Transcript What is Communication?

WHAT IS
COMMUNICATION?
DEFINITION
• Communication is a two way
exchange of information.
• There are three types of
communication:
VERBAL
• communication through language
using words
having a spoken conversation
VERBAL
NONVERBAL
• communication
other than
through spoken
language
• 70 to 90%
of our
communication is
non verbal
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• body language
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• eye contact
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• muscle tension
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• posture
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• mannerisms
NONVERBAL ~ EXAMPLES
• proxemics
(How close we stand
when talking to
someone.)
ROLE PLAY #1 ~ NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION
DONNA: Hi, Isabel. Look, do you have a few minutes? There’s something I really want to talk to
you about.
ISABEL: Oh sure, Donna. Of course I have time for you! What is it you wanted to talk to me
about?
DONNA: Well, I’m having a problem with this guy Charles at work. He’s sending me a lot of
mixed signals. Sometimes we get along great during our shifts, but other times, he gets
really angry at me, and will yell at me for the tiniest mistake. It’s really embarrassing, and
makes me anxious about going into work. I’m thinking about telling my boss, but I don’t
want Charles to get mad at me.
ISABEL: (Acts distracted and annoyed that Donna is taking up her time. She taps her foot, looks at her
watch, twirls her hair, looks away, picks her nails, etc.) Oh really? Well, I just want you to
know that I’m here for you, Donna.
What message is Isabel communicating to Donna through her nonverbal actions?
PARAVERBAL
• communicating not by what you say, but how you say it
 voice qualities/voice tone (Is your voice flat or monotone?)
rate of speech (how fast or slow you talk)
volume (how loud or quiet you talk)
inflection (which words you emphasize; how you say certain
words)
ROLE PLAY #2 ~ PARAVERBAL COMMUNICATION
MOM: Good morning, honey! Just so you know, I put your signed permission
form on the kitchen table so you wouldn’t forget it.
KID: (in a loud voice, dripping with sarcasm) Oh thanks, Mom – I really appreciate
that.
VS
MOM: Good morning, honey! Just so you know, I put your signed permission
form on the kitchen table so you wouldn’t forget it.
KID: (in a sincere tone of voice) Oh thanks, Mom – I really appreciate that.
What is the difference between these two scenarios?
WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO HAVE GOOD
COMMUNICATION SKILLS?
•
•
•
•
•
•
for your message to be heard
to get your point across
to get the job done
to make sure that instructions are followed properly
to avoid mistakes or problems
for people to get along (ie., to avoid conflict; misinterpretation;
etc.)
GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS
VS
BAD COMMUNICATION SKILLS
• making good eye contact
• sitting or standing attentively
• nodding as the other person
talks
• smiling and responding to the
other person
• speaking clearly
• waiting your turn to speak
• looking away, or rolling your eyes
• slouching
• tapping your fingers, or looking
away
• crossing your arms and sighing
• mumbling
• interrupting
ACTIVITY
• Think of a time when you had a conversation that ended in a negative
way (eg., you got in a fight; you got in trouble; etc.)
• Describe the situation.
– Who were you talking to?
– Why were you having the conversation?
– How did the conversation end?
• Describe the reasons why the
conversation went poorly.
• Come up with at least three ways that
the communication could have been improved.
ACTIVE LISTENING
• Active Listening is the
key to good
communication.
• Active Listening focuses
entirely on what the
other person is saying.
• Active Listening takes
the time to make sure
that what the speaker is
trying to say is heard.
WHAT DOES ACTIVE LISTENING LOOK LIKE?
• Focus on the other person.
• Use attentive body language – sit slightly forward with a relaxed, easy
posture.
• Use verbal cues such as “um-hmmm,” “sure,” “ah,” and “yes.”
• Ask open-ended questions where the person has to say more than
“yes” or “no”.
• Ask clarifying questions to make sure that you understand what the
person said (eg., “Can you tell me more about why you don’t like
dogs?”).
• Paraphrase what the person said.
(eg., “When you said that you
were nervous in front of large
crowds, did you mean that public
speaking is a challenge for you?”).
WHAT ACTIVE LISTENING DOES NOT LOOK LIKE:
• Quickly agreeing with the person before they
finish speaking.
• Passing judgment.
(eg., “Well, I would never have done that.”)
• Asking follow-up questions that are for your
own information.
• Reassuring the person
that the situation is
“not that bad”.
ROLE PLAY!
• Working in small groups, you will be assigned a communications
scenario.
• First, two members of your group will act out the initial scenario.
(Follow the guidelines of the scenario, but be creative when you’re bringing
the situation to life!)
• Next, one to two members of your group will explain
a) what went wrong
b) what could be improved
• Finally, two members of your
group will act out a revised
scenario that illustrates
a) good communication skills
b) good active listening skills
Make sure all members of your group are involved!
SCENARIO ONE
• You ask your mom to borrow the car for the weekend.
• She rolls her eyes and says that the last time you borrowed
the car, you didn’t refill the gas tank.
• You yell at her and tell her that she never lets you do
anything.
• She yells at you and tells you to go to your room. Needless
to say, you don’t get the car for the weekend.
• What went wrong?
• How could the communication in this situation be improved?
SCENARIO TWO
Your teacher asks you to hand in your homework.
You ignore the teacher and keep talking to your friend.
Your teacher demands that you go in the hall immediately.
You tell the teacher to “&*%$! off, and storm out of the
classroom.
• The next day, you get a detention for swearing and skipping
class.
• What went wrong?
• How could the communication in this situation be improved?
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SCENARIO THREE
• You get your work schedule for the week, and you’re scheduled to work on
Friday, even though you asked for the night off a month in advance.
• You ask your boss why you were scheduled to work that night.
• Your boss tells you tough luck – not everyone gets what they want.
• You tell your boss that you think it’s unfair that you can’t have one night off,
especially when you requested it a month in advance.
• Your boss tells you that you have an attitude problem, and fires you on the spot.
• What went wrong?
• How could the communication in this situation be improved?
SCENARIO FOUR
• You and your partner have been dating for three months.
• When you arrive at school, you surprise him/her with flowers to commemorate the
occasion.
• Your partner vaguely says “thanks”, and quickly stuffs the flowers into his/her locker.
• The bell rings, and your partner moves to take your hand so you can walk to class
together.
• Hurt by his/her reaction to your surprise, you cross your arms, and briskly walk to
class alone.
• Your partner calls out after you, “What did I do this time?!”
• What went wrong?
• How could the communication in this situation be improved?