Transcript Writing Coach`s suggested change

CHAPTER 5:BUSINESS COMMUNICATION
Creating and Delivering Messages that Matter
COMMUNICATION SKILLS:
YOUR INVISIBLE ADVANTAGE
Effective Communication –
Happens when you transmit
meaning – relevant meaningto your audience.
Noise -
Any interference that causes
the message you send to be
different from the message
your audience understands.
Communication Barriers Obstacles to effective
communication.
ELECTRONIC WRITING

Blessing
 Faster
 Simpler
 Spelling/grammar

checkers
Curse
 Faster
 Simpler
 Spelling/grammar
checkers
SPELLBOUND
I have a spelling checker,
It came with my PC,
It plainly marks four my revue
Mistakes I cannot sea.
I’ve run this poem threw it,
I’m sure your pleased too no,
Its letter-perfect in it’s weigh,
My checker tolled me sew.
ELECTRONIC WRITING

Americans becoming dependent on computers for
literacy


Working vocabulary of average 14-year-old dropped
from 25,000 to 10,000 words over past 50 years
Determine best uses of technology
Software skills
 Attachments to be shared via e-mail
 How far to trust technology

COMMUNICATION BARRIERS:
THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT

Physical barriers

Language barriers

Body language barriers
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Perceptual barriers

Organizational barriers
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Cultural barriers
INTERCULTURAL COMMUNICATION
As globalization gains speed,
intercultural communication will
become increasingly pivotal to longterm business success
NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION: BEYOND
THE WORDS
Reinforce the meaning of your
message.
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
Eye contact
Tone of voice
Facial expressions
Gestures and posture
ACTIVE LISTENING: THE GREAT DIVIDER
Hourly Employee
Manager
Executive
Top Salesman
30%
60%
75%
75%
“
“Lying is done with
words and also with
silence”
- Adrienne Rich
“
% of time spent listening:
CHOOSE THE RIGHT CHANNEL: A RICH ARRAY
OF OPTIONS
Consider the audience it’s not about you!
Communication
Channels –
Figuring out the right
way to send a message.
The number of options is
growing…
IT’S A MATCHING GAME
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

Avoid impersonal writing, such as e-mail and notes, for
“heavy” messages.
Deliver “bombs” in person, if possible…
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution is reporting that RadioShack
has notified 400 workers by e-mail that they are being laid off.
The e-mail stated, 'The work force reduction notification is
currently in progress. Unfortunately your position is one that has
been eliminated.'
 Or use formal communications such as letters and memos.

COMMUNICATION CHANNELS: LEVELS
OF RICHNESS VARY
Memos/Reports
E-Mail
Instant Message
Voice Mail
Telephone Conversation
Videoconferencing
In-Person Presentation
Face-Face Meeting
Very Low. No information from tone
or body language.
Very Low. No information beyond
words.
Very Low. Very few words lead to
basic communication.
Low. The audience gains tone but
no body language.
Moderate. The audience benefits
from changes in your tone.
High. Conveys richness similar
to in-person communication.
High. Audience experiences
all elements of message.
Very High. Audience experiences
full message most directly.
REMEMBER
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In emotional situations ...


The more emotional the message, the more personal the medium
 High emotion: In person (assess & adapt)
 Medium emotion: Handwritten letter (careful choice of words,
paper, ink)
 Low emotion: Typed letter (careful choice of words, paper,
formatting)
STOP and THINK before communicating
TIPS FOR EXCELLENT EMAIL

Consider both your primary and secondary readers.
Keep it short.
Don’t forget to proofread.
Use standard writing.
Avoid attachments.
Don’t assume privacy.
Avoid anything nearing “off-color”
E-mail belongs to your employer!
Respond promptly to e-mails.
Assume the best.
Create a compelling subject line.

Think before you write, and think again before you send!
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TRIVIA QUIZ
ANSWER
What report gets better reaction:
3-page
or
10-page?
It depends.
TRIVIA QUIZ
ANSWER
What’s preferred
in
business
writing?
Accuracy
Organization
Maximum meat/Minimum fat
Attention to detail
PICK THE RIGHT WORDS: ANALYZE
YOUR AUDIENCE

Expectations


What kind of language do most people use in the
organization?
Education
What vocabulary should you use?
 How complex should you make the message?


Profession

Are there professional acronyms and jargon that can impact
your message?
BUSINESS WRITING TIPS
Know audiences’ preferences
 Professors/boss
preferences
Be adaptable
 Time
issues
 Stress issues
Use reference materials
BUSINESS WRITING STYLE
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Recommended for Neeley students
Franklin Covey’s
Style Guide
For Business and Technical Communication
PICK THE RIGHT WORDS: BE
CONCISE
“I will spend an hour
editing an eight word
sentence into five”
- Jerry Seinfield


Be clear and concise
But include all required
information
REMEMBER
On the written page, being
clear and concise
is more important
than being
impressive, brilliant,
literary, or academic.
PICK THE RIGHT WORDS: AVOID
SLANG
Do not alienate yourself by
using slang in
written or verbal
communication.
WRITING SCHEDULE
Establish absolute deadlines
Meet deadlines on schedule
Work backwards from project due-date to
set working due-dates
THINK IN REVERSE
Finalized document due on ________
Proofreading due on ________
Final draft due on ________
Editing #2 due on ________
Revision due on ________
Editing #1 due on ________
Rewrite due on ________
First draft due on ________
WHY IS DRAFTING SO HARD?
We don’t write the way we speak
FIRST DRAFT
 Center
on subject and substance
 DON’T worry about editing and proofing—yet
 BUT, don’t neglect editing and proofing or you get the
OOPS factor …
“OOPS!” FACTOR
Fyrst, lern ta spel!
“OOPS!” FACTOR
Suppose attendance will drop?
“OOPS!” FACTOR
So much for the secret.
“OOPS!” FACTOR
New product offering?
“OOPS!” FACTOR
Talk about oxymorons!
“OOPS!” FACTOR
Care to check in?
PICTURE LESSONS
Writing should be this clear.
PICTURE LESSONS
Consider readers’ perspectives
Plan ahead
Edit carefully
Proofread carefully
Have someone else read it
PICK THE RIGHT WORDS: AVOID
BIAS

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Gender Bias
Age Bias
Race, Ethnicity and Nationality Bias
Use Active Voice Where Possible
Active Voice – the subject of your
verb is doing the action
Passive Voice – the subject of your
sentence is not doing the action
described by the verb
ACTIVE VOICE

In sentences written in active voice, the subject performs the
action expressed in the verb; the subject acts.
PASSIVE VOICE

In sentences written in passive voice, the subject receives the
action expressed in the verb; the subject is acted upon. The
agent performing the action may appear in a "by the . . ."
JUST PLAIN ENGLISH
Be clear and direct when choosing your words:
Approximately
About
Provided that
If
In the event that
If
Utilize
Use
Has the capability to
Can
Close Proximity
Near
Transmit
Send
SAME MESSAGE, DIFFERENT APPROACH
If your recipient will feel
positive or neutral:
Begin with your
bottom line
If your recipient will feel
negative about your
message:
Start with the rationale and
follow with your bottom line
WRITE HIGH-IMPACT MESSAGES:
BREAKING THROUGH THE CLUTTER
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Strike the right tone
Don’t make grammar goofs
Use block paragraphs
Use headings and bulleted
lists
WRITING: STRIKE THE RIGHT TONE

Use common words in most situations
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Use active voice
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We made a mistake versus A mistake was made
Use personal pronouns whenever appropriate


use versus utilize
I, you
Use contractions as often as you would when
speaking
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I’ll, don’t, here’s
WRITING: DON’T MAKE GRAMMAR
GOOFS

It is OK to end a sentence with a preposition when doing
so sounds natural
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It is OK to begin sentences with “And” or “But”
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Where is this book from? is much better than From where is this
book?
Most teens enjoy videogames with a moderate level of violence.
But a small, vocal minority strongly advocates a more clean-cut
approach
It is OK to split infinitives

Try to effectively film the next scene is a perfectly acceptable
sentence
WRITING: USE BLOCK PARAGRAPHS

Standard Business Writing
 Use
single spacing
 Double space between paragraphs
 Do not indent the first sentence of your paragraphs
WRITING: USE HEADINGS AND
BULLETED LISTS

Headings
 Not
a title, but subject label
 Effective even in short documents

Bulleted List
 Engage
your readers
 Direct their attention
EXECUTIVE SUMMARY
Essential for readers who don’t have the time, interest or
need to read the entire document
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Most important part of document
Last piece of document created
VERY short
Introduction/body/conclusion
Enough detail to reflect content
Concise and complete enough (even if full document
never is read)
EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

Comprehensive restatement of …
 Purpose
 Scope
 Conclusions
 Results
 Recommendations
EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

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No new information
Use transitional words/phrases
Follow organization of document
Do not refer to document’s …
Tables
 Figures
 Appendices
 References
 Other explanatory materials

WHY IS EDITING SO HARD?
We don’t write the way we speak.
Most business writing is too verbose.
Focus on content and meaning
Facts/analysis/recommendations
Numbers and charts
Structure and organization
Sentence/phrase interpretation
Consistency
EDITING PRACTICE
Short-term planning is foremost in the
prioritization of the planning loop.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
Short-term planning comes first.
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EDITING PRACTICE
It is recommended that a legal action against a
foreign company for the profit under
contention would not be a wise move.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
Suing a foreign company for this amount of
money is unwise.
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EDITING PRACTICE
It is Sabrina’s proposal for the adoption of the
employee profile software by the personnel
department. This software provides assistance in the
selection of new employees.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
Sabrina proposes that the personnel department adopt
employee profile software for new-employee
selection.
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PROOFREADING

Focus on format and usage
 Appearance
on page
 Spelling, grammar, typographical errors
 Electronic checks (be careful!)
 Physical check of printed copy
 Usage errors
 Language confusion
 Capitalization and punctuation
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PROOFREADING TIPS
Check
every
capitalization,
punctuation,
word
division,
Pay
special
attention
to
headings,
topic
Practice!
Read aloud to slow down and catch
number,
chart, etc. visuals,
sentences
of
paragraphs,
more grammar/sense flaws
captions
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WHY IS PROOFING SO HARD?
Read in unison…
Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,
it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod
are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and
lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a
total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit
porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not
raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a
wlohe.
PROOFREADING PRACTICE
The nurse and herpatient discussed her
plans for the future.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
The nurse and her#patient discussed the
patient’s plans for the future.
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PROOFREADING PRACTICE
Don enjoys chemistry and he has
always wanted to be a chemist.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
Don enjoys chemistry and always wanted
to be a chemist.
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PROOFREADING PRACTICE
In the land of Nod no one wears cloths.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
In the land of Nod, no one wears clothes.
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PROOFREADING PRACTICE
Due to incriminating circumstances, the
judge decided to dismiss the charges.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
Due to extenuating circumstances, the judge
decided to dismiss the charges.
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PROOFREADING PRACTICE
The tourism industry is becoming
saturated, and should not grow at it’s
past rate.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
The tourism industry is becoming saturated,
and should not grow at its past rate.
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PROOFREADING PRACTICE
I have been wrong by so many of my
so called friends.
Writing Coach’s suggested change:
I have been wronged by so many of my
so-called friends.
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AND NOW, THE LAST WORD…
 Every time you write, at every phase
(drafting/editing/proofreading), consider:
– Purpose of the communication
– Medium and its effects
– Possible audience interpretations
HOW EMBARRASSING!