Transcript The State of Our Unions:

Men are Computers
Women are cell phones
The State of Our Unions:
April 11 - AM
Typical Situation
• Husband arrives home from work
• Wife says, “I don’t know how we can do it.
You’re late. Richie has a game an hour from
here. One of us has to get him there by 7:00.
Jordan has a game here in town. Katey is
cheering at Jordan’s game but she has a
game right ahead of his. Daniel has practice
at …”
Typical Situation
• Wife realizes her husband has heard nothing
after the words “You’re late.”
• Most wives will agree – their husband is a
computer
– After a few seconds – the screen saver kicks in
– When there is information overload – it locks
up and must be rebooted
• This wife realized – She is married to a
computer
Typical Situation
• The husband has been telling his wife that
she is a cell phone.
• When he arrives home – she starts talking
– Everything that happened during her day
– All the bad news about the washer, taxes, and
the kids being sick
• Cell phones go off unexpectedly
• They ring at inopportune moments
• Wives keep calling until they get an answer
Different Wiring
Men are Computers
One way communication –
send email or photo
Women are Cell Phones
Two-way communication – talk
and listen at the same time
Wired Differently
• Dr. James Dobson – Love for a Lifetime
• “Research makes it clear that little girls are
blessed with greater linguistic ability than
little boys, and it remains a lifelong talent.
Simply stated, she talks more than he.”
• Men speak about 25,000 words a day
• Women speak about 50,000 words a day
Wired Differently
• When the man gets home – he has used
about 98% of his daily allowance
• He is down to simple phrases:
– “Butter”
– “Any desert?”
– “Where’s the paper?”
• She still has most of her allotment.
– She calls – gets a busy signal
– Actually – the computer is in sleep mode
Wired Differently
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They have much in common
Both have digital chips, memory, battery
Both are designed to communicate
Both need a connection
• Now cell phones can send and receive email
from computers
Communication
• A man asked a marriage counselor if they
really needed to learn to communicate.
• The counselor asked, “What is your wife’s
favorite flower?”
• After thinking for a moment answered, “It
is Pillsbury – All Purpose.”
• The State of our Unions –
We Need Communication
Need for Communication
• For Bible Study
• Acts 17:2-3 - 2Then Paul,
as his custom was, went in
to them, and for three
Sabbaths reasoned with
them from the Scriptures,
3explaining and
demonstrating that the
Christ had to suffer and
rise again from the dead,
and saying, “This Jesus
whom I preach to you is
the Christ.”
Need for Communication
• For Bible Study
• Romans 10:14-15 - 14How
then shall they call on Him in
whom they have not believed?
And how shall they believe in
Him of whom they have not
heard? And how shall they
hear without a preacher?
15And how shall they preach
unless they are sent? As it is
written: “How beautiful are
the feet of those who
preach the gospel of
peace, Who bring glad
tidings of good things!”
Need for Communication
• For Bible Study
• We must learn to
cooperate with each other
• To work together
• Humans are smart but not
mind readers
• If we are going to work
together, we must
communicate
Need for Communication
• For Bible Study
• To work together
• To settle disputes and
disagreements
• Acts 15:6-7 - 6Now the
apostles and elders came
together to consider this
matter. 7And when there had
been much dispute, Peter rose
up and said to them: “Men
and brethren, you know that a
good while ago God chose
among us, that by my mouth
the Gentiles should hear the
word of the gospel and
believe.
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude - love
• 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 - 4Love
suffers long and is kind; love
does not envy; love does not
parade itself, is not puffed up;
5does not behave rudely, does
not seek its own, is not
provoked, thinks no evil;
6does not rejoice in iniquity,
but rejoices in the truth; 7bears
all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all
things.
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude – love
• Don’t make
assumptions
• Don’t make gossip the
basis for your
communication
• Do not assume you know
what the other is thinking
• Jumping to conclusions is
a dangerous sport
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude – love
• Don’t make
assumptions
• Stay pure in speech
• Ephesians 4:29 - Let
no corrupt word
proceed out of your
mouth, but what is
good for necessary
edification, that it may
impart grace to the
hearers.
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude – love
• Don’t make
assumptions
• Stay pure in speech
• Control your anger
• Ephesians 4:26 - Be
angry, and do not
sin”: do not let the sun
go down on your
wrath,
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude – love
• Don’t make
assumptions
• Stay pure in speech
• Control your anger
• Keep your arms down
Prerequisites to Communicate
• Proper attitude – love
• Don’t make
assumptions
• Stay pure in speech
• Control your anger
• Keep your arms down
• Keep the voice calm
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Matthew 10:16 Behold, I send you
out as sheep in the
midst of wolves.
Therefore be wise
as serpents and
harmless as doves.
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Luke 16:8b - For
the sons of this
world are more
shrewd in their
generation than the
sons of light.
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Be quick to hear
• James 1:19 - So
then, my beloved
brethren, let every
man be swift to
hear, slow to speak,
slow to wrath;
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Be quick to hear
• Be slow to speak
• James 1:19 - So
then, my beloved
brethren, let every
man be swift to
hear, slow to speak,
slow to wrath;
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Be quick to hear
• Be slow to speak
• Speak calmly
• Proverbs 15:1-2 1
A soft answer
turns away wrath, But
a harsh word stirs up
anger. 2 The tongue
of the wise uses
knowledge rightly, But
the mouth of fools
pours forth
foolishness.
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Be quick to hear
• Be slow to speak
• Speak calmly
• Speak without
distortion of the truth
• Two simple
rules:
1. NEVER say
“Never”
2. ALWAYS avoid
“Always”
Rules of Communication
• Right time / Wrong
time
• Be quick to hear
• Be slow to speak
• Speak calmly
• Speak without
distortion of the truth
• Be patient
• Ephesians 4:2 with all lowliness
and gentleness,
with
longsuffering,
bearing with one
another in love,
Communication:
• Men are computers
• Women are cell phones
• We MUST learn to communicate
– In our marriages and homes
– On our job
– In the church
• How is your communication with God?