Transcript STAAR English II Writing 2011 Released Test

STAAR English Writing 2011
Released Test Questions
Revise and Edit
Set up your answer sheet like the example below.
Revise Part I
Edit Part I
Revise Part II
Edit Part II
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6.
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1.
2.
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4.
5.
6.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
Revise Section 1
• These questions refer to the whole selection. Read
the selection before reading the questions.
• Use your knowledge of essay writing to help you
answer the questions.
Underline or highlight key words and
analyze the question.
1.) Janie does not like the way she
expressed her thesis in sentence 4. Which
of the following should replace sentence 4
to create a more effective and
sophisticated thesis statement?
THINK: Do I need to use a dictionary to look up effective and/or
sophisticated? What do I know about a thesis statement?
What should it tell the reader? What information do I need to
determine whether a thesis is effective or not?
Is it enough to
read sentence 4 or
is it necessary to
reread the entire
paragraph?
1.) Janie does not like the way she expressed her thesis in
sentence 4. Which of the following should replace sentence
4 to create a more effective and sophisticated thesis
statement?
A. Watching commercials is serious business, and people
should be wary of what they allow into their
subconscious minds.
B. Advertisers are busy trying to sell products that you
may or may not have a reason to buy.
C. People shouldn’t be blinded by the flashing lights and
bright colors that the advertising industry uses to make
commercials captivating.
D. As potential consumers, we must be aware of the
propaganda techniques advertisers use to tempt us into
purchasing their products.
2.) The word pondering does not effectively convey
Janie’s meaning in sentence 7. Which of the following
would be the best replacement for pondering?
A touching
B craving
C carrying
D relishing
(6) They’ve just finished a game of volleyball and are reaching
for a refreshing soda. (7) You find yourself pondering the soft
drink featured in the commercial. (8) But before you head to
the store, stop and think twice.
THINK: Do I need to use a dictionary to look up pondering?
Do I need to use the dictionary to look up any of the answer
choices? Are there context clues to help me determine the
meaning Janie’s trying to communicate?
3.)
3.)Janie
Janiewants
wantstototell
tellmore
moreabout
aboutthe
thestatement
statementshe
she
has
hasmade
madeininsentence
sentence9.9.Which
Whichofofthese
theseideas
ideaswould
would
best
best
follow
followand
andthe
support
support
sentence
sentence 9?
Noticequestion
says “best
(9) You’ve just been a victim of the bandwagon technique. ???
SUPPORT”..so
THINK!you
Is and
itlove
enough
to read
sentence
9 or are
A.FOLLOW
Wouldn’t
to
get
on
the
bandwagon?
Underline
or
Highlight
isflipping
it necessary
to reread
the entire
(5)
Imagine
on
the
television
and
seeing
a
B. The
we
advertisers
replacing
have convinced
the
sentence?
you
that
you will
paragraph?
key
words.
group
of
young,
fit
people
on a sunny
beach.
have as much fun as the people
on the
beach(6)if
Revising
the
sentence?
Make
They’ve
just
finished
a
game
of
volleyball
and
are
you drink
the same
brand
of soda.
What
is
the
?
Really
Here
is
Sentence
9 You find
reaching for a refreshing soda. (7)
sure
you
read
carefully
and
(9)
You’ve
just
been
a
victim
of
the
C.yourself
This
means
that
everyone
on
the
beach
should
pondering
the
soft
drink
featured
in the
asking?
bandwagon
technique.
drink
soda.
commercial.
(8)
But
before
youchange
head to theyou
store,
know what kind of
think twice.
(9) You’ve
justtechnique
been a victim
D.stop
Thisand
bandwagon
technique
is one
that
are
making.
Support
oftelevision
the bandwagon
technique.
??? does
and magazine
advertisers
use tonot
persuade people
to buyrepeat!
a certain soft drink.
mean
4.) What is the most effective revision
revision
to make in sentence 15?
(15) From the ad alone you’ll never know or be sure
how good the shoes really are.
(14) You’ve
been led to or
make
this connection
Underline
Highlight
Revisionwhat
does
this
mean?
A.byFrom
the ad alonetechnique
you’ll never
knowashow
the advertising
known
key
words.
Is
it
the
same
changing,
good the
shoes
really
are,
you can’t
sure.
transfer.
(15)
From
the as
ad alone
you’llbenever
What
is the
?never
Really
be
sure
how
good
the
shoes
B.know
Fromorthe
ad
alone
you’ll
know really
how
modifying,
altering,
improving?
good
the
shoes
really
are.
are.
(16)
It’s
also
important
to
keep
in
mind
asking?
Use your dictionary.
thethe
celebrities
endorse
C.that
From
ad alone were
you’llpaid
nevertoknow
how
the
shoes.
good
for sure the shoes really are.
D. No revision is needed in this sentence.
5.)
Janiewould
wouldlike
liketo
tofurther
furtherdevelop
developthe
thefourth
fourthparagraph
paragraph(sentences
(sentences
5.) Janie
19–23). Reread the paragraph carefully. Which detail could best be
added after
aftersentence
sentence2121totoadd
addtotothe
themain
mainidea
ideaofofthis
thisparagraph?
paragraph?
(19) Many other
propaganda
techniques
are evident
THINK!
Parameters?
YES- Paragraph
4. in
today’s commercials.
(20) Some
adsdoes
use that
repetition, hoping
“Further
develop”?
What
(19)
Many
other
propaganda
techniques
are
evident
in
A.that
All of
these
areWhat
known
as propaganda
techniques,
a catchy
jingle
or phrase
will stick
in your
mind andand
mean?
is
the
main
idea?
Re-read
today’s
commercials.
(20) Some
ads
use repetition,
hoping
they
are
evident
in
most
of
the
commercials
you
see
subconsciously
compel you
to buy
a certain
product.
(21)on
the
paragraph.
Which
detail
could
best
that
a catchy
jingle or phrase will stick in your mind and
television
today.
Other ads use emotional words or situations to make you
subconsciously
compel
yousentence
to buy a 21
certain
product.
(21)
be added
after
to add
to
B.have
Emotional
words are
designed
to evoke
emotions
and
strong
feelings
about
a
product
or
service.
?????
Other adsthe
use
emotional
words
or situations
to make you
main
idea
of
this
paragraph?
What
make you feel strongly about something.
(22)
Learn
recognize
the
propaganda
techniques
that are
is to
the
purpose
of the
new sentence?
have
strong
feelings
about
a
product
or
service.
?????
C.used.
The role
of
anbecause
advertiser
is tojingle
convince
you
that you
(23)
Just
a
clever
about
a
product
is
The
new
sentence
should not just
(22)
Learn
to
recognize
the
propaganda
techniques
that
are
will
not
be
able
to
live
without
a
certain
product.
stuck in your
head
doesn’t
makeorthat
product the best one
REPEAT
the
main
idea
other
(23) Just
because
a clever
jingle about
a producttois
D.used.
Still
other
ads
resort
to
snob
appeal,
attempting
to buy. sentences. It should ADD detail.
stuck
in your
make
thatto
product
the best
one
convince
youhead
thatdoesn’t
you will
appear
have more
wealth
to
buy.
What
is the
main
Underline
orTHINK!
a higher
social
status
if idea?
you use
a certainit.product.
Underline or Highlight
key words.
What is the ? Really
asking?
6.) Janie would like to add a sentence to the end of her paper
6.)
Janiebring
would
likeantoeffective
add a sentence
the end
of her
paper
to help
it to
closing. to
Which
of the
following
to
helpbe
bring
to an
effective
would
the itbest
sentence
forclosing.
Janie toWhich
add? of the following
would be the best sentence for Janie to add?
NOTICEWhat
do “ADD
you need
a sentence”to read tois
Underline
or Highlight
groups
have tried
to
determine
many
A.(24)
AsResearch
you know,
commercials
are
obvioushow
attempts
commercial
messages
the
average
American sees in a day.
this
determine
different
which
from
sentence
revising
to influence
those
who participate.
key
words.
What
is
the
(25) Although the number varies widely, most experts
and/or
would
be
replacing
an
effective
ahappily
sentence?
Atof
B. The
jingles
that
celebrities
sing are part
agree
that
few
hundred
would
be a closing?
conservative
? areally
asking?
aestimate.
much
bigger
campaign.
(26)
Commercials
are bigmean?
business, and
it’s
What
least
the
does
final
effective
paragraph?
Do
important
to remember
that advertisers
are well paid
for
C. The
next time
you’re watching
a commercial,
stop
you
need
to
use
the
dictionary?
influencing
viewers.
(27)
Don’t
let yourself
be easily
and think twice.
swayed.
(28)
Be
a
thoughtful
consumer
who
pays
attention
What
should
be
included
in
an
D. In
the
end,
they’re
probably
not
worth
all
to the products, not to just what the jingles andthat
celebrities
much
anyway. closing?
effective
claim.
????
Edit Section 1
• Sentences are independent and the editing generally
affects only one sentence.
• Read the questions first and then go back to the
passage and highlight the sentence referenced in the
question.
• Use your dictionary.
• Eliminate obvious wrong answers.
The next few slides will refresh your edit skills,
and this will increase your chance of success on
the STAAR edit questions.
Clauses & Commas
Independent
Can stand
alone
Dependent
Cannot stand
alone
Clauses & Commas
Dependent ,
Independent
Dependent: After the child is seated
(not a stand alone clause)
Independent: Her mom pushed the swing.
(complete with a subject and verb.)
Combine: if child/dependent (weak) is on the
swing, being pushed by the parent/
independent- a comma(like a swing seat)
is needed.
After the child was seated, her mom pushed
the swing.
Clauses & Commas
Independent + Dependent
Independent: The adult lions lead the way.
(complete with a subject and verb.)
Dependent: followed by the cubs (not a
stand alone clause)
Combine: If the parent leads the way (it’s
strong) and the child follows there’s no
assistance, swing/comma, needed.
The adult lions lead the way followed by the
cubs.
Clauses & Semicolons
Independent
;
Independent
An independent clause is a
complete sentence.
It contains a noun and a
verb.
An independent clause is a
complete sentence; it
contains a noun and a verb.
Clauses, FANBOYS & Commas
Independent , FANBOYS Independent
F or
And
Nor
But
Or
Yet
So
Run-on: Grandma still rides her Harley
motorcycle her toy poodle balances in a
basket between the handlebars.
Solution: Grandma still rides her Harley
motorcycle, and her toy poodle balances in
a basket between the handlebars.
Compound Sentences with FANBOYS
• The teens walked to the park, but it was closed.
• The gentleman did not know where the sound came
from, so he hid behind the tree.
• The cat was happy, and he slept underneath the
bed.
• I believe technology’s impact on society is
beneficial, but I realize not everyone agrees with
me.
• Spring break was wonderful, yet it could have lasted
longer!
Commas with subordinating conjunctions
connect two parts of a sentence that are not equal
Dependent ,
Independent
Because it is raining, we have an umbrella.
Independent + Dependent
We have an umbrella because it is raining.
Then vs Than
Then- transition word
• I will study, then I’ll go to Karen’s house.
Than- comparison
• Vera is more determined than her older sister.
Affect vs Effect
Affect- verb- to influence, to impress, to change
Effect – noun- a result, a consequence
To vs Too vs Two
The preposition to refers to a place, direction, or
position.
To is also used before the verb in an infinitive.
The adverb too means "also" or "excessively."
Two refers to the number 2.
Example: Meg was too tired to walk home. I
was tired, too. The two of us walked to a
phone booth, and I called for a cab.
Their vs There vs They’re
Their is the possessive form of they.
There is an adverb (meaning "at that place") and
a pronoun used to start a sentence.
They're is a contraction of they are.
Example: There are three children in our family.
They're all girls. Two of them are sitting over
there. Their sister is at home.
Commas and Dashes
to Offset the renaming of something (appositive) and
when including extra information
• Ralph, my best friend, attends Saturday lecture.
• My best friend, Ralph, enjoys golf.
• The third book of the series, Mockingjay, is a
page turner.
• Our doctor, whom we visit often, is on vacation.
• English 101, which is required for most students,
is a challenging course.
• I enjoyed Saturday, and the performances
-classical and modern-were enlightening.
Commas and Dashes
to Offset the renaming of something (appositive) and
when including extra information
• Ralph, my best friend, attends Saturday lecture.
• My best friend, Ralph, enjoys golf.
• The third book of the series, Mockingjay, is a
page turner.
• Our doctor, whom we visit often, is on vacation.
• English 101, which is required for most students,
is a challenging course.
• I enjoyed Saturday, and the performancesclassical and modern-were enlightening.
Apostrophe
Contractions
• don't = do not
• I'm = I am
• he'll = he will
• who's = who is
• shouldn't = should not
• didn't = did not
• could've= could have
’
Ownership
Singular-one person
• Ted’s phone (phone of Ted)
• Karen’s purse (purse of Karen)
Plural-more than one person
• Two cats’ toys (toys of two cats)
• Three friends’ letters (letters of
three friends)
• Children’s food (food of children)
• Five days’ journey (journey of
five days)
Verb Tenses
•
•
•
•
•
•
Present Tense- I play football in the backyard.
Past Tense- I played football in the backyard yesterday.
Future Tense- I will play football in the tomorrow.
Present Perfect Tense- I have played football.
Past Perfect Tense- I had played football.
Future Perfect Tense- I will have played football.
Punctuating “Quotes”
Rule 1: Periods and commas always go inside quotation marks.
Examples:
• The sign changed from "Walk," to "Don't Walk," to "Walk" again
within 30 seconds.
• She said, "Hurry up."
Rule 2: The placement of question marks with quotes follows logic. If a
question is in quotation marks, the question mark should be placed
inside the quotation marks.
Examples:
• She asked, "Will you still be my friend?"
• Do you agree with the saying, "All's fair in love and war"?
Here the question is outside the quote.
Edit Part I
1.) What is the correct way to write sentence 4?
(4) But the new band director was determined to
change things, his name was Mr. Parker.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A. But the new band director who was determined to
change things had a name of Mr. Parker.
Ralph, my best friend, attends Saturday lecture.
B. But the new band director, Mr. Parker, was
Butdetermined
the new band
director,
Mr. Parker, was
to change
things.
to change
C. determined
But the new band
directorthings.
was determined to
change things, named Mr. Parker.
D. The sentence is written correctly in the paper.
2. What change, if any, should be made in sentence 7?
(7) When he heard about the opening for a new band
director at our school he couldn’t help investigating.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A.
B.
C.
D.
Insert a comma after school
Change couldn’t to couldn’t hardly
Change investigating to investigatting
No change should be made in sentence 7.
After the child was seated, her mom pushed the swing.
The adult lions lead the way followed by the cubs.
3. What change needs to be made in sentence 11?
(11) But we weren’t laughing for long; Mr. Parker
hadn’t took the band director’s job to be funny.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A. Delete the semicolon
B. Change took to taken
C. Change director’s to directors’
(how many directors are
there?)
D. Nothing needs to be changed in sentence 11.
An independent clause is a complete sentence; it contains a noun and a verb
and can stand alone.
4. What change should be made in sentence 12?
(12) He was there to turn us into a respectable
band, and nothing—not even a bunch of lazy,
flippant teenagers—was going to stop them.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A. Change respectable to respectible
B. Delete the comma after band
C. Change was going to were going
D. Change them to him
5. What change needs to be made in sentence 18?
(18) At first there was a lot of grumbling, and a few
students were even tempted to quit, after a while,
though, we found ourselves somehow rising to Mr.
Parker’s expectations.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A. Change were even tempted to was even tempted
B. Change the comma after quit to a semicolon
C. Change ourselves to ourselfs
D. Change rising to risen (verb tenses)
6. What change needs to be made in sentence 19?
(19) As we marched onto the field at the first
football game, I could almost hear a collective
breathe of amazement from the crowd.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A.
B.
C.
D.
Change the comma to a semicolon
Change almost to allmost
Change breathe to breath
No change is needed.
7. What change, if any, should be made in sentence 23?
(23) He combined his thirst for excellence with
a compasionate, caring heart.
Consider EACH answer choice.
A.
B.
C.
D.
Change He combined to Combining
Change excellence to excellent
Change compasionate to compassionate
Make no change
Revise Section 2
1. How can Tasha revise sentence 7 to more
clearly establish the thesis of this paper?
A. How can a swimmer record such an amazing
video?
B. His video was so popular that people around
the world have now seen it.
C. Who do you suppose the photographer was?
D. The photographer who recorded the worldfamous footage was a sea turtle.
2. Sentences
1111
areare
choppy
andand
Sentences1010and
and
choppy
ineffective.
best
wayway
to revise
ineffective.What
Whatis isthe
the
best
to revise
these
thesesentences?
sentences?
(9)
The
camera’s
waterproof
case
was
A. Shultz charged the battery, while then
covered
with
debris,
butseveral
the photos.
discovering
thesea
video
along with
B.camera
After charging
battery,
Shultz discovered
insidethe
was
undamaged.
(10) the
video
along
with
several
photos.
Shultz charged the battery. (11) He
C. While charging the battery, Shultz then
then
discovered
the
video
along
with
discovered the video along with several photos.
photos.
Hebecause
decided
to
D.several
Shultz charged
the (12)
battery
he discovered
the video
along
several photos.
hunt
down
thewith
camera’s
owner.
3. Sentence 14 is unclear because it
contains an indefinite
indefinite reference.
reference. Tasha
Tasha can
can
clarify the meaning of this sentence by
changing itit to
to —
—
(13) One of the photos on the camera showed two men
preparing for a scuba dive. (14) Shultz posted it on an
Internet scuba site.
A. the dive
B. the camera
C. the photo
D. them
4. Tasha wants to improve
improve the
the transition
transitionbetween
betweenthe
thethird
third
paragraph (sentences
(sentences 13–17)
13–17) and the fourth
fourth paragraph
paragraph
(sentences 18–20). Which sentence could best follow
follow
sentence 17 and help improve
improve this
this transition?
transition?
A.
the on
woman
identified
themen
children’s
(13)As
Onesoon
of theas
photos
the camera
showed two
preparing for a
scuba
dive.the
(14)mystery
Shultz posted
it on
an Internet scuba site. (15)
family,
was
solved.
Visitors to the site determined that the photo had been taken in
B. Aruba,
She wasn’t
certain
butcoast
thought
she might
know
a Dutch island
off the
of Venezuela.
(16) Armed
with this
information,
then posted family photos from the camera on an
who theyShultz
were.
Aruban website. (17) Right away, an Aruban woman contacted him
C. and
Months
they had
been ininsome
the ofarea
with
said thatbefore,
she recognized
the children
the photos.
(18)the
The Royal
camera Dutch
belongedNavy.
to Dick de Bruin, a sergeant in the Royal
(19) of
De Bruin
lost the
while
was working
D. Dutch
As a Navy.
matter
fact,had
some
arecamera
calling
thishewoman
a
in the waters off the coast of Aruba. (20) When De Bruin and his
hero.partner had realized that the camera was gone, they had joked
diving
that it would probably be found somewhere in Costa Rica or Panama.
5. Tasha wants to add the following detail
detail to
to
the fifth paragraph
paragraph (sentences
(sentences 21–27).
21–27).
In fact, it is estimated to have traveled close to
1,100 miles in its six months afloat!
Where is the most logical place
place to
to insert
insert this
this sentence?
sentence?
(21) Of course, we now know that the buoyant camera floated much
farther than the two divers had predicted. (22) We also know that about
two months into the journey, a sea turtle swam near the camera,
inadvertently
a flipperof
onto
its carrying
strap, and somehow turned
A. At thehooked
beginning
the
paragraph
the device on. (23) The resulting 20-minute video shows the turtle bobbing
along
the ocean.
(24) Glimpses
B. inAfter
sentence
21 of a brightly shining sun are seen, and a
few fish occasionally come into view. (25) At some point the camera and
C.turtle
After
sentence
the
separate.
(26) For24
the remainder of the video, the camera is
pointed
up toof
thethe
sky with
the clear waters of the Caribbean Sea
D. Atstraight
the end
paragraph
washing over the lens. (27) Then the camera suddenly turns off.
6.
Tashawants
wantsto
toprovide
provideaabetter
betterclosing
closingfor
forher
herpaper.
paper.
6 Tasha
Which of the following could best be added after
after sentence
sentence
30 to support the previous
previous ideas
ideasand
andbring
bringaahumorous
humorous
conclusion to the paper?
(28) The story of the sea turtle’s video became big
news
onviewer
the small
island
of Aruba.
(29)
the
A.
As one
quipped,
“I didn’t
like some
of Once
the angles
chosen
andposted
probably
slightly
better
video,
video
was
oncould
the havemade
Internet, athe
story
quickly
but I recognize I would not be as good at laying eggs on a
spread
beach.”to the rest of the world. (30) While many
people
are the
impressed,
some
B.
Describing
video, Shultz
said,have
“The joked
cameraabout
startedthe
thrashing
around
and a fin came into the picture.”
skills
of the
photographer.
C. De Bruin added, “But we have the sea turtle on film proving
the camera floated from Aruba to the U.S. It’s unbelievable,
but it’s true.”
D. “I have a smile on my face. I can’t stop laughing about it,” De
Bruin said. “It’s really big news on the island.”
Edit Section 2
1. What change, if any, should be made in
sentence
3?
sentence 3?
(3) If you add the fries and the drink, you’ve probably exceeded
half of your suggested calorie allowence for the entire day!
A. Delete the comma
B. Change suggested to sugested
C. Change allowence to allowance
D. No change should be made in this sentence.
2. What change, if any, needs to be made
in
sentence
6?
in sentence 6?
(6) The researchers believe that more then 75 percent of adults
in the United States will be overweight or obese by 2015.
A. Change believe to beleive
B. Change then to than
C. Insert a comma after overweight
D. No change needs to be made in sentence 6.
3. What change, if any, should be made
in sentence 9?
(9) The first step fast-food companies must take
are to start providing more balanced options.
A. Change are to is
B. Change providing to provided
C. Change balanced to balansed
D. No change should be made in sentence 9.
4. What change, if any, should be
made in sentence 11?
(11) Even if restaurant chains offer fruit and low-fat
milk in their childrens’ meals, the most popular items
still contain 500 calories or more per serving.
A.
B.
C.
D.
Change offer to offering
Change their to there
Change childrens’ to children’s
No change should be made in this sentence.
5. What change, if any, needs to be
made in sentence 13?
(13) The fast-food industry should also post nutritional
information more clearer so that customers can make
informed choices.
A. Change post to have posted
B. Change clearer to clearly
C. Change so that to then
D. No change needs to be made in this sentence.
6. What is the correct way to rewrite
sentences 15 and 16?
(15) And while I believe that what someone eats is a matter of personal choice
and not something that society should control. (16) People need information if
they are going to make wise decisions.
A. And while I believe that what someone eats is a matter of
personal choice, it is not something that society should
control. Because people need information if they are going to
make wise decisions.
B. And I believe that what someone eats is a matter of personal
choice, it is not something that society should control, people
need information if they are going to make wise decisions.
C. And while I believe that what someone eats is a matter of
personal choice and not something that society should
control, people need information if they are going to make
wise decisions.
D. Sentences 15 and 16 are written correctly in the paper.
7. What is the correct way to write sentence 18?
(18) In fact, one New York City study found this, 27 percent of
fast-food customers used information about calorie counts to
make their choices.
A. In fact, one New York City study found that 27 percent of fastfood customers. They used information about calorie counts
to make their choices.
B. In fact, one New York City study found that 27 percent of fastfood customers using information about calorie counts to
make their choices.
C. In fact, one New York City study found something. That 27
percent of fast-food customers used information about
calorie counts to make their choices.
D. In fact, one New York City study found that 27 percent of fastfood customers used information about calorie counts to
make their choices.
8. What change is needed in sentence 23?
(23) Instead of pushing Americans up the obesity scale they
should use their position to promote healthful eating and
nutritional knowledge.
A.
B.
C.
D.
Insert a comma after scale
Change they to it
Insert a comma after eating
Change knowledge to knowlege
Finished!
Be sure your name is on your answer sheet.