, does
your expectation of how they will look
usually turn out to be accurate?
Types of nonverbal communication
and body language
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Facial expressions
Body movements and posture
Gestures
Eye contact
Touch
Space
Voice
It’s not what you say, it’s how you
say it
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Intensity. A reflection of the amount of energy you
project is considered your intensity. Again, this has as
much to do with what feels good to the other person as
what you personally prefer.
Timing and pace. Your ability to be a good listener and
communicate interest and involvement is impacted by
timing and pace.
Sounds that convey understanding. Sounds such as
“ahhh, ummm, ohhh,” uttered with congruent eye and
facial gestures, communicate understanding and
emotional connection. More than words, these sounds
are the language of interest, understanding and
compassion.
For discussion
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How are nonverbal cues displayed in
computer mediated communication
(emails and newsgroups)?
What To Observe
In The Other Person’s Nonverbal
Communication
Notice Body Language
How to Use Body Language
Effectively
USE:
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Mirroring
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assume posture and movements of other person
Pacing:
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start with mirroring, then move to more positive posture/movement
OBSERVE:
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When movement is synchronous
• mirroring one another’s movements
When movement is complementary:
• harmonious movements
When movement is dissynchronous
• differing movements that might show conflict
Notice Facial Expression
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incongruent smiling
look of confusion or being lost
expressionless or flat affect
affect demonstrating various moods or emotions
blood flow changes (e.g. blushing or growing pale)
avoiding eye contact, inconsistent eye contact, or intense
staring
grimacing, frowning
eyes welling up
tightening of lips
agreement, understanding, connection, excitement
Notice Eye Movements
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Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)
suggests that there is a link between
the way our eyes move and the way we think
In NLP, eye movements are known as eye accessing
cues—they enable us to access certain information
Noticing eye movements can help us to understand how
a person relates to the world—i.e. visually, auditorily, or
kinesthetically—and communicate with them according
to THEIR representational systems
Eye Accessing Cues
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Looking up, or defocusing, usually represents visual
accessing
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Looking sideways usually represents auditory accessing
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Looking down to the right (your left as you face the
person) usually
represents kinesthetic accessing
Looking down to the left (your right as you face the
person) usually represents an internal dialogue
Applying accessing cues
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For those visually accessing, respond in terms of SEEING
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For those auditorily accessing, respond in terms of
HEARING
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“This is how you see it…”
“I see what you mean”
“It sounds like you aren’t happy with that grade”
“I hear what you’re saying”
For those kinesthetically accessing, respond in terms of
FEELING
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“That must feel awful”
“I feel happy for you”
For discussion
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What do nonverbal cues such as typos,
slang, spelling errors, incomplete
sentences, and poor sentence structure
communicate to the receiver about the
sender?
Improving your nonverbal
communication skills
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Video camera – Videotape a conversation between you and a
partner. Set the camera to record both of you at the same time, so
you can observe the nonverbal back-and-forth. When you watch the
recording, focus on any discrepancies between your verbal and
nonverbal communication.
Digital camera – Ask someone to take a series of photos of you
while you’re talking to someone else. As you look through the
photos, focus on you and the other person’s body language, facial
expressions, and gestures.
Audio recorder – Record a conversation between you and a friend
or family member. As you listen to the recording afterwards,
concentrate on the way things are said, rather than the words. Pay
attention to tone, timing, pace, and other sounds.
Tips for successful nonverbal
communication:
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Take a time out if you’re feeling overwhelmed by stress. Stress
compromises your ability to communicate. When you’re stressed out, you’re
more likely to misread other people, send off confusing or off-putting
nonverbal signals, and lapse into unhealthy knee-jerk patterns of behavior.
Take a moment to calm down before you jump back into the conversation.
Once you’ve regained your emotional equilibrium, you’ll be better equipped
to deal with the situation in a positive way.
Pay attention to inconsistencies. Nonverbal communication should
reinforce what is being said. If you get the feeling that someone isn’t being
honest or that something is “off,” you may be picking up on a mismatch
between verbal and nonverbal cues. Is the person is saying one thing, and
their body language something else? For example, are they telling you
“yes” while shaking their head no?
Look at nonverbal communication signals as a group. Don’t read too
much into a single gesture or nonverbal cue. Consider all of the nonverbal
signals you are sending and receiving, from eye contact to tone of voice
and body language. Are your nonverbal cues consistent—or inconsistent—
with what you are trying to communicate?
SOME
CULTURAL
DIFFERENCES
Eye Contact and Gaze
Western cultures:
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Direct eye contact seen as positive
Differs for some races
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African American—more eye contact when talking, less when listening
Anglo Americans—often the opposite
Prolonged eye contact may be seen as sexual interest
Arabic cultures:
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Prolonged eye contact is common
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Shows interest
Helps them understand truthfulness
Japan, African, Latin American, & Caribbean cultures:
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Avoid eye contact to show respect
Facial Expressions
Many Asian cultures:
Suppress facial expression
as much as possible
Many Mediterranean cultures
Exaggerate grief or sadness
Most American men
Hide grief and sorrow
Touch
Western Cultures
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Handshake is common
Hugs, kisses for those of opposite gender, family
Some differences between African American & Anglo Americans
Islamic/Hindu cultures
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Typically don’t touch with left hand
Generally don’t touch between genders; with same sexes is appropriate
Common to see two men or two women holding hands (friendship)
Many Asian cultures
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Don’t touch the head because it houses the soul
Latino, Middle-Eastern, & Jewish cultures
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Touch is okay—emotion encouraged
Opposite-sex handshakes acceptable; usually same-sex
English, German, Scandinavian, Chinese & Japanese cultures
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Do not subscribe to overt displays of affection
Posture
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Bowing
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Slouching
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Disrespectful in Turkey
Sitting with legs crossed
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Rude in most Northern European areas
Hands in pocket
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Not done, criticized, or affected in US
Shows rank in Japan
Offensive in Ghana, Turkey
Showing the soles of feet
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Distasteful in Thailand, Saudi Arabia
Personal Space
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In this picture we see a woman's
reactions as her personal space is invaded
by three other people. What will happen?
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a. She will ask them to sit somewhere else
b. She will stare at the space "invaders"
defiantly, but she will not move
c. She will leave, saying nothing to the
three people who invaded her personal
space
Appearance and Self-Image
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This man comes from a culture where
HEAVIER women are seen as more
attractive. Can you guess where he comes
from?
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a. Jamaica
b. New Guinea
c. Ivory Coast
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While traveling in another country, this
American woman stayed with a local
family. She was honored by being served
the 'best part' of the dinner: a bowl of
solid, coagulated chicken blood. Can you
guess the country she was visiting?
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a. Greenland
b. Vietnam
c. Uruguay
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Can you guess the meaning of this
Japanese gesture?
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a. I'm scared like a bunny
b. I've been hearing things about you
c. I'm angry
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In this picture, an experienced flight
attendant demonstrates a facial
expression she uses at work. Is she
performing genuine warmth, or is it
concealed irritation?
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a. Genuine Warmth
b. Concealed Irritation