Plain language

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Transcript Plain language

Federal Aviation
Administration
Plain Language
Briefing:
NHCFAE
Bruce Corsino
FAA Plain Language
Program Manager
This is a short briefing.
It is NOT the
FAA Plain Language Course.
Principles of Plain Language
Federal Aviation
Administration
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What Is Plain Language?
Helps Users:
Find what they need;
Understand what they find
the FIRST time they read or hear it;
Use what they find to meet their needs;
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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What Is Plain Language?
Is NOT a solution to every problem
Don’t write for everyone -Write only for your READER
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Reader-Focused Writing
It’s not what you write---it’s what
your reader UNDERSTANDS!
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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How long has some of
the world been asking
for plain language??
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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The Honeymooners and Words Video
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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“The most valuable of all
talents is that of never
using two words when one
will do…”
Thomas Jefferson
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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False Assumptions
More words are better
Bigger words are better
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Principles of Plain Language
Federal Aviation
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WWII Air Raid memo from U.S. Gov’t:
“Preparations shall be made as will completely
obscure all Federal and non Federal buildings
occupied by the Federal Government during an
air raid for any period of time from visibility by
reason of internal or external illumination. Such
obscuration may be obtained either by blackout construction or by termination of the
illumination.”
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Federal Aviation
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President Roosevelt’s revision:
“During an air raid, put something
over the windows in buildings where
they have to keep the work going.
In buildings where they can let the
work stop for a while, turn out the
lights.”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Grade Level and
Readability Checks
• Reader’s Digest = 65
• Time Magazine = 52
• Harvard Law Review = 30
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Why use plain language?
•
•
•
•
•
•
Saves Time, Staff and Money
Improves Compliance
Affects Customer Satisfaction
Prevents Lawsuits
Saves Lives
Policy, Law and a Civil Right!
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Saves Customer and Staff Time
Old letter New letter
Calls per month
(per counselor)
9.4
1.6
Calls per year
(10 counselors)
1128
192
Department of Veterans Affairs form letter:
Customer Calls after Plain Language revision
(See: VA Regional Office, Jackson, MS, Jan 1999)
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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FAA Broadcast
“Automated Transit Benefits
Application System”
vs.
“Your transit benefits will stop
unless you…”
+50%
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Plain Language Prevents Lawsuits
1. Dept. of Health and Human Services
2. Federal Aviation Administration
(Airworthiness Directives)
3. Customs and Immigration Service
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Federal Aviation
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Where should an applicant submit his or her application to reregister, late initial register, or renew temporary treatment benefits?
If you are re-registering and have previously filed with the Vermont Service Center, the Form I-821, Form
I-765, fees, and all supporting documentation should be filed at the USCIS Chicago Lockbox at: U.S. Citizenship and
Immigration Services, P.O. Box 6943, Chicago, IL 60680-6943.
Or, for non-United States Postal Service (USPS) deliveries: U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, Attn:
TPS/VSC, 427 S. LaSalle--3rd Floor, Chicago, IL 60605.
If you are re-registering and have previously filed with either the California Service Center, Texas Service
Center, or Nebraska Service Center or if you are filing a late initial registration, the Form I-821, Form I-765, fees, and all
supporting documentation should be filed at the USCIS Chicago Lockbox at: U.S. Citizenship and Immigration
Services, Attn: TPS El Salvador, P.O. Box 87583, Chicago, IL 60680-0583.
Or, for non-United States Postal Service (USPS) deliveries: U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, Attn:
TPS El Salvador, 427 S. LaSalle--3rd Floor, Chicago, IL 60605.
Please note that this is not the location where you have submitted your forms during previous reregistration periods. Also, there are two different P.O. Boxes listed. Failure to use the appropriate P.O. Box may delay
processing your TPS application. Aliens re-registering or late initial registering for TPS under the designation of El
Salvador should not send their TPS forms and fees directly to a USCIS Service Center or district office. Failure to follow
these instructions may delay processing of your TPS application.
Aliens re-registering for TPS under the designation of El Salvador during the re-registration period from
January 7, 2005, to March 8, 2005, may file the Form I-821, I-765 and fees electronically by using E-filing at the USCIS
Web site, http://www.uscis.gov. In order to properly re-register using E-filing, aliens must start the electronic filing
with Form I-821, and the system will then link the alien to Form I-765 once Form I-821 is complete. Aliens re-registering
for TPS after March 8, 2005, or aliens late initial registering may not file electronically, and must send their application
materials to the USCIS Chicago Lockbox. Failure to follow these instructions may result in an incomplete filing and
delay processing of your TPS application.
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Federal Aviation
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Where should I submit my application for TPS?
Table 3 - Application Mailing Directions
If
Then Mail to
Or, for Non-United
States Postal Service
(USPS) deliveries, Mail
to
You are applying for reregistration or applying to
renew your temporary
treatment benefits
U.S. Citizenship and
Immigration Services Attn:
TPS El Salvador
P.O. Box 8635
Chicago, IL 60680-8635
U.S. Citizenship and Immigration
Services
Attn: TPS El Salvador
427 S. LaSalle--3rd Floor Chicago, IL
60605-1029
You are applying for TPS
for the first time, as a late
initial registrant, or you
were granted TPS by an
Immigration Judge or the
Board of Immigration
Appeals
U.S. Citizenship and
Immigration Services Attn:
TPS El Salvador
P.O. Box 8670 Chicago, IL
60680-8670
U.S. Citizenship and Immigration
Services
Attn: TPS El Salvador
[EOIR/Additional Documents] or [Late
Initial Registrant]
427 S. LaSalle--3rd Floor, Chicago, IL
60605-1029
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Federal Aviation
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Principles of Plain Language
Federal Aviation
Administration
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2010 Federal Plain Writing Act
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Federal Aviation
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Federal Requirements
1. train all agency employees
2. insure each covered document you
issue or revise complies with the
Federal Plain Language Guidelines
3. create a plain language website
4. appoint a plain language official
5. report to Congress
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Federal Aviation
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How do you learn Plain Language?
Plain Language Course
Plain Language Tool Kit
Practice and vigilence
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Plain Language Desktop Toolkit
Contains:
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•
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Word Tools
Formatting Tools
General Guidance & References
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Federal Aviation
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Format Tools
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Federal Aviation
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Plain Language Format Tools
USE:
Headings
Bullet Lists
Illustrations
Q & A formats
Blank Space
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use Headings and Lists
Each map must be based on
assumptions regarding numbers
of aircraft, aircraft types and mix,
nighttime operations, airport
layout, runway use, flight tracks,
operational data, and compatible
land uses.
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Federal Aviation
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Use Headings and Lists
Map Instructions
Your map must include:
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•
•
•
number of aircraft
aircraft types and mix
nighttime operations
airport layout
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Federal Aviation
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Use Headings and Lists
Statement Headings:
Your map must include:
Topic Headings:
Map Instructions
Question Headings:
What must my map include?
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use Chunking for Long Lists
How to make an apple pie:
Dry Ingredients
--Wet Ingredients
--Cooking Instructions
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Why Chunking Matters
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use “Q & A” or “If-Then” Formats
We must receive your completed
expense form on or before the 15th
day of the second month following the
month you are reporting if send your
form by mail or fax, or the 25th day of
the second month following the month
you are reporting if you submit your
form electronically.
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Federal Aviation
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Use “Q & A” or “If-Then” Formats
When do I send my completed form?
IF you send
your form:
THEN we must get it by:
electronically the 25th day of the second
month following the month
you are reporting.
By mail or fax the 15th day of the second
month following the month
you are reporting.
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Federal Aviation
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Use Tables
Ferrier has 11 years of experience, has
bid $29 million, and estimates completing
the work in three years. Sokol has 5 years
of experience, bid $27 million, and
estimates completing the work in 30
months. Crane has 8 years experience,
bid $28 million, and estimates completing
the work in three years.
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Federal Aviation
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Use Tables
Contractor Comparisons
CONTRACTOR
EXPERIENCE
BID PRICE
COMPLETION
Ferrier
11 years
$29 million
36 months
Sokol
5 years
$27 million
30 months
Crane
9 years
$28 million
36 months
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Federal Aviation
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Word Tools
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Federal Aviation
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Plain Language Word Tools
Everyday Words
Verbs
Pronouns
Contractions
Active Voice Sentences
“Must” vs. “Shall
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Federal Aviation
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Most Important
Word Tools
--Use Pronouns
--Use Active Voice
--Free Your Verbs
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use Pronouns
• Identify who is acting
• Eliminate words/reduce time
• Makes your writing relevant/personal
The Agency =
We
The Reader =
You
The Writer =
I
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Federal Aviation
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No Pronouns
This form must be completed by anyone
requiring a badge and submitted to the
security office. The badge applicant,
sponsor (manager), and ACE-700 must
complete it prior to issuance of any
badge. POC: Bldg Mgr x3127.
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Federal Aviation
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With Five Pronouns
If you need a badge, you must
fill out this form. Your manager
and ACE-700 must also fill it
out. Submit your form to the
security office. If you have
questions, call the building
manager on ext. 3127.
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Federal Aviation
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Use Pronouns Correctly!!
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Federal Aviation
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Free Your Verbs
Utilize =
Use
Promulgate =
Issue
Implement =
Start
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Free Your Verbs
give a description of =
describe
provide assistance with =
assist / help
do the construction of =
construct / build
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use ACTIVE voice
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Passive Voice
is NOT
Past Tense!
Use past tense!
Don’t use passive voice!
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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What is Passive Voice?

The person doing the action follows the verb.
 A form of the verb “to be” is combined with the
past participle of another verb.
John swallowed the fish.
The fish was swallowed by John.
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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The Weakness of Passive Voice
“Financial compensation will be provided.”
-Do I get the money??
-Who gives it to me??
We will pay you.
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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The Weakness of Passive Voice
“Safety Instructions Must Be Given.”
-Does it say who gives the instructions??
-Does it say who gets them??
“You must give safety instructions
to your passengers…”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Use ACTIVE voice & Pronouns
Rebates are to be mailed to all
taxpayers.
You will get a rebate.
A day-off will be granted by the
agency.
We will give you a day-off.
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Federal Aviation
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Change Passive to Active Voice
A pieman was met by Simple Simon.
Simple Simon met a pieman.
The candlestick was jumped over by
Jack.
Jack jumped over the candlestick.
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Federal Aviation
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Use Active Voice
“Mistakes were made.”
“I made mistakes.”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Change Active to Passive Voice
An old lady lived in a shoe.
A shoe was lived in by an old lady.
“Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled
peppers”
“A peck of pickled peppers was
picked by Peter Piper.”
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Federal Aviation
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Why Passive Causes Pain
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Federal Aviation
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Why Passive Causes Pain
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Federal Aviation
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Should You Ever Use
Passive Voice?
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Federal Aviation
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FINAL EXAM
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Federal Aviation
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Use Everyday Words
interface =
be with—talk to
clearly necessitates=
needs
expeditious =
fast
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Free Your Verbs
I made a choice to =
I chose
I’ll be facilitating the process =
I will facilitate / help
we’ll conduct an analysis of =
we will analyze / study
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Federal Aviation
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Which is passive?
• shall deliver
• is delivered
• is delivering
• may deliver
--is delivered.
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Federal Aviation
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Which is passive?
• will write
• is writing
• has written
• was written
--was written.
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Federal Aviation
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What’s the Active Voice Version?
The boy was bitten by the dog.
--The dog bit the boy.
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Federal Aviation
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What’s the Active Voice Version?
Notification was made to the
public by the FAA.
--The FAA notified the public.
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Federal Aviation
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What’s the Active Version?
The small stuff does not
need to be sweat.
--Don’t sweat the small stuff…
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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What’s the Active Version?
The attendees will
be entertained by us.
--We will rock you.
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Hollywood: Plain Language Tactics
The Schwarzenegger tool:
“I’ll be back.”
The Clint Eastwood tool:
“Make my day.”
The Nicholson-Cruise tool (A Few Good Men):
“You can’t handle the truth!”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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True or False?
Is this Plain Language?
“—a sudden, unauthorized
descent to an altitude below
that of the runway.”
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Federal Aviation
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You be
the
Plain Language Expert
For: The FAA
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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“Elevators shall not be
used in case of fire or
electrical emergency.”
“Use designated exits”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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“If there’s an emergency
in this building, don’t use
these elevators.
Use the exits.
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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You be
the
Plain Language Expert
For: The Bus/Metro System
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Bus Sign:
“These seats must be
vacated for seniors and
disabled persons”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Bus Sign:
“You must give these
seats to seniors and
disabled persons”
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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You be
the
Plain Language Expert
For: NASA
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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NASA: “O-Ring” Memos
“—O-ring temperature
limits have been achieved.”
VS.
“—If you launch below 32°,
the O-rings will fail!”
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Federal Aviation
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Bonus Question:
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Plain Language
in
Real Documents
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Aircraft Exit Row Instructions
FAA Advisory Circular
FAA Webpages
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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U.S. Postal Service
Netflix
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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PLAIN LANGUAGE GIVES YOU:
• Saved time and money for
customers and staff
• Better comprehension, safety and
compliance
• Improved customer satisfaction
• Is a Civil Right! May be the Law!
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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Hispanic Issues
in
Plain Language?
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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THANK YOU!
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Federal Aviation
Administration
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