Transcript Active Voice - Reeds Spring High School

Grammar Unit
Mr. Lynch
ACTIVE AND PASSIVE VOICE
Active and Passive Voice
 The
term voice, when used in English
grammar, refers to the structure of a
sentence. There are two “voices” in
English grammar


active voice
passive voice.
Active Voice
 In
an active voice sentence, the agent
(the one who does the action in the
sentence) is stated explicitly as the
grammatical subject.
 The thing that the agent does something
to (the direct object) comes after the
verb.
Active Voice Example
Active Voice Sentence: Julio cooked fried rice.
“Julio” is the agent. He’s the one who does the
action. In this case, he’s the one who cooked
the rice. In this active voice sentence, Julio is
the grammatical subject. What did Julio cook?
He cooked fried rice. The words fried rice make
up the direct object. The fried rice is the thing
that the agent (Julio) does something to. In this
case he cooked it.
Passive Voice
 In
a passive voice sentence, the thing
that the agent does something to, is
placed as the grammatical subject of the
sentence.
 The agent (the one who does the action)
is placed after the subject, usually in a
prepositional phrase. In fact, sometimes
the agent is hidden, not even mentioned.
Passive Voice Example
 Passive
Voice Sentence: The fried rice
was cooked by Julio. (The agent is
mentioned.)
 Passive Voice Sentence: The fried rice
was cooked. (The agent is not
mentioned.)
When to Use the Active Voice
 Use
the active voice in most of the writing
you do in school and at work.
 Studies in readability indicate that active
voice sentences, where the agent is
stated first, are easier to understand than
passive voice sentences.
3 Reasons to Use Passive Voice
1.
When the receiver of the action is more
important than the agent.



Active Voice: The Nobel Foundation awarded
President Obama the Nobel Peace Prize.
Passive Voice: President Obama was awarded
the Nobel Peace Prize.
The passive voice construction places the
emphasis on the receiver of the Nobel Peace
Prize, not on the organization that awarded the
prize.
3 Reasons to Use Passive Voice
2.
When you consciously try to minimize the
role of the agent or the agent is not
known.


Active Voice: Marie Jenkins could not
complete the status report because James
McDonald misplaced the manufacturing
data.
Passive Voice: The status report was not
completed because manufacturing data
were misplaced.
3 Reasons to Use Passive Voice
3.
When you write about scientific,
technical, or natural processes.
 Active
Voice: The conveyor belt delivers the
shrink-wrapped product to the packing
station.
 Passive Voice: The shrink-wrapped product is
delivered to the packing station.
Active and Passive Conclusion
 Using
active voice or passive voice is a
stylistic and rhetorical choice about
sentence structure.
 It’s important to understand the structure
so that you control the structure instead of
letting the structure control you.
 Remember; use the active voice in most
of your academic and work-related
writing.
Active and Passive Practice
When the Phillie’s Shane Victorino overran
him, third base was stolen by Johnny
Damon.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
Johnny Damon stole third base when the
Phillie’s Shane Victorino overran him.
Tip
 The
judicious use of the active voice or
the passive voice requires thought. It is up
to the writer to determine when the
active voice makes sense and when the
passive voice makes sense.
 In
this sentence, the focus, the
IMPORTANCE, is carried by Johnny
Damon.
Active and Passive Practice
A happy Thanksgiving is wished by me for
everyone.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
I wish everyone a happy Thanksgiving.
Tip
This sentence is fairly simple. “I” is the agent,
and should be the grammatical subject of
the active voice construction.
Active and Passive Practice
The attorney general indicted the notorious
gangster, Al Capone, for federal income
tax evasion.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
The notorious gangster, Al Capone, was
indicted for federal income tax evasion.
Tip




This sentence forces students to determine
what the focus of the sentence should be.
Should it be the attorney general? Should it
be Al Capone?
Most readers would find that the focus should
be Al Capone. In fact, the agent seems
insignificant compared to the receiver of the
action.
The trailing prepositional phrase (“by the
attorney general”) is best left out.
Active and Passive Practice
The student services committee forwarded
revised disciplinary procedures to the
campus president.
The revised disciplinary procedures were
forwarded to the campus president.
Tip
 The
“revised disciplinary procedures”
carry more weight than the student
services committee. It’s a judgment call.
Active and Passive Practice
Six Thousand shares of Disney stock were
bought by Jenny Allen when she was only
nineteen.
Jenny Allen bought six thousand shares of
Disney stock when she was only nineteen.
Tip
 The
focus really should be on the agent, a
young woman who had enough foresight
(and money!) to buy 6000 shares of Disney
at age 19.
Active and Passive Practice
People can view the dazzling meteor shower
from the observation tower at the planetarium.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
The dazzling meteor shower can be viewed
from the observation tower at the planetarium.
Tip
 The
focus should be the “dazzling meteor
shower.” Who (or what) else could “view”
it, if not people?
 Again, although the word “people” is the
agent, the focus should be on the
recipient of the action, the meteor
shower.
Active and Passive Practice
The acceptance letter from Harvard was
received by Jenny Arteaga last Tuesday.
Jenny Atreaga received the acceptance
letter from Harvard last Tuesday.
Active and Passive Practice
An invitation to Francis Suarez’s victory party
was received by Mr. Packer, the state party
chairman.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
Mr. Packer, the state party chairman, received
an invitation to Francis Suarez’s victory party.
Tip
 Although
the idea is not related to
active/passive voice, some students will
want to omit the appositive “the state
party chairman” from the revised
sentence.
 Remember that using an appositive is a
good way of defining a term within the
flow of the sentence.
Active and Passive Practice
The Baseball Writers Association of America
named Joe Mauer, the Minnesota Twins’
catcher who led the American League with a
.365 batting average, MVP for 2009.
Possible Answers:
A) Active
B) Passive
Joe Mauer, the Minnesota Twins’ catcher who
led the American League with a .365 batting
average, was named MVP for 2009.
Tip
 The
focus of this sentence should clearly
not be “The Baseball Writers Association of
America”; it should be Joe Mauer.
Apostrophe Errors
Apostrophe Errors

it's vs. its: A common error in our writing is using the
apostrophe (or NOT using it) incorrectly when
trying to show that something belongs to
someone. Here is a common mistake:

Error: The dog lost it's collar.

It is correct to refer to a dog using "it." A dog is not
a person, and despite our sometimes inordinate
love for our pets, pets are not human. Only
humans deserve "his" or "her."
Forms of its and it’s (it is)
 The
word its is the possessive form, the one
that shows ownership.
 The
word, it's is actually a contraction of
two words, it is.
 Correct
Form: The dog lost its collar.
Formal Writing
 In
formal writing, it is best (not “it’s best”)
not to use contractions.
 Use
the expanded form it is, instead of the
contraction it’s.
 The
form its’ does not exist. Do not use it,
ever.
Who’s vs. Whose
 Another
common error is confusing whose
with who's.

Error: The post office manager, who's
mother is in the hospital, retired.

Correct: The post office manager, whose
mother is in the hospital, retired.
You’re vs. Your
 Some
students often confuse the
homonyms you’re (you are) and your
(possessive).

Error: The dog ran away with you’re coat.

Correct: The dog ran away with your coat.
They’re vs. There vs. Their
 The
most commonly confused apostrophe
error comes from the correct usage of
they’re (they are), there (location), and
their (ownership).

Error: There not going their tonight.

Correct: They’re not going there tonight.
Apostrophe Practice
If you think your going to the movies tonight,
your mistaken.
Correct: If you think you’re going to the
movies tonight, you’re mistaken.
TIP: This sentence would be grammatically
correct if spoken, but conventional English
requires the use of the apostrophe “re”.
Tip
 As
a “rule of thumb”: Do not use
contractions in formal academic writing
unless writing dialogue or consciously
using an informal tone.
Apostrophe Practice
The boy who's dog was sent to the pound
cried uncontrollably.
Correct: The boy whose dog was sent to the
pound cried uncontrollably.
Apostrophe Practice
A good dog always cleans its’ food bowl.
Correct: A good dog always cleans its food
bowl.
TIP: Remember its’ is not a word.
Apostrophe Practice
The Sisters of Saint Joseph support they're
convent with outside employment.
Correct: The Sisters of Saint Joseph support
their convent with outside employment.
Apostrophe Practice
Its never as good a deal as the salesperson
makes it out to be.
Correct: It’s never as good a deal as the
salesperson makes it out to be.
Apostrophe Practice
The rugby players promise that their not
going to stop playing after August.
Correct: The rugby players promise that
they’re not going to stop playing after
August.
Apostrophe Practice
Their not going to the carnival, and your not
either.
Correct: They’re not going to the carnival,
and you’re not either.
Apostrophe Practice
Its never too late to apply, even when the
registrar's office closes it's doors.
Correct: It’s never too late to apply, even
when the registrar's office closes its doors.
Apostrophe Practice
Its’ important to realize whose actually using
the computers in the lab.
Correct: It’s important to realize who’s
actually using the computers in the lab.
ATTRIBUTIONS
Attribution

When students (or any writers, for that matter)
use material from secondary sources, they
must attribute or “give credit” to the writer of
the material.

Teachers expect students to use this standard
academic practice when they write anything
(research papers, reviews, or critical essays)
that uses another writer’s material as the basis
for an essay.
Verbs of Attribution
 Certain
verbs make “giving credit to” or
attributing information to others easy.
These verbs are called verbs of attribution.
Several verbs of attribution exist, but we
will list only a few of the most common
ones.
Verbs of Attribution
• Affirms
• Argues
• Asserts
• Believes
• Claims
• Concludes
• Contends
• Explains
• Maintains
• Observes
• Remarks
• States
• Suggests
• Writes
Although all of these verbs “give credit to” someone for saying
something, the verbs mean slightly different things.
For example, it is different to “argue” something than it is to
“suggest” it. Pay attention to the subtleties of meaning.
Attribution in Direct Quotation
 To
quote directly means to use the exact
words as the original.
 Example:
Willa Cather writes that “on
either side of this road straggled two
uneven rows of wooden buildings.”
Appositives
 If
necessary, tell the reader who the
author is by using an appositive, a short
definition set off by commas.
 Example:
Willa Cather, an American
novelist who described frontier life, writes
that “on either side of this road straggled
two uneven rows of wooden buildings.”
Using “that” in Attributions

Sometimes, when you quote an author
directly, you may use a verb of attribution
without the relative pronoun that, as in the
following sentence. In this case, the first word
of the quoted sentence is capitalized.

Example: Willa Cather, an American novelist
who described frontier life, writes, “On either
side of this road straggled two uneven rows of
wooden buildings.”
Attributions in Paraphrasing
 To
paraphrase means to say, in your own
words, something as close to the original
as possible, ideally to say the same thing
as the original – but in your own words.
 Example:
Brené Brown, a research
professor of social work at the University of
Houston, concludes that whole-hearted
people typically embrace vulnerability.
Tips on Attributions

If an idea is within quotation marks, it is the
original author’s exact words and must be
placed within quotation marks.

Brackets [ ] indicate the addition of a word, a
minor change that is not in the original
author’s text.

If the idea lacks quotation marks, it is a
paraphrase of the original.
Attribution Practice
(Machiavelli) “it is much safer to be feared than
loved, when, of the two, either must be
dispensed with.”
Answer 1: Machiavelli claims that “it is much
safer to be feared than loved, when, of the two,
either must be dispensed with.”
Answer 2: Machiavelli claims, “It is much safer to
be feared than loved, when, of the two, either
must be dispensed with.”
Attribution Practice
(William Sumner, an early proponent of Social
Darwinism) “every effort to realize equality
necessitates a sacrifice of liberty.”
Answer 1: William Sumner, an early proponent of
Social Darwinism, concludes that “every effort to
realize equality necessitates a sacrifice of liberty.”
Answer 2: William Sumner, an early proponent of
Social Darwinism, concludes, “Every effort to realize
equality necessitates a sacrifice of liberty.”
Attribution Practice
(Benjamin Franklin) if people want to
convince someone else of their opinion,
they should adopt the guise of “the humble
inquirer and doubter.”
Answer 1: Benjamin Franklin maintains that if
people want to convince someone else of
their opinion, they should adopt the guise of
“the humble inquirer and doubter.”
Attribution Practice
(Adam Smith, a classical economist) “The real
price of everything … is the toil and trouble of
acquiring it.”
Answer 1: Adam Smith, a classical economist,
states that “the real price of everything … is the
toil and trouble of acquiring it.”
Answer 2: Adam Smith, a classical economist,
states, “The real price of everything … is the toil
and trouble of acquiring it.”
Attribution Practice
(Mrs. Goddard Orpen) “A grain of sand, or some such minute
foreign substance, gets within the jealous valves of the [oyster]
and causes great irritation to the soft body of the pulpy
inhabitant.”
Answer 1: Mrs. Goddard Orpen explains that “a grain of sand,
or some such minute foreign substance, gets within the jealous
valves of the [oyster] and causes great irritation to the soft
body of the pulpy inhabitant.”
Answer 2: Mrs. Goddard Orpen explains, “A grain of sand, or
some such minute foreign substance, gets within the jealous
valves of the [oyster] and causes great irritation to the soft
body of the pulpy inhabitant.”
Attribution Practice
(Frederick Douglass) he does “not remember to
have ever met a slave who could tell of his
birthday.”
Answer 1: Frederick Douglass asserts that he
does “not remember to have ever met a slave
who could tell of his birthday.”
Answer 2: Frederick Douglass asserts, “I do not
remember to have ever met a slave who could
tell of his birthday.”
Attribution Practice
(W. E. B. Du Bois) “education among all kinds of men always
has had, and always will have, an element of danger and
revolution, of dissatisfaction and discontent.”
Answer 1: W. E. B. Du Bois contends that “education among
all kinds of men always has had, and always will have, an
element of danger and revolution, of dissatisfaction and
discontent.”
Answer 2: W. E. B. Du Bois contends, “Education among all
kinds of men always has had, and always will have, an
element of danger and revolution, of dissatisfaction and
discontent.”
Attribution Practice
(Susan B. Anthony) when people come
together to form a nation, they do not
relinquish their rights.
Answer 1: Susan B. Anthony suggests that
when people come together to form a
nation, they do not relinquish their rights.
COMMA SPLICES
Comma Splices
 To
understand comma splices you must
understand grammatical terms like
"clause" and "independent clause.”
Comma Splice vs. Fused Sentence
 Some
people use the term “run-on
sentence” to refer both to fused
sentences and comma splices. These two
terms refer to two different errors.
Comma Splice vs. Fused Sentence
A
comma splice is a comma that joins
(splices) two independent clauses. A
clause is a group of words that has a
subject and a verb.
Comma Splice vs. Fused Sentence
A
fused sentence, on the other hand,
occurs when two independent clauses
(complete ideas) are joined without any
punctuation.
Comma Splice vs. Fused Sentence
 It
is better to avoid the term run-on
sentence altogether and use only the
terms comma splice and fused sentence.
They are more specific and more
descriptive.
Comma Splices
 In
standard written American English,
comma splices are not allowed. In other
English-speaking communities, they are
more accepted. If you are writing for a
North American audience, it is important
to avoid comma slices.
Independent Clauses

Example of an Independent Clause:

Robert ate worms.

This is a clause. Robert is the subject, and ate
is the verb. This clause is "independent"
because it can stand alone as a sentence.

Now let's take another independent clause:

Mary dislikes Robert.
Comma Splices
 If
you take two independent clauses and
join them with a comma, you have a
comma splice:
 Robert
 To
ate worms, Mary dislikes Robert.
splice means to join, and in standard
American English, you're not supposed to
use comma splices in writing. It is a formal
rule. Comma splices are easy errors for
teachers and editors to notice.
How to Fix a Comma Splice

Make two sentences instead of one:


Use a semicolon (;).


Because Robert ate worms, Mary dislikes Robert.
Use a semicolon plus a conjunctive adverb
(therefore, then, however,...).


Robert ate worms; Mary dislikes Robert.
Use a subordinating conjunction (because, when,
since, although,...).


Robert ate worms. Mary dislikes Robert.
Robert ate worms; therefore, Mary dislikes Robert.
Use a coordinating conjunction (for, and, nor, but, or,
yet, so) after the comma.

Robert ate worms, so Mary dislikes Robert.
Conjunctions
 Remember,
you can’t use words like
however and so just because they make
grammatical sense. These words mean
something.
 The words although, however, but, and
yet indicate a contrast:

I was on a diet; however, I still gained
weight.
Conjunctions
 The
words because, therefore, and so
indicate a cause and effect relationship.
The words and and then indicate that you
are simply adding information. Use words
cautiously.
Comma Splice Practice
This sentence is wrong, it has a comma splice.
Two sentences: This sentence is wrong. It has a
comma splice.
Semicolon: This sentence is wrong; it has a comma
splice.
Subordinating Conjunction: This sentence is wrong
because it has a comma splice.
Conjunctive Adverb: This sentence has a comma
splice; therefore, it is wrong.
Coordinating Conjunction: This sentence has a
comma splice, so it is wrong.
Comma Splice Practice
Eliza ran to the store, then she bought some candy.
Two sentences: Eliza ran to the store. Then she
bought some candy.
Semicolon: Eliza ran to the store; then she bought
some candy.
Subordinating Conjunction: When Eliza ran to the
store, she bought some candy.
Conjunctive Adverb: Eliza ran to the store; then she
bought some candy.
Coordinating Conjunction: Eliza ran to the store, and
then she bought some candy.
Comma Splice Practice
The stock market has moved in one
direction lately, it has gone down.
Two sentences: The stock market has moved
in one direction lately. It has gone down.
Semicolon: The stock market has moved in
one direction lately; it has gone down.
Comma Splice Practice
Elvis Presley was a great singer, he was never really accepted
by the country music's mainstream.
Two sentences: Elvis Presley was a great singer. He was never really
accepted by the country music's mainstream.
Semicolon: Elvis Presley was a great singer; he was never really
accepted by the country music's mainstream.
Subordinating Conjunction: Although Elvis Presley was a great
singer, he was never really accepted by the country music's
mainstream.
Conjunctive Adverb: Elvis Presley was a great singer; however, he
was never really accepted by the country music's mainstream.
Coordinating Conjunction: Elvis Presley was a great singer, but he
was never really accepted by the country music's mainstream.
Comma Splice Practice
Computer programs help us live saner lives, obviously the
people who write them should make lots of money.
Two sentences: Computer programs help us live saner lives.
Obviously the people who write them should make lots of money.
Semicolon: Computer programs help us live saner lives; obviously
the people who write them should make lots of money.
Subordinating Conjunction: Since computer programs help us live
saner lives, the people who write them should make lots of money.
Conjunctive Adverb: Computer programs help us live saner lives;
therefore, the people who write them should make lots of money.
Coordinating Conjunction: Computer programs help us live saner
lives, so obviously the people who write them should make lots of
money.
Comma Splice Practice
Dubai has built magnificent office towers with luxuries and conveniences, it is
considered a great location in which to conduct international business.
Two sentences: Dubai has built magnificent office towers with luxuries and
conveniences. It is considered a great location in which to conduct international
business.
Semicolon: Dubai has built magnificent office towers with luxuries and
conveniences; it is considered a great location in which to conduct international
business.
Subordinating Conjunction: Because Dubai has built magnificent office towers with
luxuries and conveniences, it is considered a great location in which to conduct
international business.
Conjunctive Adverb: Dubai has built magnificent office towers with luxuries and
conveniences; therefore, it is considered a great location in which to conduct
international business.
Coordinating Conjunction: Dubai has built magnificent office towers with luxuries
and conveniences, so it is considered a great location in which to conduct
international business.
Comma Splice Practice
Brazil has won several world cups championships in soccer,
they are always considered a good team.
Two sentences: Brazil has won several world cups championships in
soccer. They are always considered a good team.
Semicolon: Brazil has won several world cups championships in
soccer; they are always considered a good team.
Subordinating Conjunction: Because Brazil has won several world
cups championships in soccer, they are always considered a
good team.
Conjunctive Adverb: Brazil has won several world cups
championships in soccer; therefore, they are always considered a
good team.
Coordinating Conjunction: Brazil has won several world cups
championships in soccer, so they are always considered a good
team.
CONFUSING SENTENCES
Confusing Sentences
 What
is a confusing sentence?
 The entire sentence lacks a certain logic.
It’s as if the writer transferred his or her
thoughts quickly to the paper and then
forgot to revise.
A Confusing Sentence
 Consider
the following sentence:
 The purpose of the program allows a
student to solve a quadratic equation
interactively.
 We understand what the writer is trying to
say, but the sentence is confusing.
Revising a Confusing Sentence
 “The
purpose” of anything never simply
“allows.”
 Revision
1: The purpose of the program is
to allow a student to solve a quadratic
equation interactively.
 This
revision is correct, but it is wordy.
Revising a Confusing Sentence

Who (or what) does the action in the sentence? In other words,
who (or what) is the agent?

Revision 2: The program allows a student to solve a quadratic
equation interactively.

If we make “The program” the doer of the action, then a program
certainly “allows” a student to solve a quadratic equation.
Better yet:

Revision 3: The program solves a quadratic equation interactively.

In Revision 3, the agent is the grammatical subject, and what the
agent does (solves) follows as the main verb of the sentence.
Revising a Confusing Sentence
 If
we make “a student” the agent, then
we have a sentence like Revision 4.
 Revision
4: A student solves a quadratic
equation interactively by using the
program.
3 Guidelines to Clarity
 Determine
who the “main character” in
the sentence is.
 The “main character” is usually the person
who does the action. Sometimes we call
this “person (or thing) who does the
action” the agent.
 Start the sentence with the person who
does the action. In other words, start the
sentence with the agent.
3 Guidelines to Clarity
 Determine
what the agent is doing.
 What the agent is doing is usually stated
as the main verb.
 Look for verbs that actually say
something, strong verbs, rather than the
verb “to be.”
3 Guidelines to Clarity
 If
there are embedded clauses within the
sentences, do the same with those
clauses.
Example
 Confusing:
The reason for Smith’s firing is
because he lied in his employment
application.
 Revision:
Smith was fired because he lied
in his employment application.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 After
finally applying the prescribed
medication for a few days, is when
Michael started feeling better.
 Michael
started feeling better after he
applied the prescribed medication for a
few days.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 Sometimes
because of our jobs it prevents
us from spending more time with the
whole family and is the reason that
normally we all get together on holidays.
 We
don’t spend as much time as we
would like with our families because of our
jobs, so we normally all get together on
holidays.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 Now
that the little boy lied to his aunt
makes him believe that there is no Santa
Claus.
 The
little boy no longer believes in Santa
Claus because he lied to his aunt.
Confusing Sentence Practice

In my opinion of the Aesop fable is that I don't
think the old gardener was playing a trick on
his sons, however, it was a lesson that the old
gardener wanted to teach his sons about the
orchard.

The old gardener was not playing a trick on
his sons; he was teaching his sons a lesson
about the importance of cultivating the
orchard.
Confusing Sentence Practice

By telling them of a treasure will be found in
the garden was a perfect way to have his
sons involve in the garden, for his the old
gardener didn't have much time to live.

The old gardener told his sons about a
treasure in the garden because the gardener
didn't have much time to live and he wanted
his sons involved in cultivating the garden.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 First
reason why I treasure my watch is
because my sister bought it for me before
she left for the army.
I
treasure my watch because my sister
bought it for me before she left for the
army.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 When
I was about 6, I watched my mom
stare at her miniature spoon collection
before she walked out the door forever. I
thought why would she do that.
 When
I was about 6, I watched my mom
stare at her miniature spoon collection
before she walked out the door forever. I
always wondered why she would do that.
Confusing Sentence Practice
 By
running for student council was the
reason why Roderick improved his
popularity.
 Running
for student council improved
Roderick’s popularity.
DANGLING PARTICIPLES
Participles
 Participle:
A verb form used as an
adjective. It usually ends in ing, en, or ed.
 Example:
chair.
Laughing, Julio fell out of his
Gerunds
 Gerund:
A verb form used as a noun. It
ends in ing – always.
 Example:
Laughing makes me cry
sometimes.
Dangling Participles
 Gerunds
take care of themselves. Rarely
do students write confusing sentences
using gerunds. Participles, however, can
“dangle” or be misplaced.
Dangling Participle Example
 Dangling
Participle: Slipping on the wet
sidewalk, the keys fell from Amaury’s
pocket.
 This
sentence reads as if the keys slipped
on the wet sidewalk.
Dangling Participles




Dangling and misplaced participles often
give rise to absurdly humorous scenarios.
A “dangling participle” has no noun in the
sentence to which the participle would
logically attach.
A “misplaced participle” does have a noun,
but that noun does not come directly after
the participle, thus creating a confusing
sentence.
For our purposes, “dangling” and “misplaced”
are equivalent.
Fixing a Dangling Participle

Turn the Misplaced or Dangling Participle Into a Dependent Clause.

This means that you take the ing word (the participle), give it a
subject, turn it into a verb, and attach it to the main clause. Let’s
take the example above, with Amaury’s unfortunate slip on the wet
sidewalk.

Correct: When Amaury slipped on the wet sidewalk, the keys fell
from his pocket.

Here we have taken the original participial phrase (Slipping on the
wet sidewalk), and we have turned it into a dependent clause. We
understand that “Amaury slipped,” not the keys.
Fixing a Dangling Participle

Make the Thing Being Modified by the Participle, the Subject of the
Main Clause.

This means we take what is being modified by the ing phrase and
place it first in the sentence, right after the comma. Again, let’s use
the example of Amaury’s unfortunate slip.

Correct: Slipping on the wet sidewalk, Amaury lost his keys when
they fell from his pocket.

Note that “Amaury,” the person, NOT “Amaury’s keys” is placed
after the comma. You may be tempted to write “Amaury’s keys,”
but then you would have the same problem. Keys, even “Amaury’s
keys,” do not slip on wet sidewalks; people, like Amaury, do.
Fixing a Dangling Participle

Place the Participle as Close as Logically
Possible to the Noun it Modifies.

Misplaced: Crying and screaming, Mrs.
Williams led three-year old Mindy away from
the toy store.

Correct: Mrs. Williams led three-year old
Mindy, crying and screaming, away from the
toy store.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Shaken,
martinis.
 James
stirred.
not stirred, James Bond likes his
Bond likes his martinis shaken, not
Dangling Participle Practice
 Shaken,
martinis.
 James
stirred.
not stirred, James Bond likes his
Bond likes his martinis shaken, not
Dangling Participle Practice
 While
driving to the Homestead Campus,
a pillow fell from James’s car.
A
pillow fell from James’s car as he drove
to the Homestead Campus.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Shocked
by the foul language on
television, the remote control dropped
from Aunt Sherry’s hand.
 Aunt
Sherry dropped the remote control
because she was shocked by the foul
language on television.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Running
across Tropical Park, the paddle
boats on the lake appeared to be
floating on air.
 As
I ran across Tropical Park, the paddle
boats on the lake appeared to be
floating on air.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Attacked
by the school bully, the
backpack fell from Abner’s shoulder.
 Attacked
by the school bully, Abner
dropped his backpack.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Walking
barefoot through the tall grass,
dew drops felt good between my toes.
 As
I walked barefoot through the tall
grass, dew drops felt good between my
toes.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Driven
by insatiable ambition and greed,
the computer ran Henry’s stock trading
program all day.
 Henry,
driven by insatiable ambition and
greed, ran his stock trading program on
the computer all day.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Confused
by the new layout of the house,
the soiled diaper fell off the baby as he
cried and ran from room to room.
 The
baby, confused by the new layout of
the house, dropped the soiled diaper as
he cried and ran from room to room.
Dangling Participle Practice
 Staring
up at the tall buildings, the wallet
fell from Jasmine’s purse.
 As
Jasmine stared up at the tall buildings,
the wallet fell from her purse.
DEMONSTRATIVE
PRONOUNS
Demonstratives
 The
demonstratives this, that, these, and
those can make your writing easy to read
or difficult.
 They can also provide the emphasis that
you as a writer want to make.
 The word this, especially, can be
confusing if it is used carelessly at the
beginning of a sentence.
Potentially Unclear
 The
little league baseball team refused to
shake hands with the opposing team after
a lopsided loss. This set a bad example for
the players on both the losing team and
the winning team.
 In
this sentence, the demonstrative word
this is used as a pronoun.
Grammatically Correct?
 Some
writers may look at the first
sentence and think, “There’s nothing
wrong with the sentence,” and they
would be correct. There is nothing
grammatically wrong. The word this is a
demonstrative pronoun and serves as the
subject of the sentence.
Why the Sentence is Unclear




But in using only the pronoun this, the writer forces
the reader to “fill in” the concept that is being
referred to.
Make things easy for your reader and
communicate your intention or emphasis as a
writer clearly.
Notice that there are many terms that a reader
can use to “fill in” the concept after this: bad
behavior, refusal, petulance, immaturity…
Which one do you, as a writer, want to
emphasize?
A Clear Sentence
 The
little league baseball team refused to
shake hands with the opposing team after
a lopsided loss. This poor sportsmanship
set a bad example for the players on both
the losing team and the winning team.
 In
this revision, the demonstrative word this
is used as an adjective, modifying poor
sportsmanship.
A General Rule
 When
you start a sentence with a
demonstrative pronoun (this, that, these,
and those, especially this), make sure that
the next word (or words) is a noun that
defines the idea in the previous sentence.
 In
other words, turn the demonstrative
pronoun into an adjective.
Another Example
 Potentially
Unclear: The football coach
did not collect signed permission forms
from the parents, forgot to request the
playing field, and failed to schedule the
school bus for use as transportation. This
prompted the principal to reprimand the
coach.
Importance of Explanation



The reader knows that the pronoun this in the
second sentence refers to “all those things
that the coach did not do.” The concept is
fairly obvious.
However, a careful writer identifies the
concept and creates an emphasis or
connotation that the reader may not “fill in.”
Does the writer mean these lapses, this
neglect, this irresponsibility, these minor
oversights (note the emphasis), these
intolerable mistakes?
Revised as a Clear Sentence
 Clearer:
The football coach did not
collect signed permission forms from the
parents, forgot to request the playing,
and failed to schedule the school bus for
use as transportation. These minor
oversights prompted the principal to
reprimand the coach.
Demonstratives Practice
 The
chef forgot to include basil in making
the spaghetti sauce. This caused the meal
to be bland and led to a bad review in
Food magazine.
 This
mistake caused the meal to be bland
and led to a bad review in Food
magazine.
Demonstratives Practice
 Mary
Ellen made the honor roll, won an
essay contest, and was admitted to Mu
Alpha Theta. This improved her chances
of being admitted to a top university.
 These
accomplishments improved her
chances of being admitted to a top
university.
Demonstratives Practice
 Maria
waits until the last minute to do
everything. This causes her to lose out on
financial aid and lose the classes she
needs to take.
 This
procrastination causes her to lose out
on financial aid and lose the classes she
needs to take.
Demonstratives Practice
 Xavier
always completed his assignments
on time, never complained about
coworkers, and seldom took any sick time.
This led to his promotion.
 This
positive attitude led to his promotion.
Demonstratives Practice
 Marble
Slab Creamery offers waffle
cones, wafer cones, several ice cream
flavors, and many different toppings. This
is what makes their ice cream so
delicious.
 This
variety makes their ice cream so
delicious.
Demonstratives Practice
 Alicia
forgot she had to take care of her
little sister and went out with her friends
instead. This got her in trouble with her
mom.
 This
negligence got her in trouble with her
mom.
Demonstratives Practice
 Our
server did not bring drink refills,
communicated our order wrongly to the
chef, and sat down to speak with other
guests while we waited for our check. This
kept her from getting a generous tip.
 This
poor service kept her from getting a
generous tip.
FEWER vs. LESS
Fewer vs. Less
 Confusing
the words fewer and less is a
common error in student writing.
 The
most common error occurs when
students use less when they should use
fewer.
Usage of Fewer and Less

Wrong: The Korea initiative creates less jobs for
Asian workers than the Beijing Project.

Problem: The word jobs is countable. We can
count the jobs that are created. In the language
of linguistics, the word fewer is used with “count
nouns” (nouns we can count), while the word less
is used with “non-count nouns” (nouns we cannot
count).

Correct: The Korea initiative creates fewer jobs for
Asian workers than the Beijing Project.
Rule of Thumb
 Use
the word less only with “non-count
nouns.” Use the word fewer with “count
nouns.”
 Non-count
nouns may be physical nouns
that cannot be counted or abstract
nouns.
Physical Nouns (Non-count)
advice
air
aluminum
applause
Arabic
baseball
beer
biology
boating
cake
cheese
cloth
Creole
cricket
dancing
dust
economics
electricity
English
equipment
experience
flour
French
furniture
geography
glass
glue
hair
harm
heat
history
hockey
homework
ice
leather
luggage
math
meat
metal
milk
oxygen
Papiamento
photography
plastic
poetry
porcelain
publicity
reading
rice
rugby
sand
smoking
soccer
Spanish
steel
sugar
sunshine
traffic
Urdu
water
weather
wheat
wine
wood
wool
Abstract Nouns (Non-count)
Ambiguity
emotion
graciousness
irreverence
loyalty
peace
success
belligerence
ego
hope
jealousy
maturity
pride
tenacity
courage
fecundity
honesty
joy
negativity
romance
truth
dexterity
friendship
infatuation
liberty
omen
sadness
will
The Word “Less”
 Use
the Word less With Non-count Nouns
 Correct:
Animals consume less water in
the desert than they do in a rain forest.
Units of Measure




Physical nouns that cannot be counted can
be made “countable” by including some unit
of measure.
Wrong: Animals consume less liters of water in
the desert than they do in a rain forest.
Correct: Animals consume fewer liters of
water in the desert than they do in a rain
forest.
We cannot count “water”; however, we can
count “liters of water.” Thus the correct forms
are “less water” and “fewer liters of water.”
Abstract Nouns
 Abstract
nouns cannot ever be made
“countable” except in a figurative sense,
as in “The coward does not have an
ounce of courage.”
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 There
are less markers in the cabinet
today than yesterday.
 There
are fewer markers in the cabinet
today than there were yesterday.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Chefs
use less kilograms of flour making
pastries than making bread.
 Chefs
use fewer kilograms of flour making
pastries than making bread.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Less
automobiles cross the bridge at night
than in the afternoon.
 Fewer
automobiles cross the bridge at
night than in the afternoon.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Energy-efficient
appliances consume less
electricity than older appliances.
 Correct.
We cannot count the word
electricity, so we “consume less
electricity” but “fewer kilowatts.”
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Energy-efficient
appliances consume less
kilowatts of electricity than older
appliances.
 Energy-efficient
appliances consume
fewer kilowatts of electricity than older
appliances.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Janice
exhibits less emotional outbursts
than Alicia.
 Janice
exhibits fewer emotional outbursts
than Alicia.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Modern
buildings use much less steel
beams than older buildings.
 Modern
buildings use much fewer steel
beams than older buildings.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 This
spring, I plan to spend less Euros
travelling than I did last year.
 This
spring, I plan to spend fewer Euros
travelling than I did last year.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 People
spend less days vacationing than
they did in the past.
 People
spend fewer days vacationing
than they did in the past.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Peter
has lost less weight than John
because he does not eat less candy bars
at snack time.
 Peter
has lost less weight than John
because he does not eat fewer candy
bars at snack time.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 When
Ali moved to Brisbane, he packed
less bags than his sister.
 When
Ali moved to Brisbane, he packed
fewer bags than his sister.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 The
winery shipped less barrels of wine this
year.
 The
winery shipped fewer barrels of wine
this year.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Chinese
food uses less grams of cheese
per serving than Mexican food.
 Chinese
food uses fewer grams of cheese
per serving than Mexican food.
Fewer vs. Less Practice
 Florida
ships less tons of sugar today than
it did last decade.
 Florida
ships fewer tons of sugar today
than it did last decade.
FUSED SENTENCES
Fused Sentences
 Some
writers, in fast and furious drafting,
may write sentences that contain two
complete ideas, punctuated only with a
comma or containing no punctuation at
all. Both are wrong in standard American
English.
Fused Sentence - Definition
A
fused sentence occurs when two
independent clauses are joined (fused)
without any punctuation.
Example
 My
father designs and installs wind
turbines he travels all over the Saudi
Arabia as an energy consultant.
 Notice
that we have two ideas in two
independent clauses:


My father installs and designs wind turbines
He travels all over Saudi Arabia as an
energy consultant.
Another Example
 Fashion
shows in the clothes we wear, it is
constantly changing and repeating itself
although fashion in the form of haute
couture is everywhere, it isn’t for
everyone.
Separation of Clauses

This sentence has four clauses:




Fashion shows in the clothes we wear
(independent – can stand alone as a sentence)
it is constantly changing and repeating itself
(independent – can stand alone as a sentence)
although fashion in the form of haute couture is
everywhere (dependent – cannot stand alone)
it isn’t for everyone (independent)
Fixing a Fused Sentence
 To
fix a fused sentence, determine where
one MAIN IDEA ends and another one
begins.
 In the previous sentence, for example,
there seems to be a logical division
between the words itself and although.
Fixing a Fused Sentence

Although there are other ways to correct a
fused sentence, the two most obvious are:
1.
Placing a period between the two main
ideas.

Revision: Fashion shows in the clothes we
wear, and it is constantly changing and
repeating itself. Although fashion in the form
of haute couture is everywhere, it isn’t for
everyone.
Fixing a Fused Sentence
2.
Placing a semicolon between the two
main ideas.
 Revision:
Fashion shows in the clothes we
wear, and it is constantly changing and
repeating itself; although fashion in the
form of haute couture is everywhere, it
isn’t for everyone.
Fused Sentence Practice
 Janine’s
uncle never graduated from high
school he started his own landscaping
company at sixteen.
 Although
Janine’s uncle never graduated
from high school, he started his own
landscaping company at sixteen.
Fused Sentence Practice
I
have had a Mac computer for a year
already I have no regrets about buying it.
 Although
I have had a Mac computer for
a year already, I have no regrets about
buying it.
Fused Sentence Practice
 People
make their way across the desert
they arrive in trucks with little ventilation,
and they are often beaten by the men
who smuggle them.
 People make their way across the desert.
They arrive in trucks with little ventilation,
and they are often beaten by the men
who smuggle them.
Fused Sentence Practice
 These
political victories add up It’s not just
money, but dignity at home and on the
job.
 These political victories add up; it’s not just
money, but dignity at home and on the
job.
Fused Sentence Practice
 Immigrants
can be sentenced to prison
most are sent back to their native
homelands.
 Immigrants can be sentenced to prison,
but most are sent back to their native
homelands.
LIE vs. LAY
Lie vs. Lay
 Many
native and non-native speakers of
English alike do not understand the
difference between using the word lie
and using the word lay.
Lie vs. Lay

Both lie and lay are verbs, meaning that they
indicate an action of some sort. However, the
verb lie and the verb lay are two absolutely
different words, like rhinoceros and apple.
They are not variants of the same word.

If we want to use formal grammatical terms
(and we must), the verb lie is "intransitive"; the
verb lay is "transitive."
The Verb Lay
A
"transitive" verb indicates that
something is being done to someone or
something. For example, take a look at
the following sentence:
 Transitive
Verb (lay): Every morning, I lay
the newspaper on the table.
The Verb Lay
I
(the subject) do something to the
newspaper (direct object) every morning.
I lay the newspaper on the table. The
word lay is the verb (in the present tense),
and the noun newspaper is the thing that
something is done to (the direct object).
 Think
of it this way: You have to lay
something.
The Verb Lie
 An
"intransitive" verb, on the other hand,
does not indicate that anything is being
done to anything or anyone. The person
or thing does the action of just lying (NOT
laying) there.
 Intransitive
Verb (lie): In the afternoon, my
dog, Maxi, lies on the living room couch.
The Verb Lie
 Maxi
is not doing anything to anyone or
anything. Maxi is simply lying on the
couch; the verb lie is "intransitive."
 A common error occurs when parents tell
children, incorrectly, to "lay" down. Sadly,
the children grow up thinking that this use
of lay is correct, thus perpetuating the
cycle of misuse.
Correct Usage
 Incorrect: Scott,
I want you to lay down
this minute or you have a time out.
 Correct:
Scott, I want you to lie down this
minute or you have a time out.
Why is this Confusing?




People do not confuse the words rhinoceros
and apple, so why do people confuse the
verbs lie and lay?
Well, both words start with the letter "L" and
are made up of three letters. And they both
mean similar things.
After all, if you LAY an apple on the table, the
apple LIES on the table.
And if you LAY a rhinoceros,... Well, let's just
not go there.
Forms of Lie
 Lie



(to stretch out, recline)
Past Tense = Lay
Past Participle = Lain
Present Participle = Lying
Forms of Lay
 Lay



(to place, to put)
Past Tense = Laid
Past Participle = Laid
Present Participle = Laying
Correct Examples of Lie
 Jerry
lies on the bed every day after
school.
 The dog just lay on the rug as the burglars
ransacked the house.
 That apple has lain on the table for two
days now.
 Roberta is lying on the recliner in the
family room.
Correct Examples of Lay
 Jerry
lays his head on the pillow when he
lies in bed.
 Susan laid her books down when she
walked through the door.
 The contractors have laid the tile in the
kitchen.
 The President is laying the foundation for
comprehensive health reform.
Lay vs. Lie Practice
Mrs. Khan (lies, lays) an
eraser on her desk as soon as
she enters the room.
Possible Answers:
A) Lies
B) Lays
Lay vs. Lie Practice
When Kieran saw the beach,
he thought he had (lain, laid)
his eyes on paradise.
Possible Answers:
A) Lain
B) Laid
Lay vs. Lie Practice
Lester likes to (lie, lay) in his
room for about an hour after
he wakes up.
Possible Answers:
A) Lie
B) Lay
Lay vs. Lie Practice
The dog (lies, lays) her paws
all over the furniture when we
go out.
Possible Answers:
A) Lies
B) Lays
Lay vs. Lie Practice
This clay pot has (lain, laid) in
the underground cave for
thousands of years.
Possible Answers:
A) Lain
B) Laid
Lay vs. Lie Practice
Uday, please (lie, lay) down
before you faint from
exhaustion!
Possible Answers:
A) Lie
B) Lay
Lay vs. Lie Practice
The factory will dismiss
employees if they (lie, lay)
down on the job.
Possible Answers:
A) Lie
B) Lay
Lay vs. Lie Practice
The factory will dismiss
employees if they (lie, lay)
down their tools.
Possible Answers:
A) Lie
B) Lay
Lay vs. Lie Practice
When farmers harvest
mangoes, they must (lie, lay)
mulch so that the harvest
trucks have proper traction.
Possible Answers:
A) Lie
B) Lay
Lay vs. Lie Practice
EMX has (lain, laid) aside its
prejudices and will consider all
applicants, regardless of
background.
Possible Answers:
A) Lain
B) Laid
Lay vs. Lie Practice
The goat enjoys (lying, laying)
on the haystack in the
afternoon.
Possible Answers:
A) Lying
B) Laying
NOMINALIZATIONS
Nominalization
 Definition
- A sentence may seem unclear
to a reader because verbs and adjectives
(words that describe nouns) are turned
into nouns.
Avoid Turning Verbs to Nouns
A
re-examination of the evidence led
prosecutors to a reconsideration of the
defendant’s guilt.
 Prosecutors
re-examined the evidence
and reconsidered the defendant’s guilt.
 Most
readers would say that the second
sentence is clearer than the first.
An Examination
 The
words re-examination and
reconsideration are nouns. Generally,
words that end in tion are nouns.
 The
verb forms, re-examined and
reconsidered, seem clearer to most
readers.
More Nominalizations
The following table lists just a very few nominalizations and their corresponding verb forms.
Nominalization
Verb Form
Analysis
Analyze
Belief
Believe
Comparison
Compare
Conclusion
Conclude
Determination
Determine
Failure
Fail
Reaction
React
Suggestion
Suggest
Overall
 In
general, choose the verb form over the
nominalization.
 Be
careful, though. Some nominalizations
are useful and necessary. Use them
prudently.
Adjectives and Nouns

The same principle applies with adjectives.
Avoid turning an adjective, such as careless,
into its corresponding nominalization,
carelessness.

Avoid: His carelessness in driving caused a
multi-car accident.

Prefer: His careless driving caused a multi-car
accident.
Adjective Nominalizations
Nominalization
Adjective Form
Carelessness
Careless
Difficulty
Difficult
Intensity
Intense
Nominalization Practice
 The
steering committee raised an
objection to the proposed parking
garage north of the stadium.
Explanation

How many words are in this sentence?


What words end in “tion” or “cion?”


Objection
Is there a verb equivalent?


15
Object
Rewrite the sentence with the agent as the
subject thereby reducing the words to 13.

Remember “LESS IS MORE”
Without Nominalizations
 The
steering committee objected to the
proposed parking garage north of the
stadium.
Nominalization Practice

When the faculty senate has made a
determination about the desirability of a
lecture series, a proposal will be presented to
the chancellor.


(Hint. Perhaps we have ONE useful
nominalization.)
When the faculty senate determines the
desirability of a lecture series, it will propose
the idea to the chancellor.
Nominalization Practice
 Negligence
on the part of hospital
workers was the reason for the failure of
the kidney machine.
 Negligent
hospital workers broke the
kidney machine.
Nominalization Practice
 Mercy
Hospital made a decision to
expand its geriatric facilities.
 Mercy
Hospital decided to expand its
geriatric facilities.
Nominalization Practice
 It
was the intention of the screening
committee to interview all candidates
face to face.
 The
screening committee intended to
interview all candidates face to face.
Nominalization Practice

The investor made an incorrect assumption
about the volatility of Brazil’s emerging
economy.


Some information might be missing in the
original sentence. Did the investor think that the
volatility of Brazil’s emerging economy was high
or low? How can the meaning be made
clearer?
The investor incorrectly assumed the high
volatility of Brazil’s emerging economy.
Nominalization Practice
 The
parole board did not give an
explanation for the early release of such a
dangerous inmate.
 The
parole board did not explain the early
release of such a dangerous inmate.
Nominalization Practice
 It
I
is my hope that you apply this material.
hope that you apply this material.
PARALLELISM
Parallelism
A
sentence exhibits parallelism if similar
ideas are expressed using the same
syntactic and grammatical structure.
 Writers
use parallel structures to
communicate ideas that have the same
importance using the same grammatical
structure.
Parallelism
 Parallelism
is most common using gerund
phrases (verb + ing) or infinitives (to +
verb).
 Faulty
parallelism occurs when writers do
not use a parallel structure to
communicate a series of ideas.
Faulty Parallelism
 Faulty

Parallelism:
Without good pitching, the Marlins can be
expected to lose more than eighty games,
to draft early in next year’s draft, and
attendance will suffer greatly.
Faulty Parallelism
 What
are the ideas that seem to have the
same importance?



The Marlins will lose more than eighty
games
The Marlins will draft early in next year’s
draft.
The Marlins’ attendance will suffer greatly.
Correct Parallelism
 Correct
Parallelism: Without good
pitching, the Marlins can be expected to
lose more than eighty games, to draft
early in next year’s draft, and to suffer
greatly in attendance.
Correlative Conjunctions

The term parallelism also applies to using
correlative conjunctions and comparisons
properly.

Correlative Conjunctions: both, and; not, but; not
only, but also; either, or; whether, or; neither, nor.

These conjunctions connect words, phrases, and
clauses that have the same level of meaning in
the same sentence. Use the same grammatical
structure with both elements of the correlative.
Correlative Conjunctions
 Faulty
Parallelism:
Andrew was both
an industrious student, and he was also an
excellent athlete.
 Correct
Parallelism: Andrew was both
an industrious student and an excellent
athlete.
Comparisons
 Use
a parallel structure when you connect
two words, phrases, or clauses with a
comparison word, including than or as.
 Faulty
Parallelism: Sharon’s grade point
average is much higher than her brother.
Comparisons
 Correct
Parallelism: Sharon’s grade
point average is much higher than her
brother’s (grade point average).
 Correct
Parallelism: Sharon has a higher
grade point average than her brother
(does).
Parallelism Practice
 We
debated between two options
immigration had given us: going back to
Nicaragua or to stay in the US with no
hope of ever returning.
 We
debated between two options
immigration had given us: going back to
Nicaragua or staying in the US with no
hope of ever returning.
Parallelism Practice
 My
uncle Julius likes bagels, lox, and
eating chicken salad.
 My
uncle Julius likes eating bagels, lox,
and chicken salad.
Parallelism Practice
 Bill
not only runs five miles every day, he
consumes eight thousand calories.
 Bill
not only runs five miles every day, but
he also consumes eight thousand
calories.
Parallelism Practice
 Jose’s
daughter will either attend Harvard,
or she plans to go to the Stanford.
 Jose’s
daughter will either attend Harvard,
or Stanford.
Parallelism Practice
 The
principal is excited about both the
swim team earning national honors, and
that the debate team won its first
tournament.
 The
principal is excited about both the
swim team earning national honors and
the debate team winning its first
tournament.
Parallelism Practice
 Fatima’s
knowledge of accounting is
greater than Farah.
 Fatima’s
knowledge of accounting is
greater than Farah’s.
Parallelism Practice
 Miranda’s
flowers are neither red, nor are
they orange.
 Miranda’s
orange.
flowers are neither red nor
PERSISTENT POINT OF VIEW
Point of View

Mixed Point of View: We were slowly getting
closer to our destination, but you could see
that everyone was getting frustrated.

This sentence has a mixed point of view. The
pronoun We is 1st person plural; the pronoun
you is 2nd person; and if we really want to get
fanatical, the pronoun everyone is 3rd person
singular.
Point of View
Definition: Point of view refers to the
perspective from which the sentence is told.
When we discuss point of view, we use a
term called “person,” meaning “who (or
what) is the focus of the sentence.”
In English grammar we have three persons,
1st person, 2nd person, and 3rd person.
Consistent Point of View
 Consistent
1st Person Point of View: We
were slowly getting closer to our
destination, but we could see that we
were getting frustrated.
 Consistent
3rd Person Point of View: The
Gomezes were slowly getting closer to
their destination, but they could see that
they were all getting frustrated.
Reword the Sentence

These sentences may be consistent, but
sometimes a rewording of the sentence may
improve readability. For example,


The Gomezes were slowly getting closer to their
destination, but they were getting frustrated.
This revision cuts four words and improves the
flow of the sentence. Many times, this type of
revision improves the readability of a
sentence more than merely focusing on point
of view.
Point of View Practice
 The
author suggests that the truth is
sometimes painful, but telling the truth is
better than living a life being someone
you are not.
 The
author suggests that the truth is
sometimes painful, but telling the truth is
better than living a lie.
Point of View Practice
 When
Margo married a widower her life
became complicated because you can’t
help but feel jealous about a deceased
wife.
 When
Margo married a widower her life
became complicated because she can’t
help but feel jealous about his deceased
wife.
Point of View Practice
 Although
it may be painful for a parent
not to be your child’s role model, Patrice
Grant doesn’t have the right to be angry
with her son’s choice.
 Although
it may be painful for parents not
to be their children’s role model, Patrice
Grant doesn’t have the right to be angry
with her son’s choice.
Point of View Practice
 As
the soldiers marched away from the
battleground, you felt as if the war may
finally be over.
 As
the soldiers marched away from the
battleground, the nation felt as if the war
may finally be over.
Point of View Practice
A
softball player who wants to develop
her pitching form knows you will develop
more skills at a sleep away camp.
A
softball player who wants to develop
her pitching form knows she will develop
more skills at a sleep away camp.
Point of View Practice

Students underestimate the amount of time
required to study nursing because you simply
cannot pass your tests without extensive study
and practical experience.

Students underestimate the amount of time
required to study nursing because most
students simply cannot pass their tests without
extensive study and practical experience.
Point of View Practice
 Regardless
of how much teachers try, you
cannot make sure that students attend
every class.
 Regardless
of how much teachers try,
they cannot make sure that students
attend every class.
Point of View Practice
 When
 When
I ran, you would get cramps.
people run, they sometimes get
cramps.
PRONOUN / ANTECEDENT
AGREEMENT
Pronoun / Antecedent
Agreement
 Here
we tackle the sticky question of
agreement between a pronoun and its
antecedent.
 What do antecedent and agreement
mean?
 An antecedent is a word that comes
before something.
 The root ante, meaning “before,” gives
you a clue.
Agreement and Number
 In
English grammar we have a term called
number, and, unlike number in math,
number in grammar means one of two
things:


singular (only one)
plural (more than one).
Agreement and Number
 When
your English teacher says, “A
pronoun must agree in number with its
antecedent,” you know what he’s saying:
 If you use a singular noun or pronoun, you
have to use a singular pronoun to refer to
the original. You can’t (you’re not
supposed to!) use a plural one.
Correct Agreement
 Correct:
 The
Students lost their privileges.
original noun is Students, which is
plural; the possessive pronoun, their, refers
(or points back) to Students. The word
Students is the antecedent, and both
Students and their are plural in number.
No problem here.
Incorrect Agreement
 Wrong:
 This
Everyone who went on the field
trip was supposed to bring their
permission form.
sentence may look right, but look
again.
 The pronoun their is plural. However, it
refers to the pronoun everyone, which is
singular.
Singular Words
Certain words are ALWAYS singular, even though
they may seem plural.
Anybody
Each
Everybody
Somebody
Someone
Fixing the Problem


How do We Fix the Problem?
We could (but don’t!) simply use the pronoun
his or her, as in:



Poor: Everyone who went on the field trip was
supposed to bring his permission form.
But unless you’re talking about all boys, you
should not use his.
Could you use his or her? Yes, but that sounds
too clunky, too heavy and awkward.
Solution
 Your
best solution is to rewrite the
sentence and turn singular nouns into
plurals.
 That way you are grammatically correct
and you do not use sexist or clunky
language.
 Better: Students who went on the field trip
were supposed to bring their permission
form.
Omit the Pronoun

We can also rewrite the sentence omitting the
pronoun.

Better: Everyone who went on the field trip
was supposed to bring a permission form.

Each method works. If you have enough
creativity, sentences can be written in many
different ways. Some ways work better than
others.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 Would
everyone please bring their
computer to the writing workshop?
 Would
everyone please bring a computer
to the writing workshop?
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 The
principal indicated that every staff
member had to submit their self
evaluation by Wednesday.
 The
principal indicated that every staff
member had to submit a self evaluation
by Wednesday.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 The
operations officer noted that every
soldier should have their own blanket.
 The
operations officer noted that soldiers
should have their own blankets.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 School
psychologists note the importance
for every student to express their
emotions.
 School
psychologists note the importance
for every student to express emotions.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 Is
every candidate for the position going
to be given their application materials at
the interview?
 Is
every candidate for the position going
to be given application materials at the
interview?
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 If
any investor has a question about the
quarterly reports, they should contact
their broker directly.
 If
investors have questions about the
quarterly reports, they should contact
their brokers directly.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 If
every customer complains that an item
is missing in their order, something is wrong
with our procedure.
 If
customers complain that an item is
missing in their order, something is wrong
with our procedure.
Pronoun/Antecedent Practice
 Would
everyone who attended the
meeting, please bring their tee shirt to the
rally?
 Would
everyone who attended the
meeting, please bring a tee shirt to the
rally?
SENTENCE FRAGMENTS
Sentence Fragment
 Definition:
A sentence fragment is a piece
of a sentence. A piece is not whole or
complete. In a formal sense, a sentence
fragment is a group of words that is
punctuated as a sentence but that
cannot stand alone as a sentence.
Sentence Fragment

Here's an example:


Sentence Fragment: The paper on the desk.
This is an easy one. The paper on the desk. What
about the paper on the desk? This group of words
starts with a capital letter and ends in a period. It is
punctuated as a sentence, but it is not a sentence.
This group of words is missing a verb or a verb phrase.

Complete Sentence: The paper on the desk fell to the
floor.
How do you fix a fragment?
 Add
a verb or verb phrase
 FRAGMENT:
hillside.
 COMPLETE
The cows grazing on the
SENTENCE: The cows were
grazing on the hillside.
How do you fix a fragment?

Attach the sentence fragment to the sentence
before it or after it.

FRAGMENT: Rivers cut deep canyons in the
landscape. Weaving their way hundreds of miles
through forests and mountains until they reach the
ocean.

COMPLETE SENTENCE: Rivers cut deep canyons in
the landscape, weaving their way hundreds of
miles through forests and mountains until they
reach the ocean.
How do you fix a fragment?

Use a conjunctive adverb (however, therefore)
instead of a subordinating conjunction (although,
because, since).

FRAGMENT: Jason never thought he could play
baseball. Although, he eventually worked hard
and started for his high school team.

COMPLETE SENTENCE: Jason never thought he
could play baseball. However, he eventually
worked hard and started for his high school team.
How do you fix a fragment?

Attach a clause with a relative pronoun (who,
whom, that, which, whose) to the sentence it
belongs to.

FRAGMENT: Mom always asked me to walk
the dog. Who never had to go out anyway.

COMPLETE SENTENCE: Mom always asked me
to walk the dog, who never had to go out
anyway.
How do you fix a fragment?

Attach a verb phrase that is punctuated as a
sentence (the fragment) to the sentence it
belongs to.

FRAGMENT: The psychologist met with his clients in
a relaxing environment. And encouraged them to
meditate after the session.

COMPLETE SENTENCE: James counseled his clients
in a relaxing environment and encouraged them
to meditate after the session.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 Salt-water
fish can be very colorful. For
example, Parrot Fish.
 Salt-water
fish can be very colorful. Take,
for example, Parrot Fish.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 Merwin
passed the exam. Although, he
got the last five questions wrong.
 Although
Merwin got the last five
questions wrong, he passed the exam.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 Robert
has met his long-lost daughter.
Who had been searching for him over
twenty years.
 Robert
has met his long-lost daughter who
had been searching for him over twenty
years.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 Because
the cities on the west coast of
Florida receive cool breezes and warm
water from the Gulf of Mexico.
 The
cities on the west coast of Florida
receive cool breezes and warm water
from the Gulf of Mexico.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 Jenny
never finished high school. Despite
the fact that her parents were supportive
and allowed her to stay at home after her
arrest.
 Jenny
never finished high school despite
the fact that her parents were supportive
and allowed her to stay at home after her
arrest.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 The
conductor finished with a flourish.
Waving his baton and gesticulating wildly
with his free hand.
 The
conductor finished with a flourish,
waving his baton and gesticulating wildly
with his free hand.
Sentence Fragments Practice
 The
house survived the tornado. Which
clearly demonstrated that the building
and zoning codes were sufficiently strict.
 The
house survived the tornado, which
clearly demonstrated that the building
and zoning codes were sufficiently strict.
STRONG AUTHORIAL VOICE
Strong Authorial Voice
This lesson discusses techniques for
communicating your opinion in what we
call a strong authorial voice.
 This means that when you write, you
should establish your position as the
author and call on the reader to accept
your credibility.

Strong Authorial Voice
 Let’s
bring the abstraction down to an
example.
 Weak Authorial Voice: In my opinion,
pedestrians should not cross the street
when they have a red light.
 Strong Authorial Voice: Pedestrians should
not cross the street when they have a red
light.
Strong Authorial Voice
If you are writing an essay or report about
traffic problems, readers know that YOU
are the author, no one else.
 The phrase “In my opinion” takes away
from the strength of your writing. It fills
space without adding any content and,
in fact, diminishes your credibility as a
writer.

Strong Authorial Voice
Certain phrases or expressions appear in our writing
frequently, and all they do is clutter up the space and take
away from the message.
In my opinion
It is my belief
I believe
I feel
My belief
My thoughts on
It seems to me
It is my understanding I think
When you give your thoughts, beliefs, feelings, or opinions
about a subject, you generally do not have to specify that
those thoughts, beliefs, feelings, or opinions are yours.
Attribution is Sometimes Necessary
 There
are times when you write a letter,
essay, report, or some other document
where you discuss the beliefs or opinions
of different people or organizations.
 In
these cases, make sure you attribute
(give credit to) the opinion to that
particular source.
Where Attribution is Necessary
 Example:
“Derek Bok argues that first
amendment rights outweigh any
concerns for offending the public’s
sensibilities, while Juliet Tabor contends
that the risk of offending large segments
of the population must be considered in
determining what a newspaper should
print.”
Where Attribution is Necessary

If you follow this sentence with an opinion of your own, you
do not need to attribute it to yourself. Own the opinion as
yours and state it strongly.

Weak Authorial Voice: It seems to me that Juliet Tabor fails
to take into account the spirit of hard-earned democratic
freedoms by promoting censorship based on public
perception.

Strong Authorial Voice: Juliet Tabor fails to take into
account the spirit of hard-earned democratic freedoms by
promoting censorship based on public perception.
Not only is the strong sentence shorter by five words (always
a good thing), it carries the voice of authority and
conviction.

Advice
Write with authority and conviction.
Strong Voice Practice
I
think that what this mother is trying to
explain makes perfect sense.

What this mother is trying to explain
makes perfect sense.
Strong Voice Practice
 It
is my understanding that most men feel
a bit emasculated when asked or forced
to help complete tasks other than those
classified acceptable by other men.

Most men feel a bit emasculated when
asked or forced to help complete tasks
other than those classified acceptable by
other men.
Strong Voice Practice
I
strongly believe that high schools should
do something about the harassment of
students who are different from most
other students.
 High
schools should do something about
the harassment of students who are
different from most other students.
Strong Voice Practice
I
think Blomfield is incorrect in implying
that people are judgmental if a man is
unable to support his family due to
unemployment.
 Blomfield
is incorrect in implying that
people are judgmental if a man is unable
to support his family due to
unemployment.
Strong Voice Practice
 In
my opinion as I read Paturel’s article, it
seemed as if Paturel was the one who
really needed to make peace with
Brandon’s first marriage.
 It
seemed as if Paturel was the one who
really needed to make peace with
Brandon’s first marriage.
Strong Voice Practice

Although people tend to feel they have to
measure up to someone else’s level to be
accepted, I think people should just be
themselves if they really want to be
accepted.

Although people tend to feel they have to
measure up to someone else’s level to be
accepted, people should just be themselves if
they really want to be accepted.
Strong Voice Practice
I
think that in our day and age that
unemployment is a very common theme
in America.
 In
our day and age, unemployment is a
very common theme in America.
STRONG VERBS
Strong Verbs
 This
lesson confronts a writing problem
that may go undetected.
 Although readers may not notice the
problem, it still affects how they perceive
your writing.
Weak Verbs vs Strong Verbs

Weaker: The philanthropist is careful to give
only to organizations that have low
administrative costs.

Stronger: The philanthropist gives only to
organizations with low administrative costs.

Do the sentences mean exactly the same
thing? No. There is a subtle difference.
Weak Verbs vs Strong Verbs
 The
first sentence underscores the care
with which the philanthropist gives.
 However, unless you mean to emphasize
this care, the second sentence conveys
the message more strongly than the first.
 The second sentence is also shorter by
four words. Shorter is usually better.
Weak Verbs vs Strong Verbs



Weaker: William was late to the meeting.
Stronger: William arrived late to the meeting.
These two sentences use the same number of
words, six. However, note how the verb in the
second sentence, arrived, sounds more
vigorous, describes the act of attending the
meeting more clearly, than the verb in the
first, was, which merely describes a state of
being.
What to Avoid
 The
main culprits include the verbs “to be”
and “to have.”
 These verbs may hide in the forms listed
below.
 Any time you use one of these verbs (Be,
Is, Are, Was, Been, Being, Were, Has,
Have, Having, Had) ask yourself if the
sentence should be rewritten.
Rewriting Sentences
To rewrite sentences using strong verbs:
 1. Underline any use of Be, Is, Are, Was,
Been, Being, Were, Has, Have, Having,
Had.
 2. Look for a noun or adjective that you
can convert to a strong verb.
 3. Rewrite the sentence using that strong
verb.

Example
 1.John
is the manager of the produce
department.
 2.
John is the manager of the produce
department. (noun – predicate
nominative)
 3.
John manages the produce
department.
Strong Verb Practice
 Janet
Smith is the supervisor of the
customer service department.
 Janet
Smith supervises the customer
service department.
Strong Verb Practice

Walt Disney was the initiator of a mass
movement in family entertainment.
 Walt
Disney initiated a mass movement in
family entertainment.
Strong Verb Practice
 Jenny
Millhouse is the owner of two gas
stations in Florida City.
 Jenny
Millhouse owns two gas stations in
Florida City.
Strong Verb Practice
 The
sugar cane refinery is the employer
that is the driving force for employment in
south central Florida.
 The
sugar cane refinery drives
employment in south central Florida.
Strong Verb Practice
 The
shipped product was different from
the one that was advertised in the
catalog.
 The
shipped product differed from the
one advertised in the catalog.
Strong Verb Practice
 The
Foster family has a fruit stand near
Krome Avenue.
 The
Foster family owns a fruit stand near
Krome Avenue.
Strong Verb Practice
 After
a questionable call at home plate,
the manager had an argument with the
umpire.
 After
a questionable call at home plate,
the manager argued with the umpire.
SUBJECT/VERB AGREEMENT
Subject/Verb Agreement




Every sentence has a subject and a verb.
They must agree.
A singular subject requires a singular verb
form, while a plural subject requires a plural
verb form.
Subject-Verb agreement is simple, in principle,
but it is not always easy to carry out in
speaking and writing.
Three verbs, in particular, often confuse
students: to be, to have, and to do.
Number, Person, and Tense
 Number:
English is simple, in a sense.
When we refer to “number” in English, we
mean only one of two things:
 singular
(only one)
 plural (more than one.
 That’s
it. There are only two “numbers” in
English: “one” and “more than one.”
Number, Person, and Tense
 Person:
We have three “persons” (not
people):
 First person (1st person) refers to the
person or group speaking (“I” or “we”).
 Second person refers to the person (or
people) being spoken to (you).
 Third person refers to the people or thing
that is being written about (when it is not
“I” or “me”).
Number, Person, and Tense
 Tense:
There are many tenses in English,
but we will examine two basic tenses:


present (the current moment)
past (before the current moment).
The Verb “To Be” (was, were)
The different forms of the verb “to be” are
Singular
Plural
Present Tense
I am
We are
Past Tense
I was
We were
You are
You are
You were
You were
He, She, It is
They are
He, She, It was
They were
1st Person
2nd Person
Present Tense
Past Tense
3rd Person
Present Tense
Past Tense
The Verb “To Be”

Error: Mrs. Adams and Margaret was standing
next to the train station when the sheriff
arrived.

“Mrs. Adams and Margaret” is the subject of
the verb “to be.” The subject is more than
one (plural), so the correct form should be
“Mrs. Adams and Margaret were standing
next to the train station when the sheriff
arrived.”
The Verb “To Be”

Error: Because eleven students is always late
for class, the principal decided to eliminate
spirit week.

“Eleven students” is the subject of the verb “to
be.” The subject is more than one (plural) so
the correct form should be “Because eleven
students are always late for class, the
principal decided to eliminate spirit week.”
The Verb “To Be”
 As
A Helping Verb: The rules of subjectverb agreement also apply when the
verb “to be” is used as a helping verb, as
in “were running” or “was baking.”
The Verb “To Have” (has, had)
The different forms of the verb “to have” are
Singular
Plural
I have
We have
I had
We had
You have
You have
You had
You had
Present Tense
He, She, It has
They have
Past Tense
He, She, It had
They had
1st Person
Present Tense
Past Tense
2nd Person
Present Tense
Past Tense
3rd Person
The Verb “To Have” (has, had)

Error: The Robertson Company have a
legitimate complaint about the zoning
regulations that were just passed.

“The Robertson Company” is the subject of
the verb “to have”; it is singular and 3rd
person. Therefore, the correct form should be
“The Robertson Company has a legitimate
complaint about the zoning regulations that
were just passed.”
The Verb “To Have” (has, had)
 Error:
When Karina and Marie has the
time, they would like to travel to Greece.
 “Karina
and Marie” is the subject of the
verb “to have”; it is plural and in the 3rd
person. Therefore, the correct form
should be “When Karina and Marie have
the time, they would like to travel to
Greece.”
The Verb “To Do” (do, does)
The different forms of the verb “to do” are
Singular
Plural
Present Tense
I do
We do
Past Tense
I did
We did
Present Tense
You do
You do
Past Tense
You did
You did
He, She, It does
They do
He, She, It did
They did
1st Person
2nd Person
3rd Person
Present Tense
Past Tense
The Verb “To Do” (do, does)
 Error:
Yesenia and Jorge does the
catering for the Elk’s lodge in Peoria.
 “Yesenia
and Jorge” is the subject of the
verb “to do”; it is 3rd person and plural.
Therefore, the correct form should be
“Yesenia and Jorge do the catering for
the Elk’s lodge in Peoria.”
WHO vs. WHOM
Who vs. Whom

People are so mystified (confused) about the
use of who and whom that some of us are
tempted to throw our hands in the air and
say, “it just doesn’t matter.” But it does
matter. Those who know (and not just English
teachers), judge those who misuse it.

Not using who and whom correctly can cost
you, not just in school, but also in life.
Who and Whom are Pronouns

That’s right; who and whom are pronouns.
And if you recall, a pronoun is a word that
takes the place of a noun.

We would not say, “Jesse doesn’t like the
principal Ms. Thomas was hired at his school.”
The name Ms. Thomas is a noun. For this
sentence to flow, we would write, “Jesse
doesn’t like the principal who was hired at his
school.”
It All Depends on Case

In English grammar,
we have a term
called case, which
refers to pronouns.
The case of a
pronoun can be
either subject or
object, depending
on its use in a
sentence. Take a
look at this table.
Subject
Object
I
me
he
him
she
her
we
us
they
them
who
whom
The pronoun who is used as a subject; whom is used as an object.
Correct Usage
 Who
used correctly: Janice is the student
who has read the most books.
 Whom
used correctly: Janice is the
student whom the teachers picked as
outstanding.
Correct Usage
 How
do you determine which to use?
 Break
the sentence into two parts:
 Janice
is the student. She (Janice) has
read the most books.
 Janice
is the student. The teachers picked
her (Janice) as outstanding.
Correct Usage
 If
you use I, he, she, we, or they, then the
correct form is who.
 If
you use me, him, her, us, or them, then
the correct form is whom.
Rule of Thumb
 Generally,
if you can omit the who/whom
entirely, the correct form is whom. If you
need it, then it’s who.
 Example:
Janice is the student the
teachers picked as outstanding.

Sentence makes sense without the
who/whom structure, so the correct form is
whom.)
What About Questions?

For questions, turn the question into a
statement and follow the previous suggestion.

Example: (Who, Whom) should I invite to the
dance?
I should invite – her – to the dance.


When you turn the question into a statement,
you use the pronoun her, so whom is correct.
What About Questions?
 Example:
(Who, Whom) is the president of
student government?
 She
is the president of student
government.
 Again,
when you turn the question into a
statement, you use she, so who is correct.
Prepositions

Always use whom as the object of a
preposition.

Example: I don’t know to (who, whom) I
should send the package.

The correct form is whom because whom is
the object of the preposition to. In 99% of the
cases, the correct form after a preposition is
whom.
Who vs. Whom Practice
 (Who,
Whom) did Mom invite to Marcela’s
birthday party?
 Whom
Who vs. Whom Practice
 Any
man's death diminishes me, because
I am involved in mankind, and therefore
never send to know for (who, whom) the
bells tolls; it tolls for thee. (John Donne)
 whom
Who vs. Whom Practice
 (Who,
Whom) invited Richard to be the
representative for the entire class?
 Who
Who vs. Whom Practice
 Susan
is the chef (who, whom) will create
an exquisite menu for our ten-year
reunion.
 who
THE END