Transcript Thesis Statements - Red Creek High School

Body Paragraphs
Topic Sentences, Supporting Evidence,
Clincher/Transition Sentences
Topic Sentences
Topic Sentences Should:
1.
2.
3.
State specific point directly supporting the
thesis;
Be worded directly and clearly;
Be placed at the start of the body paragraph;
Topic Sentences Should Not:
1.
2.
3.
Simply be informational;
Contain vague language—state a specific
point;
Be grammatically incorrect.
Topic Sentences
Which are good and which are not?
1. 17,000 Americans died from illicit drug use in
2000.
2. Illegal drugs cause a lot of problems.
3. Drugs is used by people who choosed bad.
4. The current system of dealing with drug users
must be changed because we are losing the
“war on drugs.”
5. It is a serious problem that must be addressed.
Supporting Details
Supporting Details Should:
1.
2.
3.
Provide direct supporting evidence for the
topic sentence;
Give sources of outside information;
Be relevant to the topic.
Supporting Details Should Not:
1.
2.
Be based on emotional language or bad
sources of evidence;
Be merely theoretical in most cases.
Supporting Details
Topic Sentence: The current system of dealing
with drug users must be changed because we
are losing the “war on drugs.”



17,000 Americans died in from illicit drug use
(Mokdad et al. “Actual Causes of Death in the
United States 2000.” CSDP)
1,583,813 were arrested for drug violations in
2002 (“Total Estimated Arrests, 2002.” World
Almanac)
Over 46% of Americans have used illegal drugs
at least once (“Drug Use in the General U.S.
Population, 2003.” World Almanac)
Clincher/Transition Sentence
Clincher/Transition Sentences Should:
1.
2.
3.
Drive the point of the paragraph home;
Provide connections to surrounding
paragraphs;
Provide connection to the thesis.
Clincher/Transition Sentences Should Not:
1.
2.
3.
Peter out;
Bring up new evidence;
Be ungrammatical.
Clincher/Transition Sentence
Besides being ineffectual, imprisoning drug
abusers is also costly.
Next topic sentence: Sending drug abusers to
treatment programs rather than prison would
both save taxpayer money and alleviate the
chronic overcrowding of our prisons.
Completed Paragraph
The current system of jailing many drug users must be
changed because we are losing the “war on drugs.”
Casualties in this war include around 17,000 deaths
a year (Mokdad et al. “Actual Causes of Death in
the United States 2000.” CSDP) and over a million
and a half arrests (“Total Estimated Arrests, 2002.”
World Almanac). The fact that nearly 46% of
Americans have tried illegal drugs at least once
(“Drug Use in the General U.S. Population, 2003.”
World Almanac) is an indication that the threat of
prison is not working at all. Besides being
ineffectual, imprisoning drug abusers is also costly.