Transcript 倪爱玲老师---Writing

Writing
—By Ni Ailing
from Panhuang Experimental School
Task:
Learn to write
about persons
12, short hair, love
reading
(7A Unit1)
Millie is 12 years old.
She has short hair. She
loves reading.
Millie 's age, appearance and hobbby
12, short hair, wear glasses,
learn things quickly, kind and
helpful
(8A Unit1)
Daniel is 12 years old. He
has short hair and wears
glasses. He is clever and can
learn things quickly. He is
kind and helpful.
Daniel 's ability and perosonality
born in Hunan, a famous
composer, win the Nobel Prize in
2001, bring Chinese and western
music together (9A Unit5)
He was born in Hunan. He is a
famous composer. He won the Nobel
Prize in 2001. He has successfully
brought Chinese and Western music
together and built a bridge between
the East and West.
Tan Dun ’s job and achievements
age
job
achievement
future
plan
apperance
person
hobby
ability
personality
Work in groups
List some words, phrases or sentences
person
looks
short
…
hobby
like
football
…
personality
helpful
…
future plan
I want to
be…
…
ability
can learn
quickly
Collection:
appearance：short , tall, thin, of medium height,
strong, good-looking, nice, slim
hobby：like/ be fond of/enjoy reading
personality：lazy, quiet, friendly, shy, helpful, polite,
organized, hard-working, patient, humorous, generous,
future plan: He/She wants to be a … when he/she
grows up, He/She hopes he can be …, He/She hopes to
be…, His/Her dream is to be …
ability: be good at Maths, can learn things quickly, be
able to repair computers
Step
title
Step 1.
2. Examine
Make anthe
outline
计20 分
P1
P2
modest, generous,
humorous,...
P3
100词左右
How
thiscan
passage
we make
perfect?
the passage perfect?
Discuss: Is
Daniel is helpful and helps an old woman cross the
street. He is kind and often works at Helping Hand
Club. He is creative and creates a TV program.
express
inhe helped an old
Daniel is helpful and kind.
Once
man cross the street once.
He spends his spare time
different
working at Helping Hands
Club. He is so creative
ways
that he created a TV program.
Step 3. Write the passage
Link words:
however, also, besides, what’s more(除此以外),
in addition, so…
Sentence structures:
1. ... with + n. phrases/ prep. phrases
2. She/ He is a girl/ boy who......
3. so/such...that...
4. be+ adj.+ enough + to do...
5. not only... but also...
6. I have learned to be/ that...
7. It is… who/ that…
评分标准：
A.20—18分
涵盖所有内容要点，结构清晰，内容连贯，运用多种句式和
语法结构，基本无语法错误。
B.17—14分
涵盖大部分要点，内容基本连贯，语言少量错误。
C.13—9分
只能运用简单句表达，语言有较多错误，但尚能答意。
D.4—6分
能写出几个要点，但语言错误较多，影响了意思表达。
E.0—3分
白卷或文不对题，错误百出， 不知所云。
等级________ 理由__________ 评分人__________
Sample:
My friend Daniel comes from Beijing Sunshine Secondary
School. He has short hair and wears a pair of glasses. He
likes playing computer games, but dislikes sports.
He is helpful and kind. He often helps people in need. Last
week, I saw him help an old woman cross the road. He also
spends a lot of time working at Helping Hand Club. He also
has a good sense of humor. He often tells us funny jokes and
makes us laugh. What’s more, he is such a creative boy that
he created a TV program in a competition.
Daniel is so great that we should learn from him and try our
best to help each other to creative a happy home for both
you and me. (125 words)
Homework:
1. Write about the person you admire most or write
a recommendation letter.
2. Collect good words, phrases or sentences to
make your writing better.
Learn to write through writing!
Step 4. Improve your passage
Daniel has short hair. He wears glasses.
Daniel is a boy with short hair and a pair of glasses.
Daniel is creative. He created a TV programme.
Daniel is so creative that he created a TV
programme.
He often works at the Helping Hand Club.
He spends a lot of time working at the Helping
Hand club.
Step 5. Have a check
First, check if there are mistakes in
spelling, punctuation (标点) or grammar.
Second, check if the passage is expressed
fluently (流畅地).
3. Write the passage
My friend Daniel comes from Sunshine Middle
Scool. He has short hair and wears glasses. He
likes playing computer games and dislikes
sport.
He is helpful. Once I saw him help an old man
cross the road. He is kind and often helps at
Helping Hand Club. He is creative. He created
a TV programme. He is also modest and never
shows off.
We must learn from Daniel. We should help
each other.
What do you think of this passage?
Perfect/ Average/ Poor