Transcript A First Look at Interpersonal Relationships

Communication and Identity:
Creating and Presenting the Self
Chapter Summary
•Communication and the Self-Concept
•Biological and Social Roots of the Self
•Characteristics of the Self-Concept
•Influences on Identity
•Presenting the Self
•Public and Private
•Characteristics of Identity Management
Looking Out, Looking In
12th Edition
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Who are you?
• Write several aspects of who you
think you are?
• What do you view as what is most
important?
• Describe it as “roles” if you are
having a hard time thinking of many.
• You will now complete (individually)
the Invitation to Insight on Page 47
in your text.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
The Self-Concept
•A relatively stable set of perceptions you hold about
yourself
•Not only your physical self but your emotional states, talents,
likes, dislikes, values roles, etc.
•May also be described as whole communities collectively develop
an image of themselves – Football Games, Weddings
•Self-esteem
•Part of your self-concept
•Involves evaluation of self worth
•Described on how you feel about your qualities – “I am glad
I am quiet” or “I am embarrassed about being quiet”
•It all comes down to confidence!! It all comes down to high
self-esteem or low self-esteem.
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Looking Out, Looking In
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Self-Esteem
• People with high self-esteem are
more willing to communicate than
people with low-self-esteem.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
The Self-Concept
People who feel good about themselves will have
positive expectations about how they communicate.
Looking Out, Looking In
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FIGURE 2.1
The Relationship between Self-Esteem and Communication Behavior
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Biology and the Self
•Personality
•You are not born with a self-concept
•You do not have words to describe who you are!
•Your parents/caretakers shape who you are.
•Children Learn What They Live – Pg 50
•Tends to be stable throughout your life
•To a large degree is part of our genetic makeup
•Biology accounts for: extroversion, shyness, assertiveness,
verbal aggression and willingness to communicate.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Socialization and the Self-Concept
•Reflected Appraisal
•Each of us develops a self-concept that reflects the way we
believe others see us.
•Positive and negative evaluations become the mirror by which
we know ourselves.
•Anyone whose opinion you value can leave an imprint.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
• Reflected Appraisal
• We are likely to feel less valuable, lovable, and capable, to the
degree that others have communicated ego busting signals; and
will probably feel good about ourselves to the degree that others
seem to feel good about us.
• Our Self-Concept List - is a product of the positive and negative
messages you have received throughout your life.
• As a child your first communication is ego boosting…this shapes
your self-concept – and lays the foundation of who you will be for
the rest of your lives. Both Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication.
• Are you affectionate/lovable in tone of voice or are you
businesslike?
• Does your tone express love and enjoyment or disappointment
and irritation?
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
• Reflected Appraisal
• All of the previous information shapes a child’s sense of being
“Ok” or “Not OK.”
• Children are VERY “trusting souls” – They have no other was of
viewing themselves – they only know and accept at face value –
what others tell or show them – POSITIVE or negative!
• “Cipher in the Snow” Pg. 54-55
• How do you arrive at your opinion of yourself as: a students/as a
person attractive to others/as a competent worker??
• During childhood and adolescence all of these views are powerful
and shape who you are! Whether you believe so or not!!
• The influence of significant others becomes less powerful as
people grow older. As people approach 30 their self-concept
doesn’t usually change radically without psychotherapy.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Socialization and the Self-Concept
•Social Comparison
•Evaluating ourselves in terms of how we compare to others
•We decide if we are Superior or Inferior
•“Attractive or Ugly,” “Success or Failure,” “Intelligent or Stupid”
•These comparisons positively or negatively affect our selfconcept.
•Social comparison can be dangerous.
•Reference groups play an important role. i.e. Hollywood Star,
Donald Trump, Professional Athlete or Artist?? Is it an
appropriate comparison?
•It depends on who we compare ourselves to….
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
• Many people judge themselves against
unreasonable standards and suffer
(internally) accordingly!
• Distorted self-images can lead to serious
behavioral disorders such as depression,
anorexia, bulimia, etc.
• Social comparisons provide a way to
decide if we are the same or different
from others.
• Child who likes ballet – Pg. 52
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
• Reference Groups
• Argue – tall/short, speak with an accent, have
acne, etc. But it is the significance we attach
to them that depends greatly on the opinions
of others!!
• If you have held a poor self-image in the past
it is not a reason for continuing to do so in the
future.
• YOU CAN CHANGE your attitudes and
behavior!!
• Commit to make one positive change TODAY!
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Characteristics of the Self-Concept
•The self-concept can be subjective.
•A distorted self-evaluation occurs for several reasons:
•Obsolete Information – Past failures don’t mean future failure, it
applies to success also!
•Distorted Feedback – Negative self-image could be caused by
overly critical parents/cruel friends/classmates/uncaring teachers
or even memorable strangers! Too Positive Example!
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A distorted self-evaluation occurs for several reasons:
(Cont.)
• Self-Verification – the tendency to look for people who confirm our selfconcept
• Emphasis on Perfection – Another cause for a strongly negative selfconcept is the emphasis on perfection which is extremely common in
our society.
• It is not wrong to aim at perfection as an ideal. I am merely suggesting only
that achieving this state of perfection is usually not possible, and to expect
that you should do so is a sure ticket to an inaccurate and unnecessarily low
self-esteem.
• Pg. 58 Table 2-1
• Social Expectations – “Perfectionist Society” After a while we begin to
believe the types of statements we repeatedly make.
• It’s alright to proclaim that you’re miserable if you have failed to do well
on a project; but it’s considered boastful to express your pride at a job
well done.
• Self-esteem may be based on inaccurate thinking!! Do you agree?
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Characteristics of the Self-Concept
•Cognitive Conservatism
•The tendency to seek and attend information that conforms with
an existing self-concept.
•The self-concept is resistant to change.
•Inaccurate self-concepts can lead to self-delusion and lack of
growth.
•Inaccuracies are hard to maintain and lead to defensiveness.
•Communicators are reluctant to downgrade a favorable image.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Culture, Gender and Identity
•Culture
•Individualistic vs. Collectivistic
•Self-concept is influenced by culture.
•Different culturally influenced self-concepts can clash.
•In collective societies, there tends to be a higher degree of
communication.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Culture, Gender and Identity
•Sex and gender
•Being male or female shapes the way people communicate with
you.
•Pronouns with gender
•Boys - focus is on size, strength and activity
•Girls - focus is on beauty and sweetness
•What happens when they switch?
•Self-esteem is influenced by gender.
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
The Self-fulfilling Prophecy
The self-fulfilling prophecy occurs when a person’s expectation of an
event, and their subsequent behavior based on those expectations,
make the event more likely to occur.
•The Four Stages
•Holding an expectation
•Behaving in accordance with that expectation
•The expectation coming to pass
•Reinforcing the original expectation
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Types of Self-fulfilling Prophecies
•Self-imposed prophecies
•Your own expectations influence your behavior.
•Thinking that you will fail
•“I’m going to screw this up.” or “It’s not going to work.”
•Prophecies imposed by others
•Others’ expectations influence your behavior.
•All opinions you value can cause this prophecy.
•Pygmalion in the Classroom
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Communication and the
Self-Concept
Changing your Self-concept
•Have a realistic perception of yourself.
•Have realistic expectations.
•Have the will to change.
•Have the skill to change.
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Communication as Identity
Management
Public and Private Selves
•Identity Management
•Each of us has a multitude of identities.
•Perceived Self (private self)
•A reflection of the self-concept
•Presenting Self (public self)
•The way we want others to view us
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Communication as Identity
Management
Characteristics of Identity Management
•We strive to create multiple identities:
•“Helping friend,” “joking office mate,” “loving child”
•Identity Management
•Can be deliberate or unconscious
•Is collaborative
•Varies by situation
•People differ in their degree of identity management.
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Communication as Identity
Management
Why we Manage Identities
•To start and manage relationships
•You may appear charming or confident even if you’re not.
• To gain compliance of others
•How do you dress when you go to work or to traffic court?
•To save other’s face
•You mask your discomfort to save another’s feelings.
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Communication as Identity
Management
How do we Manage Identities
•Face-to-face impression management
•Manner consists of words and non-verbal actions.
•Doctors will change their impression management depending
on which part of the examination they may be doing.
•Appearance shapes impression:
•Clothing, Tattoos, Jewelry, etc.
•Setting also influences how others may view us.
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Communication as Identity
Management
•Computer-Mediated Communication (CMC)
•Slight limitations over other communication
channels
•More control over managing your identity
•CMC also gives individuals the ability to
broadcast their identity in a way traditional
communication can’t:
•MySpace, FaceBook and Friendster
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Communication as Identity
Management
Identity Management and Honesty
•Some manage identity dishonestly:
•Misrepresenting yourself to date
•Job applicants who lie about academic records
•Salespeople who pretend to be dedicated to customer service
• Managing identity does not make you a liar.
•Although seemingly manipulative, it is authentic communication.
•Can you imagine not managing your identities?
Looking Out, Looking In
12th Edition
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Communication and Identity:
Creating and Presenting the Self
Chapter Summary
•Communication and the Self-Concept
•Biological and Social Roots of the Self
•Characteristics of the Self-Concept
•Influences on Identity
•Presenting the Self
•Public and Private
•Characteristics of Identity Management
Looking Out, Looking In
12th Edition
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