Transcript News writing and story structures ideas: The lead

News writing and
story structures ideas:
The lead
Chris Roush
University of North Carolina at Chapel
Hill
[email protected]
2008 UNC Newspaper Academy
The Lead
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The lead is vital to any writing, whether one is
writing a novel, a short story, a book review, a
term paper, a newspaper editorial, or a
homily to be read in church on Sunday
morning.- syndicated newspaper columnist
James J. Kilpatrick.
The Lead
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The lead, or the first sentence/paragraph, or
a story is the most important.
Why? Many times, a reader will decide
whether to read the story based on the first
paragraph.
Many writes agonize over the lead
paragraph.
The lead
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The lead is the bait to hook the reader.
By educating, entertaining or enlightening, it
stimulates the reader to pay attention.
The leader shows relevance.
It also entraps.
A publisher once wrote that a lead must be
provocative, vigorous and even at times
startling to the reader.
The lead
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I have some specific rules when it comes to
writing leads that I think are helpful to any
writer using any form of mass
communication.
These lead rules are effective not only in
journalism but also in public relations and
advertising.
Rule No. 1
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The lead sentence should be no more than
35 words.
If it’s any longer, you will start to lose the
reader.
Ok with 36 or 37 words, but 40 is too much.
If you can’t convey your message in that
many words, then you’re not doing your job.
Rule No. 1
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An American Press Institute study shows that reader
understanding drops off dramatically if the sentence
exceeds 20 words.
Only about one of 20 people studied could clearly
comprehend 50-word sentences, a common length
in newspapers and in academic writing.
Short-term memory rarely exceeds 15 words.
A prize-winning story by World War II journalist Ernie
Pyle had an average sentence length of 10.6 words.
Rule No. 1
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Calvin Trillin of The New Yorker wrote about
the most-famous lead written by Edna
Buchanan.
Buchanan is a famous Miami Herald cops
reporter who won a Pulitzer prize.
She is known for her leads that grabbed
reader’s attention.
Rule No. 1
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Trillin Wrote, “In the newsroom of the Miami Harold, there is some disagreement
about which of Edna Buchanan’s first paragraphs stands as the classic Edna
lead. I line up with the fried-chicken faction. The fried-chicken story was about a
rowdy ex-con named Gary Robinson, who late on Sunday night lurched
drunkenly into a church’s outlet, shoved his way to the front of the line, and
ordered a three-piece box of fried-chicken. Persuaded to wait his turn, he
reached the counter again five or ten minutes later, only to be told that Church’s
had run out of fried chicken. The young woman at the counter suggest that he
might like chicken nuggets instead. Robin responded to the suggestion by
slugging her in the head. That set off a chain of events that ended with
Robinson’s being shot by a security guard. Edna Buchanan covered the murder
for the Harold--there are policemen in Miami who say that it wouldn’t be a
murder without her—and her story began with what the fried chicken faction still
regards as the classic Edna lead: “Gary Robinson died hungry.”
All connoisseurs would agree, I think that the classic Edna lead would have to
include one staple of crime reporting—the simple, matter-of-fact statement that
registers with a jolt.
Rule No. 2
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Always use active verbs.
Verbs are action words, but not all verbs are
active.
Some show no action at all, such as the verb
“to be” in all its forms—is, was, am, are,
were, be, being.
Such verbs are less interesting and harder to
visualize than active verbs.
Rule No. 2
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The best writers prefer active verbs because
that contain more information and sensory
detail.
“He was president” is vague compared with
“He dominated the country as president.”
Good writing if filled with active verbs that
evoke images in the mind of the reader or
listener.
Rule No. 2
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Here are some good examples:
“Lighter whacked the ball with such force that
it sailed over the outfield wall- his first home
run of the season.”
“Babies cried, children clamored, balls
thunked into holes, tickets ching-chingchinged into eager hands, the noise
competing against the Chuck E. Cheese
theme song in the background.”
Rule No. 3
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No strange punctuation in leads.
Commas and periods are fine, and I’m OK
with the dash, if it is used properly.
But there should be no colons, semi-colons
or parentheses.
This type of punctuation in the lead confuses
the reader.
Rule No. 3
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What does a reader think when he sees this
lead: “The CFO of a Fayetteville mining
company resigned his job Tuesday; the
company did not mane a replacement.”
The reader will get confused at the semi--colon. Do they stop reading? For how long?
When can they go on?
Rule No. 3
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Instead, write the lead mentioned the CFO
resigned and them ass the “why” to the lead.
Save the part that the company did not name
a replacement of the second paragraph. It’s a
separate concept.
Better lead: “The CFO of a Fayetteville
mining company resigned Tuesday amid
allegations of inflated earnings.”
Rule No. 4
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No specific names of people should be in the
lead unless they are will known to all of your
audience.
Mention the person’s title or descriptions in
the lead, and then you can use their name in
a later paragraph.
Using this in the lead bogs it down for the
reader.
Rule No. 4
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Here is an example:
“Doug Ivester, the chief executive officer of
Coca-Cola Co., resigned Sunday amid
disagreements with the board about the future
direction of the company.”
Does anybody know Ivester? Maybe only in Atlanta.
Rewrite to say:
“Coca-Cola Co.’s CEO resigned Sunday amid
disagreements about the future direction of the
company.”
Rule No. 5
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Don't ever use a quote in a lead.
It’s rare, if ever, that you find a quote that can
be used in a lead that can tell the reader what
the entire story is going to be about.
Quotes that high up in a story are the sign of
a weak writer unsure of what they’re writing
about.
Summarize the story first, and then use a
quote to back up your lead paragraph.
Rule No.6
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Let’s not begin a story with a question.
What does the reader do’ They answer the
question in their mind, and then they stop
reading.
That’s not what we want.
Questions are further down in the story,
particularly when used as a transition.
Rule No. 7
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Avoid introductory clauses in your lead.
They do not get he reader to the point of the
story.
Take the introductory clause and move it to
the end of the sentence, or move it to another
sentence furtherer down.
That will tell the reader what the store is
about first.
Writing the lead
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When you are writing a lead sentence, you’ll need to
consider what are the most important facts.
More than 90 percent of the time, the most
important fact will be the “what”—as in what
happened.
It’s typically followed by the “who” and the “why.”
The time element-the “when”- should always come
after the verb, never before.
Writing the lead
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After you have written your lead, go back and
look at it.
What fact is first? If it’s not the “what” fact,
are you sure you have the most important
fact first?
It’s OK to have the “who” fact first if you need
to say “what” happened to a person.
Writing the lead
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When I’m writing a lead, I like the employ
what I call the “six-word” rule.
If the reader isn’t being told what he story is
going to be about in the firs six words, then
the lead is not effective.
the “six-word” rule can also be applied in
another way.
Writing the lead
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Before you start writing your story, write in six
words or less what you want the story to
convey to the reader.
Those six words should be what the reader
gets as the general message in the lead.
For example: “Jerk CEO runs company into
ground” may not be your lead, but it helps a
writer synthesize what the lead should say.
Writing the lead
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When writing a lead sentence, writers should
also consider news values, or aspects of the
event that make it worth knowing about.
News values are qualities that interest people
in some way or another.
There are traditionally eight different news
values.
News Value No. 1
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The first one is prominence. We write stories
about people who are will known even when
minor events happen to them.
That’s why magazines such as People and
Us are so popular with some readers.
In North Carolina, it’s a well-known person
like Andy Griffith.
News Value No. 2
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The second news value is timeliness.
People want to know what is happening as
soon as it happens.
When writing leads, it’s important to give
readers the time element right after the verb.
We rarely write about events that happened
weeks, months or years ago in business
journalism.
News value No. 3
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The third news value is proximity.
We write about things that happen close to
where our audience resides.
You write about news events that happen in
North Carolina.
Do your readers care about news in Paris,
Texas? Not likely.
News value No. 4
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The forth news value in impact.
We write about events to show readers how
they are going to be affected.
The higher price of gas affects us all, as does
when workers go out of strike.
The impact needs to be translated into terms
the reader can understand.
News Value No. 5
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The fifth news value is magnitude.
The size of an event can determine its news
worthiness.
A loss of $5 billion by a company in one
quarter is an example of magnitude.
But if the same loss is a decline from the
previous quarter, does it have the same
magnitude?
News value No. 6
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The sixth news value is conflict.
There is always conflict is business stories.
It might be between two companies, such as
Coke vs. Pepsi.
Might be between the CEO and board.
Always search for the conflict, and place it
high in the story.
News value No.7
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The seventh news value is oddity.
Let’s face it, we like to read about strange
things that happen to people, or to
companies.
When a CEO is fired form a company
because he doesn't like to come into the
office, then that’s oddity.
News value No. 8
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The last news value is emotional impact.
People like stories that affect them
emotionally.
If a company is laying off workers, then there
is emotion in those people losing their jobs.
Convey to the reader what it’s like to be out
of work in the lead.
Lead types
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There are actually a number of different ways
to write lead sentences and paragraphs.
The most common is a summary lead, which
summarizes the most important information.
This serves readers who skim the paper.
Lead types
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Sometimes, a summary lead will try to
present multiple elements to a reader.
The best approach is to rank the elements,
putting the most important in the first
sentence.
Then, create a second or third paragraph to
present the other points.
Other types of leads
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Writing all summary leads to stories will make
a reporter boring and dull.
Write leads using a number of different lead
types.
Other formats can be better suited to the kind
of message that needs to be sent to the
reader.
Effective leads
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This type of lead focuses on a person.
A story about an economic problem can lead
with one person to illustrate how individuals
are affected.
The lead makes the reader feel the abstract
on a personal and emotional level.
The abstract becomes real.
Effective leads
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For example, I like to see affective leads on
stories about unemployment, or layoffs.
I also like to see affective leads about people
who are trying new products.
Affective leads can be quite effective in
business journalism.
Anecdotal leads
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Anecdotal leads put a human element in the
message.
They are often longer than affective leads,
but they tell a story and have a plot.
The delay the point of the story, but set up a
complex problem.
Anecdotal leads
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Anecdotal leads can be used effectively when
writing a profile of a CEO.
They can also be used for a company profile
if you have an example of something going
on at the business.
Descriptive leads
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A descriptive lead puts emotion or a human
element into a message.
It is often describing to the reader a scene
that the reporter saw or watched.
Could appeal to senses.
A descriptive lead about a feather factory
would begin with the foul mess of wet duck
feathers.
Question and Quote leads
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Again, question and quote leads should be
avoided.
They are rarely successful.
In most cases they are the lazy writers way
out, and they turn off audiences.
Question leads give the reader the option of
turning elsewhere.
Direct address leads
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These types of leads talk directly to the
reader an typically use the word “you”
In business journalism, they can be effective
when there is a deadline approaching, such
as Christmas shopping or income tax returns.
Most often are used to address consumers,
not companies.
Staccato leads.
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A staccato lead is a series of single words
used to indentify someone of something.
These can often be used in feature-type
stories such as CEO and company profiles.
Smart. Aggressive. Easy-going.
These are the words used to describe Joe
Six-Pack, the new CEO of Widgets R Us, by
his former employees.
Leads checklist
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Once you have written your lead, go back and examine these
essential elements.
1. Look at he facts and decide which are most important
2. Whether the sentence is simple and complete.
3. Whether the sentence is accurate.
4. Whether the sentence is relevant to the audience.
5.Whether the sentence comes to a point and make sense.
6. Whether the sentence uses strong, active words,
7. Whether the lead sets up the story.
Leads checklist
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These elements are also desirable in your
lead:
1. Emphasizing the latest information
2. Including the unusual aspects.
3. using a local angle.
4. Keeping the lead short and readable.
5. Attracting the audience’s attention.
6. Summarizing the message.