Transcript Slideshow

Eliminating Wordiness
www.chaffey.edu/writingctr/WordinessPower
point(Rev).ppt, modified by Rebecca Oberg
Avoid “Be” Verbs
•am
•are
•is
•was
•were
•being
•been
“Be” verbs are considered actionless verbs and should be
changed to active verbs when appropriate.
Avoid “Be” Verbs
The boring textbook was being read by the
students.
change to
The students read the boring textbook .
Avoid “Be” Verbs
It is better to become a nurse instead of a
teacher.
change to
Nursing pays better than teaching does.
WARNING!!!
Sometimes you should use “be” verbs.
•I am 21 years old.
Or if the agent—the one performing the action—is
unknown, you may use the passive voice.
•The walls had been defaced by graffiti.
Active vs. Passive Verbs
In academic writing (with the exception of
scientific writing) active sentences are
preferred over passive ones.
Active vs. Passive Verbs
In sentences written in the active voice, the
subject performs the action expressed by
the verb.
•Roseanne wrote the paper.
Active vs. Passive Verbs
In sentences written in the passive voice,
the subject receives the action expressed by
the verb.
•The paper was written by Roseanne.
Active vs. Passive
Passive: The Old Man and the Sea was
written by Hemingway.
change to
Active: Hemingway wrote The Old Man and
the Sea.
Active vs. Passive
Passive: It is believed by some critics that
Psycho is Hitchcock’s greatest film.
change to
Active: Some critics believe that Psycho is
Hitchcock’s greatest film.
WARNING!
At times, it may be appropriate to write in the passive
voice. The passive voice is preferred in scientific
papers.
•Experiments have been conducted to test the safety
of generic pharmaceuticals.
English and Humanities papers, however, are written
in the active voice.
•Dr. Harker conducted experiments to test the safety
of generic pharmaceuticals.
Condense Phrases into Single
Words
The employee with ambition got the
promotion.
change to
The ambitious employee got the promotion.
Condense Phrases into Single
Words
Rob decided to retake the class at a later
date in time.
change to
Rob decided to retake the class later.
All these phrases can be
condensed into one word.
•
•
•
•
•
the reason for
for the reason that
due to the fact that
in light of the fact that
considering the fact
that
• this is why
= because, since, why
All these phrases can be
condensed into one word.
• on the occasion of
• in a situation in which
• under circumstances
in which
= when
All these phrases can be
condensed into one word.
•
•
•
•
•
it is crucial that
it is necessary that
there is a need for
it is important that
cannot be avoided
= must, should
All these phrases can be
condensed into one word.
•
•
•
•
it is possible that
there is a chance that
it could happen that
the possibility exists
for
= may, might, could
Avoid Repetitive Wording
end result = end
past experience = past
share in common = share
small in size = small
Avoid Repetitive Wording
made a discovery = discovered
made an attempt = attempted
made an accusation = accused
made an appearance = appeared
made a decision = decided
Avoid Repetitive Wording
I thought in my head
I thought to myself
In my mind, I think
In my opinion, I think
= I thought
= I think
Review
• Avoid “be” verbs:
am, are, is, was, were, being, been.
• Use active rather than passive verbs.
• Condense phrases into single words.
• Omit repetitive wording.
Eliminating Wordiness
• Eliminate wordiness in the editing stage of
the writing process.
• With practice you will automatically
eliminate wordiness as you draft your
papers.