Transcript Understanding Students Disorienting Feelings In the Classroom

LESSON 11
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
UNDERSTANDING AND DEALING WITH
STUDENTS’ DISORIENTED FEELINGS
IN THE CLASSROOM
Presented by
THE NATURAL SYSTEMS INSTITUTE
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DEALING WITH
INTOLERABLE OR DISORIENTING FEELINGS
A NATURAL SYSTEMS
VERSUS
A MEDICAL MODEL APPROACH
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The Disorganization of Thought Processes Under the Influence of Intense Emotion
3. .Escalating
-Out of
control
4..Escalating
-Eruption
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3
2
As emotions, such as
anger, passion, fear,
increase in intensity,
temporal and social
perspectives
diminish and
thinking becomes
more irrational and
less grounded in
reality.
4. Bizarre, Chaotic - Illusions
and Delusions. Thought totally
under the control of emotion.
3. Escalating - Irrational
2..Escalating
-Intense
1. Thinking:
Cool, Rational
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2..Intense -Biased
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The Right-Now-Relief-Medicine
Versus Enduring Suffering and Learning to Grow
I’m
anxious!
I’m
angry!
I’m
depressed!
I’m keyed I have painful
longing!
up!
I’m
confused!
I need relief from this intolerable psychological
discomfort right away. I’ll ask my doctor for a pill.
Ahhh! Relief at last. Now we don’t have to cope with those awful feelings anymore. We don’t have to try to make our
egos grow and understand the situation causing the discomfort, what it is about us that makes us react that way, get a
perspective on experiencing feelings like that, or learn, practice, and master strategies for handling the situation and our
feelings. All that takes so much work and takes so long. We’d rather take the pill the rest of our lives than to have to go
through all that growth stuff before we gain mastery and then get relief.
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TAKING A LOOK AT THE MICROSCOPIC PROCESSES INSIDE THE
MIND
Observing a person from the
outside and at a distance, we do
not see or understand the processes
that are going on inside their head
or mind. We never can under any
circumstances.
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CHOOSING OUR LEVEL OF PERSPECTIVE FOR UNDERSTANDING OTHERS
Perceptions, feelings, reactions,
thoughts, projections and
strategizing, intentions,
feedback and evaluating, self
correcting, and storing in
memory all occur together,
usually in sequence, and flow
in patterns. These patterns are
written large and written small.
Larger patterns are replicated
but with respect to finer detail
within smaller patterns. We
choose the level of perspective
from which we try to
understand the other person.
At whatever level of perspective we take, we can check
repeatedly with the person to see if our guess as to what
is going on is correct in order to try to understand the
other person more deeply and correctly.
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What Happens When We Do Get Inside the Head of Another?
Thoughts keep cycling in
patterns. Sometimes, under
painful or terrifying emotions,
thoughts wildly whirl and one’s
mind seems out of control. This
magnifies the terror. Thoughts
are no longer capable of being
rational or in one’s best interest.
Behavior becomes impelled by
the painful emotions.
This
is
what
we
see!
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Getting Inside the Mind of Another Is Somewhat Like Seeing a
Galaxy Through a Hubbell Telescope. Sometimes You See a
Whirling Mass of Chaos and Sometimes You See a Black Hole.
Sometimes thoughts plummet
down in despair, becomes
ponderous, then sink into a black
hole of nothingness. This also
magnifies the terror. Yet, now, the
painful, numbing emotions
immobilize as though one were
dead.
Fueled by Emotion
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RESORTING TO A NON PERSONAL SOLUTION OR TREATMENT
The Sense of Powerlessness Over the Dysfunctional Patterns of Thinking and Emotion Makes One
Feel As Though Something Outside Oneself Must Stop the Madness. That Something Outside Must
Not Be Anyone Who Is a Part of the Problem, Like Family Members. In This State, the Person
Wants No Intruders That Might Judge or Advise. This Is Highly Frustrating to Close Family and
Friends Who, Then, Turn to Mechanical or Chemical Antidotes.
Please, if
you
won’t
listen to
us, go to
a doctor
and take
a pill so
we can
relax!!
Thank goodness that
now I don’t have to
worry about how to
cope and grow. I can
just take something
quick and no one will
be bent out of shape
over the way I’m
feeling, thinking, or
acting!!!
Ego getting weaker and
weaker and more and
more fragile. Dependency
and withdrawal pain
increase, confirming the
need for the medicine.
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Relating to the Intolerable Emotion
Thoughts
into extreme
or blanking
completely
intensity of
emotion.
whirling
confusion
out
from the
the
Emotions
becoming
intolerable.
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Learning to Gradually Simmer Down.
I’m going to stop
and focus on the
emotion. Really
sense what it is like.
Really think about
what it is like, why
I am having it, what
it is doing to me.
And now I’m going to
stop and realize this
emotion is not going to
kill me and is not going
to last forever. The
causal situation is not
going to last forever, or I
will eventually be able to
cope with it, or to live
with it, but I can survive
it! Life will go on.
I’m starting to calm down a
little. I bet if I keep this up
and then start focusing on
something non threatening
outside of myself, I will
really calm down. Then I can
start over and try to think the
situation through rationally.
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Escalating Emotions and Irrationality Vs. Deescalating and Rationality
Two scenarios for dealing with anger. The first case focuses outside of the self on the source of the anger. The
second case focuses on one’s own feelings and trying to communicate clearly about the issue to the other person.
In the first case, anger (and other extreme emotions) escalates and nothing is communicated or solved. Hard
feelings will be lurking in wait for the next encounter. In the second case, anger is understood and communicated,
deescalates, and the problem is resolved.
F
i
r
s
t
Stop it! You’re
making me angry.
..
*#@~`>+=%*”&! I’m
really getting mad.
I hate you! Get out.
*#@~`>+=%*”&! I’m
breaking everything.
..
..
Learning to cope and develop a stronger ego.
Listen, please. I want you to
S I’m getting angry.
hear what I am going to say and
e
How can I
to understand what I feel. I’ll
c communicate what say it as calmly and clearly as I
I feel?
o
can.
n
d
..
..
OK. Now that you understand
what I am getting angry about,
can we try to work something
out, negotiate a compromise? I
feel better about this already.
..
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ALTERNATIVE WAYS OF DEALING WITH
INTOLERABLE OR DISORIENTING FEELINGS
•Temporarily Increase Psychotherapy Visits.
•Stay In Close Contact With A Friend Or Relative, Who Is Not A Part Of The Problem, As
A Supporter, Especially Evenings And Nights.
•Work Out A Regimen To Help In Getting Through The Tough Time.
•Make As Few Additional Major Changes As Possible.
•Temporarily Avoid Being Around Disturbing Family, Friends, Or Associates.
•Keep Up A Healthy Diet.
•Take Mega Vitamins, Minerals, And Amino Acids Daily.
•Take Time, Several Times A Day, For 15 To 20 Minutes Each Time, To Engage In Relaxation.
•Do Light Exercise Before Going To Bed, Followed By A Warm Shower Ending With Luke Warm.
•Regularly Write About Feelings And Situations In A Journal, Especially Before Going To Bed.
•Use Relaxation Techniques And Tapes In Bed At Night To Relax, Do Not Try To Sleep, Do Not Try To
Control Thoughts. Briefly Write Disturbing Thoughts In Journal And Then Lie Back Down To Relax.
•Accept The Fact That You Will Have To Expend Great Energy And Time On Your
Therapy At This Time And Will Have To Endure The Discomfort Until You Grow, Gain
Mastery, And Develop Ego Strength. Life Will Become Bearable Again.
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A Sense of Mastery Comes From Realizing
You Made It Through the Emotional Storm,
on Your Own, With Minimal Medication.
You Feel So Much Stronger.
I did it!
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