Transcript Exploding a Moment

E. X. A. M.
Writing Technique
Explode
A
Moment
Professional Examples
Among the Hidden pg 1
The author could have written:
He heard his mother call and, though he didn’t
want to, he went inside.
But instead….she wrote this….
Because of Winn-Dixie ch 1
The author could have written:
I walked into the grocery story one day and
ended up coming home with a dog.
But instead….she wrote this….
Writing in Slow Motion
Slow motion writing lets the reader know that this
moment is important. It also gives the reader time to
really experience and visualize the event.
If there is a part in the narrative that gives important
background information but is not a truly significant
moment, the writing should be sped up there. Good
writers touch on that information briefly, but then get the
reader back to the heart of
the narrative.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71nURVXXeaM
Event
“I was playing hide and seek, and I thought I
would hide in the trunk of a white car.”
How many parts really make up the
whole event?
•
•
•
•
One, she climbed into the trunk;
Two she pulled the trunk almost closed
Three, her brother pushed the trunk closed;
Four, Felicia kicked and screamed to be let
out.
When you explode a moment each
smaller event can be its own
paragraph.
Entry into the trunk:
I crawled into the trunk, onto the hard
but padded floor. I looked to see if he was
there. I glanced back at the door. As soon
as I saw him coming, my face pinched into
a worried frown. I slowly lay down. I
grabbed the steel white rim of the trunk
and pulled on it until it reached the tip top
of the lock. I could see a little, just enough
to peak. It looked like a line of light
between the trunk door and the car.
2 & 3 Inside the trunk
“Where is he?” I asked myself. I could no longer see
through the small opening of light that had come into
the trunk. It was completely silent. No one was to be
seen. I looked out, raising the trunk lid a little. He
sneaked around, looked right at me, eyeball to eyeball,
and slammed the door shut. I pushed. I kept on pushing.
It was locked!
4 Kicking and Screaming to Get Out
I panicked. “Open this trunk right now!” I said. I kicked
at the door. How could he open it, though? I asked myself.
He didn’t have the keys. I started to feel sweat roll
down my body. I kicked and kicked and kicked. What
could I do? All I could do was wait. I felt bruises forming,
and my legs started to sting. It was dark, and I just
lay there. I was burned out with no energy left. It was
all silent.
Let’s see another one…
“He walked through the
doorway.”
Revised
He grasped the cold doorknob and turned it
slowly to the right. He pushed the door
inward. The hinges squeaked and cold air
rushed past the opening door. The room was
dark. He darted his eyes to the
right. Nothing. He pushed the door open a
little farther, and slowly moved his right foot
into the room. His shoe creaked a bit as it hit
the polished hardwood floor.
Exploding the Moment
1. I woke up late this morning--as usual.
2. I had no clean clothes and the fridge was next to bare.
3. Traffic was heavy as I sped to work. Some jerk cut me off
and I almost had a wreck.
4. At work I went to my desk and there was a note to go and
see the boss.
5. I waited outside her office for a while before she called
me in. I couldn’t figure out why she wanted to see me.
6. I went inside and sat down. My boss handed me an
envelope. She told me that my services were no longer
needed and that I was free to go.
7. I got my belongings from my desk and left. The drive
home was quick. I am now unemployed.
What moment can you explode?
Wednesday, October 15th
Goals:
1. Create sentences using verbs in the envelopes, correctly identifying
the type of verb(s) used
2. Use the Explode a Moment writing technique to give my reader a
frame-by-frame picture of the action as well as insight into my
character’s thoughts during a moment in my story– slowing down
and using sensory detail to snap the writing into focus
3. Use the feedback from my oral telling, along with my pre-writing, to
draft rising action that includes the following:
Actions
And
Dialogue
conference
Sensory Details
with my
Thoughts and Feelings
teacher!
Suspense (Remember to build to a climax.)
I <3
verbs
4-
What moment can
you explode?
Exploding a Moment . . .(allows)
Writers to stretch the
exciting seconds of their
stories into what seems like
hours, creating
suspense for the reader to
savor.
Create a Sentence
Action, Linking, and Helping Verbs Review
• DIRECTIONS
Each envelope contains 6 verbs. The verbs are action, linking, and helping.
Your task is to craft 4 sentences using the words provided as verbs.
Here are the rules:
• You may not reuse verbs.
• You may change the tense of verbs (for example ‘watch’ can become
‘watches’ or ‘watched).
• One sentence the verb must function as an Action Verb.
Where do
• Once sentence the verb must function as a Linking Verb.
I write the
sentences
• Once sentence must have an Action Verb Phrase.
?
• Once sentence must have a Linking Verb Phrase
After you write your sentences in your Writer’s Notebook, please
underline your verb or verb phrase 
Exploding the Moment
• Select a sentence
• Explode that sentence
• Provide your reader with a frame-by-frame
picture of the action (details)
• Provide your reader with insights into the
character’s thoughts
• Consider tools from the Writer’s Toolbox
Teacher Example- Pd. 4
I turned the corner and could see the Russians coming
down the ally. I hid behind a dumpster and then
ambushed them.
I could feel my heart pounding through my chest and I feared that the loud thumping
would give away my position to the Russians. I crept around the corner, keeping my knees
bent to prevent exposing my ponytail. I spotted the dumpster across the ally; a homeless
man was causually rummaging through the black plastic bag strewn open on the group
adjascent to the dumpster, looking for a meager scrap to call a meal. I couldn’t let him see
me, but I needed to get behind that dumpster…
Teacher Example- Pd. 2
I saw Niles Kane standing over Peanuts nearly lifeless
body. He gave a swift kick to his midsection and Peanuts
heaved as if the last breath was exiting his body.
I creeped through the back hallway of the lion exhibit. I florescent bulb shuddered in
the distance. The exhibit was desolate, cold, and quiet. I heard a muffled whine
coming from where Peanut is kept after hours. I inched down the hallway, wanting to
see but not wanting to see…
Beginning
• In the beginning of your story, you should
introduce your characters.
• The reader should also know about the world
your characters live in (the setting) and
something about each of the characters in
your story.
• The beginning of your story is also the place
where your plot (the problem) is first
introduced.
Middle
Your story needs to build to something exciting,
the climax. Write about a simple conflict, a
task that must be completed, a question that
must be answered, or a barrier that must be
overcome.
Climax
Rising Action
Resolution
Beginning
Middle
• Include
– Actions
– Dialogue
– Sensory Details
– Thoughts and Feelings
– Suspense (Remember to build to a climax.)
The End
This is the big finish. The end should reveal how
you overcame your problem. conflicts are
resolved in some way.