Transcript highimpact - PCC - Portland Community College

TriMet
High Impact Business Writing
CLIMB Center for Advancement
Portland Community College
Facilitated by George Knox
Overview of Workshop Modules
Pre-Writing Analysis
 Organization & Formatting
 Strategies for Specific Documents
 Style & Diction
 Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling
 Proofreading, Revising & Editing

Perception

Studies show that
we all have
preferred
“perceptual styles”
 Presenter’s
preferences may be
different than
audience’s
 Effective perception
combines styles
Perceptual Styles
(Adapted from Dunn and Dunn Learning Styles Model)
Auditory
Focuses on what is
heard
Remembers 75% heard
Distracted by notetaking
Tactile
Focuses on what is
touched and
manipulated
Remembers by touching
Takes both traditional
and visual notes
Visual
Focuses on what is
seen
Remembers 75% seen
Summarizes with notes
Kinesthetic
Focuses on moving
within contextual
environment
Remembers by doing
Distracted by notetaking
Perceptual Styles (Cont.)



Perceptual styles are only preferences
Most people utilize more than one style
Most people can learn to use different styles
SO

Recognize your preference, but learn to use
the style(s) that work best for each situation
 Prepare your documents with audience’s
perceptual styles (multiple) in mind
Document Development

P.A.T.
– Purpose
– Audience
– Technique

Purpose and Audience Determine Technique!
P. A. T.

Purpose
– Topic
– Goals (Inform, persuade, entertain, record, cite,
respond, etc.)
– Requirements (Schedule, materials, budget, tools,
delivery, etc.)

Audience
– Who? Multiple audiences?
– Expectations (Content, style, delivery, etc.)
– Requirements

Technique
Pre-Writing Techniques

Brainstorming
• Write down any ideas that come
to you
• Write fast
• Write until you have nothing else
to write
Pre-Writing Techniques

Freewriting
• Time yourself
• Start writing on the topic and don’t stop
until the time is up
• Don’t worry about sentence structure,
spelling, grammar
Pre-Writing Techniques

Cluster Map
• Brainstorm based on cluster structure
• Clump key ideas around who, what, when,
where, why and how bubbles
• Write until you have nothing else to write
Overcoming Writer’s Block
P.A.T.
 Write out main message/point
 Sentence Outline
 Diagram/Flow Chart
 Don’t write sequentially
 “Talk it out”
 Take a break and come back later

Document Design: Focus
“The Rule of Ones”
– One idea per sentence
– One topic sentence per paragraph
– One thesis/main point per document
Document Design: Format
Informative
 Intro of
problem
 Main point
 Details
 Summary
(restating
main point)
Persuasive
 Intro of
problem
 Main point
 Supports
 Summary
 Request for
action
Instructional
 Intro of
problem
 Steps in
sequential
order
 Sources of
further help
Document Design: Flow

Front load vs. back load
 Roadmap
– Statement of purpose
– Overview of content

Signposts (Text)
– Transitional phrases and words

Cues (Visual)
– Visual elements guiding reader
– Headings, highlighted text, dividers, white space

Chunking (Grouping related elements)
 Parallel form
Document Design: Graphics

Integrate graphics into text
– See Tips for Using Visuals
Maintain a graphic theme
 Generally do not use clip art or
extraneous graphics for formal
documents
 Follow corporate/publication guidelines
 Adhere to copyright law

Document Design: Other Issues
Headings, spacing, pagination, type
 Titles, length, submission
 Documentation of sources

All of these are dependent upon the
publisher and style guide
Formatting Text








10-12 point type (body text)
Serif vs. San Serif
Consistent type styles (“Magic 3”)
Bold/italics to emphasize
Avoid all capitals
Ragged right – justified left margins
Text boxes, large size, color for emphasis
Formatting Your Document (TriNET)
http://trinet/mktg-custsvc/mktg/creative_services/formatting.htm
Memo and E-mail

Purpose
– Written record (paper or electronic)
– Information re: policies and procedures
– Request for internal action
– Documentation of decisions or actions
– “Paper trail”
Memo and E-mail

Audience
– Internal (usually)
– Individual, departmental or company-wide
– Knowledge of company organization, values,
policies, procedures, etc.
– Familiar with jargon and acronyms
– Attention to internal communications?
Note: E-mail is becoming more common for external
communications
Technique: Memos & E-mail

Procedure and Information Messages

Request and Reply Messages

Confirmation (or Denial) Messages

Other?
Procedure/Information Message

Routine messages

“Downward” flow

Informational in nature

Goal of employee participation and
cooperation
 Direct or indirect depending on nature of
message (good news, bad news, etc.)
Tip: Tone is important for success.
Request and Reply Messages

Request for information and action
– Persuasive in nature
– Direct or indirect depending on nature of
request and source of request

Reply to previous communication
– Direct response to initiator
– Indirect response to wider audience
Confirmation Messages

“Incident” or “To File” reports

Documentation of decisions, directives, and
discussions

Names and titles of people involved

Major issues described

Request for confirmation of receipt

Direct message
Technique: Strategies

Headings: Date, To, From, Subject

Single topic

Conciseness

Conversational tone

“Cues” and “Signposts”
Technique: Strategies

Direct vs. Indirect message
– Direct (“Front loaded”) message places
main point early in the document
– Indirect (“Back loaded”) message places
main point late in the document
– Use direct approach for “good” news or
when acceptance is assured
– Use indirect approach for “bad” news or
when persuasion is necessary
Techniques: Delivery
Memos – Use standard in-house
delivery unless otherwise requested
 E-mail

– Use in-house standards (company vs.
personal web-based e-mail, stationary,
HTML vs. text only, etc.) within company
– Contact outside audiences for restrictions

Avoid common e-mail mistakes
Common E-mail Mistakes






Address errors
Long messages or attachments
Misleading or vague subject lines
Inappropriate content
Lack of discretion in responses
Inappropriate copying and forwarding
Source: John Edwards, “The Six Most Common Mistakes in
Sending E-mail”, Bottom Line Business, October 1997.
Letters

Purpose
– Written record (Paper)
– Formal information, persuasive or
responsive communication
– Documentation with “wet” signature
– “Official” communication with letterhead
– Contractual agreement
– “Paper trail”
Letters

Audience
– External (usually)
– May be unfamiliar with internal
organization, values, procedures, etc.
– May be unfamiliar with jargon and
acronyms
– May be inattentive to communication
– Seeking formal or “official” message
Technique: Kinds of Letters




Routine Letters
– Request for information and action
– Direct reply
Good News
– Approved request
– Commendation/Recommendation
Bad News Letters
– Denied request
– Criticism/disciplinary action/termination
Persuasive Letters
– Sales -Proposals
Technique: Strategies

Single topic

Formal style and tone

“Official” letterhead and signature

“Cues” and “Signposts”

Request for action
Technique: Strategies

Direct vs. Indirect message
– “Front load” Routine and Good News
Letters
– “Back load” Bad News Letters
– For Persuasive Letters, use the message
that best fits the audience
Tip: If cost is involved, you probably should
“back load”.
Communicating Bad News

Goals
– Make the audience understand and accept
– Maintain positive image of organization
– Make message clear so additional
communication is unnecessary
– Avoid creating legal liability
Communicating Bad News

Strategies
– Indirect message
• Buffer with a neutral or positive opening
• Give reasons or causes for bad news
• Clearly state bad news, providing alternatives
or “next steps” if possible
• Close with a personal, future-looking statement
Tip: Use subordinating or passive language (“Although your claim
cannot be processed under current guidelines, we can provide a
list of alternative ….”)
Communicating Bad News

Strategies
– Avoiding Liability
• Do not use abusive language (defamation) or
careless language implying liability
• Do not state or imply views that run contrary to
your organization
• Do not admit or imply responsibility without
checking with legal counsel
• Do not use “official” documents or equipment to
communicate your personal views
Persuasive Writing
Strategies:


Gain attention
– Review problem and state action taken
– Stimulate a question and offer an answer
– State a benefit to the audience
Build interest
– Offer strong supports
– Suggest direct and indirect benefits
– Avoid emotionality
Persuasive Writing
Strategies:



Reduce resistance
– Counter possible arguments
– Demonstrate credibility
Motivate action
– Request specific action and repeat benefits
Reinforce business relationship
Technical Formats
Instructions
 Reports
 Executive Summaries

Instructions

Purpose
– Technical documentation of a specific task
– Directive with sequential steps
– “Used” during task

Audience
– Varying technical abilities
– “Users”, not readers
– May need hazard statements
Technique: Document Types

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User Manual (Step-by-step for novice)
Tutorial (Mini-lessons for novice)
Reference Manual (Indexed for expert)
Quick Reference Guide (Indexed for expert)
Procedural Guide (Step-by-step for novice &
expert, Primarily to document)
Policy Manual (Categorized for novice &
expert, Primarily to document)
On-Line Documentation (Tree
structures/topics for novice & expert)
Technique: Basic Format
Introduction
2. Required materials/tools
3. Sequential steps
4. Additional resources
1.
Technique: Strategies

Keep language simple and direct
– 2nd person imperative
– Appropriate technical language
– Active voice
– Avoid future tense
– Industry standards (e.g. ANSI)
Technique: Strategies

List steps sequentially
– Numbered lists for ordered tasks
– Bulleted lists for unordered tasks
– Vertical lists usually easier to read than
horizontal lists
– Introduce steps or groups of steps (e.g. “To
install the software, follow these steps:”)
Technique: Strategies
Emphasize tasks over results (user’s
actions before reactions)
 Describe any necessary parts, tools or
equipment BEFORE giving directions
 Include visuals when appropriate
(especially for “visual perceivers” and
international readers)

Technique: Hazard Statements
Place warnings before and near the
hazardous task listed
 Highlight warning w/ appropriate visual
techniques (symbols, colors, bold, etc.)
 Keep hazard statements direct, clear
and accurate
 Follow expected/required guidelines

Reports

Purpose
– Document primary or secondary research
– Aid decisions, qualify sources and record
work or activities

Audience
– Expects summaries, methods, findings
– May expect recommendations
– Data may be scrutinized
– Multiple audiences?
Technique: Basic Format
Front Matter

–
–
–
–
–
–
Cover
Title page
Abstract
Table of contents
List of figures and tables
Executive summary
Technique: Basic Format (cont.)

Introduction
– Definition & scope of problem
– Background
– Methodology
– Report organization
Technique: Basic Format (cont.)

Body
– Project details (Data, method review)
– Conclusion (Analysis of findings)
– Recommendations
– Notes
Technique: Basic Format (cont.)

Back Matter
– Appendices
– Glossary
– Bibliography/References/Works Cited
– Resume/Vitae
– Index
Technique: Strategies

Primary research
– Clear description of methodology
– Summary of data gathered (in body)
– Access to full data (usually Appended)
– Cross references to other research
– Secondary sources used in Background to
add credibility
Technique: Strategies

Secondary research
– Verify your sources with clear
documentation
– Explain/describe sources as necessary
– Use citation style as required or expected
Executive Summary

Purpose
– Introduce document
– Give synopsis of contents
– Persuade reader of validity and importance
of document

Audience
– Multiple audiences: technical and nontechnical
– Expect summary of major points and
findings
– May be read as “stand alone” document
Technique: Basic Format

Mini-document
– Organize around major sections of full
document
– Condense material into suitable length

“Brochure”
– Highlight major sections most relevant to
non-technical audience
– Categorize and order by importance to
audience
Technique: Strategies

Length: Usually 1 page, but could be longer
(1/16th rule?)
 Highlight major sections with headings,
bulleted lists, graphics, page design (e.g.
multi-column), etc.
 Language: Use key words and concepts,
Explain technical terms and acronyms
 Do NOT “cut and paste” or “summarize by
list”
Style: Business vs. Technical
Business Writing:
 Purposeful
 Persuasive
 Flexible
 Economical
 Reader-focused
Technical Writing:
 Purposeful
 Informative
 Structured
 Economical
 Product/processfocused
Style: Business Writing
Strategies:
 Gain attention early
 Clarify benefits to
readers
 Always include a
“request for action”
 Front load a positive
message
 Back load a negative
message

Use keywords
 Explain technical or
unfamiliar terms
 Prepare for multiple
audiences
 Avoid conversational
and narrative styles
 Consider multiple
modes of delivery
Style: Technical Writing
Strategies:
 Design document to be
“used” rather than
“read”
 Provide for document
navigation
 Front load most
technical documents
 Use appropriate
technical & industry
terms including
acronyms
 Use technical graphics
whenever possible




Create distinct
document sections
based on use
Provide necessary
caution and warning
messages
Prepare document for
use within technical
setting
Consider multiple
modes of delivery
Style: Proper Citation

Use the correct style
– (Academic/industry standard, in-house guide,
editor/reader preference)

Document your sources in progress
– Take notes with source info
– Place citations/short-cuts in drafts

Proofread for citations
– Citations matched with sources?
– Correct style and punctuation?
Diction (Word Choice and Order)
Diction affects:
 Meaning
 Tone
 Emphasis
Diction: Barriers to Meaning

Misused words
– See Commonly Confused Words

Nonspecific nouns
– Area, factor, issue, problem, thing

Slang, regional expressions, figures of
speech, inappropriate jargon
 Euphemisms, pretentious language
– Adult language, collateral damage, disadvantaged,
economic downturn, pre-owned, rightsizing

Sexist language
Diction: Barriers to Tone

Inappropriate level of formality
–
–
–
–

Contractions and acronyms
Slang, jargon, figures of speech
Proper or strict language
I’d like to get that info you’ve got posted on your web page. VS. I
would like a copy of the information posted on your web site.
Improper connotation
– Images and emotions associated with a word or phrase
– The details he gave were fictional. VS. The details he gave were
not factual. VS. The details he gave were incorrect.

Figures of speech, clichés
Diction: Barriers to Emphasis

Multiple terms for same subject
– First term has emphasis and sets tone
– My client is innocent. I am confident that the jury
will find him not guilty due to insufficient evidence.

Active vs. passive voice
– Focus on actor or result
– The company laid off 300 workers. VS. Three
hundred workers were laid off by the company.

Front load vs. back load
Diction: Editing and Revising
Consider PAT
 Proof for meaning, tone and emphasis
 Default to direct meaning and formal
tone (unless writing personal narratives
and correspondence)
 Generally avoid jargon and slang
 Check a dictionary and/or thesaurus

Diction: Editing and Revising
Consider the following statements:
 Your client is responsible for the accident.
 Your client caused the accident.
 Your client is liable for the accident.
What is the meaning of each sentence?
What is the connotation for each sentence?
Where is the emphasis in each sentence?
TriMet Style Guides

Cliff NotesTM to TriMet Style

TriMet Style Guide (TriNET)
– http://trinet/mktg-custsvc/mktg/creative_services/style_guide.htm

Simplifying Your Writing (TriNET)
– http://trinet/mktg-custsvc/mktg/creative_services/choosing_words.htm

Formatting Your Document (TriNET)
– http://trinet/mktg-custsvc/mktg/creative_services/formatting.htm

The “Voice” of TriMet
Liability Issues: Risks

“Technical” Liability
– Negligence
– Breach of Warranty
– “Strict Liability in Tort(e)”

Marketing Liability
– “Uniform Commercial Code”
– Expressed Warranty of Description

Other Areas of Liability
– Privacy
– Financial
– Employment
Liability Issues: Protections

Accuracy
– Check for clear interpretations and findings
– Do not suppress knowledge or data
– Do not exaggerate claims or data

Ownership
– Confirm copyright, trademarks, etc.

Public Domain
– Most documents by public officials are in
public domain (w/ legal/privacy exceptions)
– Consider documents as “published”
Liability Issues: Avoiding Problems


Be accurate (factual, precise)
Know your audience
– Needs and expectations
– Abilities (“reasonable person”)
– Risk

Document your work
–
–
–
–
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Sources/Citations
Paper trail
Data records
Copies of correspondence
Get approval of your work
– “Sign off”
– Feedback from peers
– Practical test with target audience

Use waivers/consent forms
Business Grammar
“I once shot an elephant in my pajamas.
How he got into my pajamas, I’ll never
know.”
- Groucho Marx
Why Is English Grammar So
Difficult?
We have a complex language
 We first learn the grammar informally
(as young children before schooling)
 We have “multiple grammars”

– Verbal (formal and informal)
– Written (formal and informal)

Our standards change
Why Is English Grammar Important?
 Meaning
 Clarity
 Credibility
For example:
“Despite the warnings given to
the worker by his manager, his
actions resulted in liability for the
company and for employee.”
Whose actions? Which
employee? Who is responsible?
The Parts of Speech
Noun – Names a person, place, thing, idea
 Verb – Expresses action, being or state of being
 Pronoun – Substitutes for a noun or group of nouns
 Adjective – Modifies/describes a noun/pronoun
 Adverb – Modifies/describes a verb, adjective or
another adverb
 Preposition – Introduces a phrase functioning as
an adjective or adverb
 Conjunction – Joins words or groups of words
 Interjection – Expresses emotion
 Article – Points to a noun

Other Important Concepts
Subject – Names who or what the
sentence is about, simple or complex
 Predicate (Verb) – Expresses the
action/being of the sentence
 Clause – A group of related words
containing a subject and a verb
 Phrase - A group of related words
without a subject-verb relationship

Sentence Structure



ALL sentences have a Subject and a Predicate
Both Subject and Predicate may be simple or
complex (w/ modifiers)
Sentences may have more than one subject and
more than one predicate.
Examples:
The product was delivered on time as promised. The
package even included a note from the vendor. Then
and there, the happy manager ordered another shipment.
Paragraph Structure
Topic sentence with support sentences
(details and examples)
 Usually topic sentence comes first
 Front load vs. back load
 Start a paragraph when you introduce a
new topic sentence

Common Grammar Problems



Clause Confusion
Disagreement Between Elements
Unclear Meaning
Independent and Dependent Clauses

Independent Clause
– Can stand alone and still
make sense
– Can be used alone as a
sentence
– Can be used as part of a
compound sentence w/
other clauses

Dependent Clause
– MUST be connected to an
independent clause for
meaning
– Function as adverb or
adjective
– Use “subordinating
conjunction” (although,
because, if, which, who, etc.)
Example: If the contract
meets your approval,
please sign the copies
and return them to me.
Example: If the contract
meets your approval,
please sign the copies
and return them to me.
Clause Confusion: Run-Ons

Problem: Independent clauses joined
incorrectly with other clauses.
 Cause: Missing punctuation and/or
conjunctions
Incorrect: I need the insurance paperwork back
as soon as possible the coverage begins
early next month.
Incorrect: But we discussed last week you will
have full coverage for yourself and family.
Clause Confusion: Run-Ons

Solution: Find where the clauses join. Then
decide how you want to use the first
independent clause:
– Alone as a complete sentence with end
punctuation
– With another independent clause as a
compound sentence, either with a comma and
conjunction OR a semicolon
– With a dependent clause in a complete
sentence (adding a subordinate conjunction)
Clause Confusion: Run-Ons
Incorrect: I need the insurance paperwork back
as soon as possible the coverage begins
early next month.
Correct: I need the insurance paperwork
back as soon as possible. The coverage
begins early next month.
Incorrect: But we discussed last week you will
have full coverage for yourself and family.
Correct: But as we discussed last week, you
will have full coverage for yourself and
family.
Clause Confusion: Sentence Fragments

Problem: Phrases are used as independent
clauses OR dependent clauses are used alone,
without an independent clause
 Cause: Fragments are not complete sentences
or have subordinating conjunctions without
anything to modify.
Incorrect: The patient uninsured at this time and now
unable to make payment.
Incorrect: Since the due date is past and collection is
requested.
Clause Confusion: Sentence Fragments

Solution: Check for a missing subject or
predicate. Look for a subordinate
conjunction. Then:
– Add or link the dependent clause to an
independent clause OR
– Convert the fragment to an independent
clause by dropping the subordinate
conjunction and adding the needed subject
or predicate
Clause Confusion: Sentence Fragments
Incorrect: The patient uninsured at this time and
now unable to make payment.
Incorrect: Since the due date is past and
collection is requested.
Correct: The patient is uninsured at this time
and is now unable to make payment. Since
the due date is past, collection is
requested.
Disagreement: Subject - Verb


Problem: Confusion over whether the subject is
singular or plural, especially when words come
between the subject and the verb OR when the
verb comes before the subject
Cause: Verbs must agree with their subjects in
number (singular/plural) and in person (1st/2nd/3rd)
Incorrect: The patient, along with her family,
request an extension or waiver.
Incorrect: The guidelines for billing does not allow
an exception in such cases unless a manager
approve an override.
Disagreement: Subject - Verb

Solution: Find the subject (not its
complement) and the verb. Change
the verb to agree with the subject in
number and in person.
Disagreement: Subject - Verb
Incorrect: The patient, along with her family, request
an extension or waiver.
Correct: The patient, along with her family,
requests an extension or waiver.
Incorrect: The guidelines for billing does not allow
an exception in such cases unless a manager
approve an override.
Correct: The guidelines for billing do not allow
an exception in such cases unless a manager
approves an override.
Disagreement: Compound Subjects


Problem: Confusion over whether to treat compound
subjects as singular or plural.
Cause: Different conjunctions result in different
treatment. Also, “either” and “neither” may be used
alone a indefinite pronouns rather than conjunctions.
Incorrect: Dr. Williams, Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones wants to
participate in this week’s training.
Incorrect: Neither Dr. Williams nor the others has their
application completed.
Incorrect: However, everyone have submitted the
registration fee.
Disagreement: Compound Subjects

Solution: Find the compound subject
– If joined with “and”, treat as plural.
– If joined with “or/nor”, use the subject
nearest the verb to determine the
agreement.
– If an indefinite pronoun, treat as singular.
Disagreement: Compound Subjects
Incorrect: Dr. Williams, Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones wants to
participate in this week’s training.
Incorrect: Neither Dr. Williams nor the others has their
application completed.
Incorrect: However, everyone have submitted the
registration fee.
Correct: Dr. Williams, Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones want to
participate in this week’s training.
Correct: Neither Dr. Williams nor the others have their
application completed.
Correct: However, everyone has submitted the
registration fee.
Disagreement: Pronoun - Antecedent


Problem: The pronoun does not match the noun it
references (its antecedent) for number or gender; Sexist
language may also be used.
Cause: Confusion over whether the antecedent is
singular or plural; Assuming an individual or group is one
gender or another based on bias.
Incorrect: The board members finished its meeting on
schedule.
Incorrect: The chairperson and members were surprised;
he thought it would take longer.
Incorrect: Every professional relishes it when he completes
a project successfully.
Disagreement: Pronoun - Antecedent


Solution: Find the antecedent. Ensure that the pronoun
matches for number and gender.
– Treat indefinite antecedents (e.g. anyone, somebody),
generic nouns and collective nouns as singular.
– Treat compound antecedents connected by “and” as
plural.
– For compound antecedents connected by “or/nor”, make
the pronoun agree with the nearer antecedent
– Use gender neutral pronouns when possible
Hint: It may be easier to change the antecedent than the
pronoun
Disagreement: Pronoun - Antecedent
Incorrect: The board members finished its meeting on
schedule.
Incorrect: The chairperson and members were surprised;
he thought it would take longer.
Incorrect: Every professional relishes it when he
completes a project successfully.
Correct: The board members finished their meeting
on schedule.
Correct: The chairperson and members were
surprised; they thought it would take longer.
Correct: Professionals relish it when they complete a
project successfully.
Disagreement – Ambiguous Pronouns


Problem: It is unclear which antecedent a pronoun
references
Cause: There are a number of possible causes
– More than one antecedent is present
– The pronoun is not close to the antecedent
– An implied antecedent is referenced
– “That” or “which” is used to refer to persons
Incorrect: Jill had a fight at work and had to meet with
her supervisor, Joan, about it. It made her mad.
Incorrect: Joan didn’t know which was to blame, Jill or
her co-worker.
Disagreement – Ambiguous Pronouns

Solution: Replace the pronoun with a noun or
move the pronoun closer to the antecedent.
Use “who”, “whom” or “whose” when referring
to persons.
 Hint: Try moving the pronoun first to avoid
repetitive words/phrases (e.g. using a
person’s name repeatedly).
Disagreement – Ambiguous Pronouns
Incorrect: Jill had a fight at work and had to meet with her
supervisor, Joan, about it. It made her mad.
Incorrect: Joan didn’t know which was to blame, Jill or her
co-worker.
Correct: Jill had a fight at work and had to meet with
her supervisor, Joan, about it. The fight made Joan
mad.
Correct: Joan didn’t know who was to blame, Jill or
her co-worker.
Unclear Meaning: Misplaced Modifiers

Problem: Confusion over which word or words
are modified or how they are modified
 Cause: Modifiers are placed too far away from
what they modify
Incorrect: The first patient rushed past the
pharmacist beating the other patients to the
counter.
Incorrect: The patient almost spent $200.
Unclear Meaning: Misplaced Modifiers
Solution: Move the modifier closer to the
word or words it modifies.
 Hint: Sometimes punctuation may also
work, by setting off a dependent clause or
phrase.

Unclear Meaning: Misplaced Modifiers
Incorrect: The first patient rushed past the
pharmacist beating the other patients to the
counter.
Incorrect: The patient almost spent $200.
Correct: Rushing past the pharmacist, the
first patient beat the other patients to the
counter.
Incorrect: The patient spent almost $200.
Unclear Meaning: Dangling Modifiers

Problem: Introductory or closing modifying
phrases that do not name the subject
modified.
 Cause: The modifier implies the wrong
subject is modified.
Incorrect: Writing quickly, the prescription was
completed without looking up.
Incorrect: The patient left the doctor flying out
of the room.
Unclear Meaning: Dangling Modifiers

Solution: The sentence must be rewritten.
(Moving the modifier will not help.)
– Name the word/words being modified in the
subject of the independent clause OR
– Place the word/words being modified within
the modifying phrase.
Unclear Meaning: Dangling Modifiers
Incorrect: Writing quickly, the prescription was
completed without looking up.
Incorrect: The patient left the doctor flying out
of the room.
Correct: Writing quickly, the doctor
completed the prescription without
looking up.
Correct: The patient flew out of the room as
he left the doctor.
Unclear Meaning: Passive Voice
Passive voice emphasizes who/what is
receiving the action rather than
who/what is doing the action.
 So decide where the emphasis should
be on the actor or the receiver. If the
actor is more important, write in active
voice. If the receiver is more important,
write in passive voice.

Unclear Meaning: Passive Voice
Passive: The results of the procedure were not
adequately documented by the clinic.
Active: The clinic did not adequately document
the results of the procedure.
Passive: The procedure will need to be
rescheduled by the clinic free of charge.
Active: The clinic will need to reschedule the
procedure free of charge.
Punctuation Problems





Commas
Semicolons
Colons
Apostrophes
Quotes
However he said it
didn’t matter you
are wrong anyway.
She shrugged and
left him slowly
walking from the
office. Why he
didn’t know.
Punctuation Problems
Punctuation problems affect flow and
readability
 Punctuation problems MAY affect meaning
 Punctuation problems may reflect on
professionalism and credibility

Punctuation: Commas

After an introductory phrase
– Before you begin, please review the project
history.
– However, don’t spend too much time in
review.
– As we are in a hurry, a quick overview would
be fine.

Exception: Very short introductions
– Then we can begin.
Punctuation: Commas

Set off transitional phrases at the beginning
and middle of sentences
–
–
–
–
Typically w/ “however,” “therefore,” “for
example,” “in other words,” etc.
The cost, as estimated by our accountant, is well
within allowances.
However, we may find it difficult to order by the
deadline.
The problem, therefore, is one of timeliness.
Punctuation: Commas

Separate items in horizontal lists w/ the
final comma before the conjunction
usually optional
– The manager is responsible for hiring,
training, supervision and evaluation.
– She also interacts with Personnel, Research
and Design, and Operations.
Punctuation: Commas

Set off non-essential phrases or appositives
(but not w/ essential info)
– The contract, which was signed this week, gives the
company full and immediate ownership.
– We have already had meetings with the Director of
Operations, Bob Smith.
– However, the board’s final decision that was made
before the acquisition will have to be addressed
immediately.
Punctuation: Commas

Use with conjunctions to join
independent clauses
– We received your letter, but I am unclear
as to your what you are requesting.
– Contact me with additional details, and I
will address your concerns directly.

Exception: Short independent clauses
– Call me or e-mail me.
Punctuation: Commas

Use w/ quotations, dates, addresses and
numbers
– “On October 21, 2004, we will be making a
change,” the message read. “Our new
offices will be at 200 South Grant Avenue,
Beaverton, Oregon. We are expecting
approximately 20,000 visitors in the first
year.”
Punctuation: Semicolons

Join independent clauses w/out a conjunction
– It seemed it would last forever; it didn’t.
– Some do; some don’t.

Use to separate items in a series that already
includes punctuation
– Several world leaders participated including George
Bush, President of the U.S.; Tony Blair, Prime
Minister of England; and Jacques Chirac, President
of France.
– The witness heard various people shout: “Hey!”;
“Stop!”; and “Don’t do that!”
Punctuation: Colons

After an independent clause to introduce one
or more directly related ideas, including lists,
quotations and directions.
– This year’s election features three main
candidates: McCain, Clinton and Obama.
– There are a number of potential writing problems:
•
•
•
•
Grammar
Punctuation
Spelling
Diction
Punctuation: Colons

After business salutations
– Dear Ms. Smith:

In time of day using numeric form
– The workshop will begin at 1:30 pm.
– The operation began at 22:10 on April 5,
2002.
Punctuation: Apostrophes

Add ’s for nouns that do not end in s or
singular nouns that end in s
– A car’s convenience does not outweigh a
bus’s economy.

Add ’ for plural nouns that end in s
– The drivers’ decision depends on which is
more important to them.
Punctuation: Apostrophes

Add ’ or ’s with the last element in joint
possession or compound nouns
– John and Mary’s house should bring a
good price.

Exception: To show individual
possession, make all possessive
– However, John’s and Mary’s willingness to
sell is a big question.
Punctuation: Apostrophes

Use ’s with indefinite pronouns, but not
with definite pronouns
– While it was anyone’s guess, his intuition
turned out to be accurate.
Punctuation: Quotations





Quotation marks set off direct quotes
Commas and periods go inside quotation
marks
Colons and semicolons go outside quotation
marks
Question and exclamation marks go inside if
part of the quoted material.
Capitalize beginnings of quotes UNLESS the
quote is blended into the sentence.
Punctuation: Quotations
– “Hey!” the man shouted. “Where is my car?”
– The attendant smiled and said, “I don’t know. I just got
on shift.”
– “That shouldn’t matter,” argued the customer, “since
you’ve given all cars a numbered parking space.”
– Later, the man admitted that using that parking lot
“…wasn’t the best choice I’ve ever made.”
Punctuation: Quotations

Use the ellipsis mark to indicate material not
included
– According to Smith, “The results of the study…were
surprising and unexpected.”

Use the bracket to indicate material added
– Smith attributes this to “the varying methods [used
by three different research teams] to gather and
analyze the data.”
– “The next project,” the director stated, “will not have
such varience [sic] as new controls are in place.”
Spelling Problems
Spelling errors affect meaning,
readability, credibility and
professionalism. They also may
demonstrate a lack of care and
concern for the document.
Spelling: I before E

I before E …
– Achievement, patient, chief

Except after C …
– Perceive, receipt, receive

And in the sound “ay” as in hay
– Neighbor, weigh, freight

Exceptions
– Either, neither, height, foreign, leisure, seize, weird
Spelling: Plurals






Add s to most words (computers, cats)
Add es to words ending in s, ch, sh and x
(tosses, catches, mashes, boxes)
Add s to words ending in y after a vowel or in
proper names (trays, Kennedys)
Add ies to words ending in y after a
consonant (companies, pennies)
Add s to words ending in o after a vowel
(videos, radios)
Add es to words ending in o after a
consonant (heroes, zeroes)
Spelling: Plurals
For compound words, add s or es as
appropriate to the major word in the
compound (sisters-in-law, border collies)
 Use ‘s to pluralize numbers, letters and
abbreviations (8’s, p’s and q’s, I.D.’s)

Spelling: Prefixes

Adding a prefix does not change the root
spelling
– Misspent, unnecessary, disappointed
Spelling: Suffixes

Silent e
– Drop the silent e when adding a suffix
beginning with a vowel (advancing,
believable)
– Keep the silent e when adding a suffix
beginning with a consonant (achievement,
likeness) unless the silent e follows a vowel
(arguing, truly)
Spelling: Suffixes

Double the consonant when adding a
suffix beginning with a vowel IF:
– The final consonant is preceded by a single
vowel AND
– The consonant ends a stressed syllable or
one-syllable word
– (Beginning, committed, occurrence)
Spelling: Exceptions

British/Canadian spellings may vary
– Cancelled, colour, cheque, centre, defence,
realise

Some other spelling exceptions
– Changeable, mobile, dying

Check dictionary for alternative/difficult
spellings
Proofreading
Purpose: Locate and mark errors and needed
changes in a document.








Approach w/ “fresh eyes”
Know why you are proofreading
Proof for the audience
Mark problems; don’t fix them
Look for needed changes only
Read both silently and aloud
Proofread in “chunks”
Proof multiple times
Proofreading for Revision
Purpose: Check content and order for clarification or
restatement







Read for overview
Determine purpose of the document
Find the main point or thesis
Find the evidence or details
Check paragraph order and “weight”
Proof paragraphs for relevance and flow
Repeat as necessary
Proofreading for Editing
Purpose: Find sentence-level problems and
mechanical errors






Proofread at least twice
Check your problem areas first
Find topic sentences before supports
Ensure 1 topic sentence per paragraph
Check spelling separate from grammar
Use but don’t trust writing assistants
Proofreading Tips







Accept that most drafts are not perfect
Plan/schedule for proofreading
Proof electronically AND hard copy
Proofread multiple times
Read your document aloud
Have someone else proofread
Practice proofreading
AND …
Proofreading Tips (Cont.)

Organize your proofreading:
– Proof in sections. Complete a section before
moving on.
– Proof for revision first. Make revisions. Then
proof for editing.
– Proof general to specific (Paragraph –
Sentence – Word – Punctuation)
– Read backwards (especially for editing)
Proofreading for Grammar
(Sentence Level)








When proofing and editing, focus on meaning and clarity
Know your grammatical weaknesses, and check those first
Read a sentence aloud to confirm “verbal grammar”
Look for shifts in voice, person and tense
Identify subject, predicate, clauses and phrases within a
sentence
Quickly cover the basics:
– Complete sentences (and ideas)
– Agreement between elements
– Clear and appropriate modifying phrases
– Correct punctuation
Use the writing assistants to find likely errors (but check
again for yourself)
Keep a good grammar guide handy
Revising Strategies

Focus
– Clarify introduction of main “thesis”
– Check for competing ideas
– Delete unnecessary text

Content
– Emphasize main ideas
– Add facts, details, examples, definitions
– Rethink central argument/insight

Point of View
– Maintain consistency
– Change POV?
Revising Strategies (Cont.)

Organization
– Add/sharpen topic sentences
– Move blocks of text
– Re-paragraph

Audience Appeal
– Use appropriate tone/language
– Let the readers know why they are reading
– Motivate the readers to read on

The “Rule of Ones”
Editing Strategies: Movement

Check paragraphs
– Topic sentence followed by support sentences
– Transitional sentences/phrases

Arrange paragraphs appropriately
–
–
–
–

Time (chronological, narrative, process)
Space (descriptive, setting)
Dramatic (build to climax, back load)
Logic (argument, essay)
Link ideas
Paragraph Structure
Topic sentence with support sentences
(details and examples)
 Usually topic sentence comes first
 Start a paragraph when you introduce a
new topic sentence
 Front load vs. back load
 Tip: When proofing, mark all topic
sentences to check paragraphing

Editing Strategies: Linking Ideas

Use key words
– Repetition
– Variety

Maintain parallel structures
– Similar info presented in similar ways
– “Visual” balance

Check for consistent style
– Between paragraphs/chapters/sections
– Subject identity
– Perspective
Editing Strategies: Transitions
Use “roadmap” sentences/paragraphs
 Choose appropriate phrases

– Addition (and, also, further, in addition to, moreover, next,
too)
– Compare (also, in the same manner, in this way, like,
likewise, similarly)
– Contrast (although, but, even though, however, in
contrast, nevertheless, still)
– Summary (In conclusion, in other words, in short,
therefore, to sum up)
– Relation [time, order, place] (after, as, during, finally, later,
when, first, second, next, last, above, beyond, farther on,
near, opposite)
– Logic (as a result, consequently, if, since, so, therefore,
thus)
Editing Strategies: Sentence Level

Correct grammar
–
–
–
–
–
–

Sentence fragments
Run-on sentence (fused, comma splice)
Subject-Verb agreement
Pronoun references and agreement
Misused modifiers
Active vs. passive voice
Correct spelling and punctuation
Editing with the 7 Cs
Correct
 Consistent
 Clear
 Coherent
 Concise
 Complete
 Creative

Correct
Are my facts and dates right?
 Is the math right?
 Are any names or words misspelled?
 Are there any glaring grammatical
mistakes?

Consistent

If a word has multiple correct spellings,
have I used the same spelling
throughout the document?
– Example: cancelled or canceled

Have I applied the same grammatical
style throughout the document?
– Example: using a comma before “and” in a
series

Have I abbreviated consistently?
– Example: OR or Ore.
Choosing Words
Fancy words
 Abbreviate
 Ascertain
 Anticipate
 Procure
 Duplicate
 Facilitate
 Feasible
 Terminate
Simple Words
Shorten
Find out, get
Expect
Get, buy
Copy
Ease, help
Possible
End
Choosing Words
Fancy Words
 Optimum
 Indicate
 Attempt
 Obtain
 Commence
 Demonstrate
 Locate
Simple Words
Best
Tell, say, show
Try
Get
Begin
Show
Find
Clear
Does it say what I want it to say?
 Is it straightforward and easy to
understand?
 Have I used simple words?
 Are my sentences too long or
confusing?
 Have I used jargon?

Coherent
Does it get to the point?
 Does it present information in a logical
flow?
 Is it easy to follow the information path
to the action I want?
 Have I used subheadings to guide my
reader?

Concise
Have I used unnecessary phrases?
 Can I make the same point with fewer
words?
 Have I used redundant phrasing?

Cut, cut, cut
Has
the opportunity to
In the event that
Start off
In regard to
In the very near future
Actual experience
As a general rule
Close proximity
Different varieties
Can
If
Start
About
Soon
Experience
As
a rule
Near
Variety
Cut, cut, cut
Due
to the fact that
Group meeting
First and foremost
At the same time as
Range all the way from
In order to
New breakthrough
Personal opinion
Because
Meeting
First
When
Range
from
To
Breakthrough
Opinion
Complete
Have I included all the information that
the reader will need?
 Have I answered who, what, when,
where, why, how much?
 Have I answered the questions the
reader is likely to have?

Creative
Use examples to help draw connections
 Use active verbs that move the reader
 Make comparisons
 Use nouns instead of adjectives

Specific Problems to Consider
Diction
 Paragraph Structure
 Document Design
 Style
 Liability

Also Think About …






Utilizing a peer review
Testing documents on sample audiences
Requesting feedback from target audience(s)
Developing measurements of effectiveness
Rotating assignments to assess strengths
and weaknesses of writing staff
Group writing for projects
Suggested Resources for Grammar and Style

Keys for Writers: A Brief Handbook
By Ann Raimes

How 12 (Handbook for Office Workers)
By James L. Clark, Lyn R. Clark

The American Heritage® Book of English Usage

The Elements of Style
By William Strunk
On-line at http://www.bartleby.com/141/index.html

Common Errors in English
On-line at http://www.wsu.edu/~brians/errors/

Merriam-Webster Dictionary & Thesaurus
On-line at http://www.m-w.com/dictionary.htm