Transcript Magical Moments - Ms. Kitchens` Corner

Magical Moments
Yes - you too, can create magic in
your essay with just a few simple
strategies!
1. Varied Sentence Structure
• Instead of sentences that always start with
the noun, and then the verb, flip-flop the
expected order:
Example: The Pope allowed Jay-Z and Lady
Gaga to perform, given that they raise money
for the Vatican.
Try this instead: Given that they raise
money for the Vatican, the Pope allowed
Jay-Z and Lady Gaga to perform.
How did I do this?
Another sentence…
• Change this sentence:
– Colleen loved giraffes because she was
rescued by a tribe of them at birth.
– Now you write your own sentence that
inverts or tampers with traditional word
order.
2. How to use the semi-colon
(But you know this, right??)
• The semi-colon is only used between
two _______________ clauses.
Ryan is not in 5th period; his face ends up on
popsicle sticks and his head bobbles
around.
Semi-colons
• You can also use a transitional
expression to connect the two.
Ryan is not in 5th period and so his face
ends up on popsicle sticks and his head
bobbles around.
Ryan is not in 5th period; therefore, his face
ends up on popsicle sticks and his head
bobbles around.
Transitional Expressions
• However, therefore, moreover, for
example, consequently, in addition,
accordingly, also, conversely,
furthermore, indeed, likewise,
meanwhile, nevertheless, similarly,
specifically, thus, at the same time, in
fact, on the contrary, on the other hand
…
Don’t use a semi-colon
with these words
and, but, or,
nor, for, so yet
These call for a comma only!
No Exceptions!!!
3. The DRAMATIC
Dash!
• This style of punctuation should only be used
for special occasions (No…Zach, not like
when you grace us with your presence).
• Use it when you want to insert a comment,
emphasize material, amplify an element
(especially at the end of a sentence), or mark
a sudden change in tone.
Some examples of my friend
“Dash”
• Consider the amount of sugar Ms. Kitchens
consumed on her binge—104 pounds in one
sitting!
• Julia found her spot, increased her horse’s
stride, put her eye at the top of the oxer and
balanced—her mighty steed stopped.
• Everything that went wrong—from my essay
being pooped on by a pigeon to Nathan
accidently cutting my hair and Greg eating
my cake—happened on my birthday.
4. How about those allusions?
• You may think all these timed writes are a
Sisyphean task, but another way to add
voice to your essays is through those pesky
allusions from our tea party. Don’t get a chip
on your shoulder or cry crocodile tears,
it’s not a Promethean task. I don’t want to
throw down the gauntlet or ask for a
pound of flesh, so just try using the
allusions. I bet if you do you’ll find once in a
blue moon, all that glitters IS gold!
Let’s see what you
remember
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Methuselah
White Elephant
Narcissus
Sirens
Achilles Heel
Tantalus
Allusions
• Allusions are ANY references to history,
politics, pop culture, art, music…etc.
• For instance, if you are re-writing “Birds” you
could allude to Thoreau, or another
Transcendentalist when discussing Dillard.
• What allusions might you use if you rewrote
“Magnasoles”?
5. Figurative Language
• If the piece is metaphoric, toss in a
metaphor of your own.
• Figurative language includes - similes,
metaphor, and personification.
• Remember to use imagery and detail
as well (all those voice tools you are
familiar with).
• How about an extended metaphor?
6. Powerful and unique verbs
• Don’t say “says”
• Say argues, concedes, laments,
discusses, digresses, ponders,
explains, demands, creates, etc….
• Use your yellow “says” paper for help
• Your vocabulary and word choice show
that you are an “academic writer.”
Always remember your audience!
Examine these sentences chock
full of strong verbs:
• “…overall enticing
the reader further
and braiding the
stories together…”
• “Every step toward
happiness these
immigrants take is a
Sisyphean task, for the
strict laws bind them
from advancing…The
reader is thrust into
two different situations,
one, an upper-middleclass American couple
that wrestle…”
REMEMBER:
– You must show that not only can you
analyze rhetorical strategies, you can USE
them too!
– This is a RHETORIC course. We are
learning about writing while becoming
better writers ourselves.
Your Job:
• Reread your timed writing from last
week.
• Attempt to increase your voice by
employing two additional strategies.
– If you already drop the dash on a regular
basis, attempt something else. If many of
your sentences employ semicolons, move
on to another strategy. This is your chance
to take a risk, with time on your side!